KEEP IT SIMPLE

Saint Joseph of Cupertino

I have come under criticism for being rather simplistic in my online writing. I suppose I could be more sophisticated or entertaining, but I feel that, at times, our appetites for entertainment and soothing words mask a spiritual life that is disintegrating.

If we haven't got the basics under control, which many of us do not, all of the simpering commentary about our deep love for the Lord and the mystical feelings we experience therefrom, are just our own personal propaganda that we use to hide the fact that we are morally corrupt.

Do you lie, cheat and steal without confession and remorse? You can bellow out the words to your favorite hymn at church, cry at the reception of the eucharist, donate all your time to your "ministry", have a vocabulary complete devoid of swear words, and, although the world may cover you with flowers, you may still go to hell.

The Last Judgment

Many people presume upon the forgiveness of the Lord while they are lying, stealing and murdering and do not confess and repent of it. One woman, after I heard her lying to someone on the phone (in order to gain a monetary advantage) told me, "Don't you worry about me, Missy - I am going to heaven!" and "it isn't a lie, it's just a story." Later, she stole from me. Then I saw her stealing the food that was left out at the mailboxes for the food drive for which the postal workers were collecting for the poor. She lied about it later. ("It isn't a lie, it's a story.") It makes me very sad because, without confession and repentance, she will go to Hell, and I do not want anyone to go to Hell. I pray that she confesses and repents so that I may see her in Heaven.

There are also people who put themselves forward as spiritual personalities in order to hide their crimes. I heard of one who killed a wealthy, demented spouse with an overdose, had the body quickly cremated without a doctor seeing it, and collected sympathy cards with a sad air, between giving sappy sermons about the poor man they murdered. While the world rewards them for their spiritual masquerade, God certainly won't. Eternity is a very long time, and their ill-gotten gains won't accompany them after death.

Saint Theresa of Avila, in ecstacy

I love the mystical life. It is thrilling to read stories about the saints who experienced the miraculous, who heard the voice of the Lord and received his embrace in ecstacy. It is popular to focus on this aspect of spiritual life, and it IS a very real manifestation of spirituality, but it isn't what Jesus emphasized.
                                             

Saint Gregory

Jesus told us that he did not come to bring peace, but the sword. He said that our families would be rent apart, with one member against another. He told us that some people, at the end, would call out to Him, "Lord! Lord!" and that He would send them away, telling them that He does not know them. He promised that those who love Him would follow his commandments and would go to heaven.

Icon of the "ladder to heaven"

If you follow the commands of the Lord and live a truly holy life, it will separate you from those who do not follow him. It will make you a target of the evil that lives within the hearts of those who do not really love the Lord. You will suffer on this earth, just as Christ himself suffered. Those who do not obey the commandments of the Lord will lie about you and work against you in every way. They will steal from you and try to punish you for your goodness because evil cannot bear to see the beauty of the Lord that is manifested in one who is following the commandments of Jesus.

We weren't promised financial reward in exchange for a holy life. Some of the modern Protestant denominations promote a scandalous "prosperity gospel" which plays right into the modern love of money. It also encourages prejudice against the poor, which is the opposite of the message of Jesus and his apostles. I have seen it confuse people and pervert their faith. Some mistakenly think that, if they are living a prosperous life, then everything they do must be holy, and that is not the criteria that Jesus gave us.

I write about this topic because I think it is needed. We have plenty of entertaining books and blogs, as well as political writing that pretends to be spiritual but helps to distract us from the basics. I am attempting to direct attention to Jesus and what He said - to the Church and what it teaches - and to the Bible and the guidance it provides, because I have been shocked and saddened to see the large number of people who lie, cheat, steal, and murder while delusionaly believing that they will go to heaven anyway.

Because of love for my neighbor, fellow-feeling and compassion, I would like to see everyone go to Heaven. I am trying to encourage everyone to look to the faith and get their foundation built solidly on the commandments of Jesus that are built on the Ten Commandments of the Old Testament.

In short, stop your lyin' cheatin' and stealin' ya'll!

Silver Rose 

(Sannyasini Kaliprana)

Silver Cottage Ashram Hermitage

Albuquerque, New Mexico

ECCENTRICS OFFER UNEXPECTED GIFTS

For more than 30 years, my grandmother lived in a boarding house situated in a gorgeous old brownstone near the University Hospital, where she was the head night nurse on the psychiatric ward.

Over the years, during numerous visits to Grammy, I came to know and love the others in the house, many of whom were also long-time residents. There was one man in particular who was considered a bit odd because his room was piled high with newspapers.

It wasn't a mean-spirited assessment. I just think that my Grammy didn't know him very well and, on the surface, all those piles of newspapers were incomprehensible to her. It turns out that he was interested in politics, and he went on to become a public servant of some sort. The newspapers made perfect sense in that context.

Whenever I run across the occasional eccentric, I think about that man and his piles of newspapers. I assume that the eccentricities of everyone make some kind of sense in some context as yet unknown to me.

So far, it has been my experience that eccentrics bring valuable, if unexpect gifts, to the table. I make an effort to remember this when I come into contact with people whose behavior is outside the norm. Of course, sometimes they ARE crazy, but, more often than not, they're not.

I am dedicating my prayers today to the eccentrics of the world.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose

TRUTH AND LIES - HEAVEN AND HELL

There is a saying that "possession is nine tenths of the law."

What this means is that our laws mostly have to do with matters of who owns what; nine tenths of the law being an arbitrary number to convey the concept of "most."

What it does NOT mean is that, if you manage to grab hold of a thing it is automatically yours. There is no legal principle or law that even vaguely promotes this idea. Our society recognizes theft as something bad and punishable. Not only will the law require you return the item you have misappropriated, but it will punish you over and above depriving you of this thing that you wanted bad enough to steal.

Even if you find something valuable on the sidewalk, the law will return it to its rightful owner, if the owner can prove that it belongs to him.

People are selfish, however, and they WANT to believe that the law will support their selfishness. A character in a movie I watched recently was expounding that "possession is nine-tenths of the law." I wondered if the screen writer realized his mistake or if he was deliberately making a comment about the point of view of the character, who was a brutal thug.

I once tried to explain this to a woman who takes herself very seriously as a spiritual personality. With her nose in the air, she decreed, "This is what that saying means NOW," as if she could change the meaning of a word on demand.

Just because some people misunderstand a thing does not mean that, by the force of their misunderstanding, some principle becomes altered. No, Virginia, there is no Santa Claus. Something is not yours, just because you manage to get your hands on it. Believing otherwise will not change the law. Just rob a bank and see how much of the law protects your right to do so.

Often, it seems to me, people incorporate lies into their worldview without regard for the damage it does to their soul. People who are not self-reflective, who do not examine themselves honestly, believe and promote convenient lies that cater to their selfishness and darken their souls thereby.

The brilliance of Catholic confession is that helps us root out the darkness that takes root in us when we are not paying attention. Selfish ideas feed selfish motives, which feed selfish acts. This is why Jesus gave the apostles the ability to forgive sin, something which previously was reserved to God alone. Jesus recognized our spiritual weakness, our tendency to selfishness and sin. He loves us enough to give us a method of restoring our souls to the purity of God's original intention for us.

In the examination of conscience before confession, we shine a critical light on our actions. We have to adjust our point of view to the purity of God's perspective. If we struggle in our effort to align our beliefs with those of the church, the degree of the struggle is the degree to which we have wandered away from Him who is all Truth.

Spiritual house-cleaning is essential to our happiness. There is no deception in God and we cannot join with God, on earth or in heaven, if we have joined our souls with the darkness of deception. Lies are of the Devil, and he is the father of all lies. If a lie is coming from us, then we have Satan within us. We must throw him out.

Many people firmly believe that, no matter what they do on earth, they will go to heaven when they die. They ignore the words of Jesus:

"Not every one who saith to me, Lord, Lord shall enter into

the kingdom of heaven, but he that doth the will of my father

who is in heaven, he shall enter into the kingdom of heaven."

Matthew 7:21

One of the things that Protestants removed from the faith was formal confession. They believe that you do not need to get forgiveness from "a man" of the church. You can go to God directly. If that was all one needed to do, Jesus would have decreed it. He didn't. He had a reason for giving the apostles the ability to forgive sin. He breathed upon them, giving them the Holy Spirit, and said:

"Whose sins you shall forgive, they are forgiven them;

and whose sins you shall retain, they are retained."

John 20:23

The brilliance of the Catholic faith is manifest to a great extent in the opportunity of confession. Jesus was the best psychologist we could ever have, in my opinion. He provided a prescription for the reparation of our souls - a divine "do-over," if you will.

Many people do not believe in hell or the Devil any more. I assure them that the Devil certainly believes in THEM. Even if one has managed to reduce God and Satan, heaven and hell, to abstract principles of good and evil, one cannot dispense with the necessity for goodness within ourselves in order to reside with goodness in the hereafter.

Even if you can't make yourself go to confession, or if finding the time or opportunity is difficult, I recommend the process of regular self-reflection, as it has been very helpful to me. If you can keep yourself on the right track by daily self-correction, you'll have less to confess when you finally make it to a formal confession.

It has been my experience that, if I incline my mind toward God, the rest of me follows suit. Here, on the verge of the celebration of Pentacost, I ask for your prayers, that I may grow closer to the Lord. I will pray the same for you.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose Parnell

INTERNET SERVICE IS DEGRADING - BLOGGING WILL BE LIMITED

The internet service I have been using is the cheapest available, but it is no longer working most of the time. It takes me HOURS to get the simplest task accomplished online. The connection gets lost hundreds of times every day, and I have to do the same functions over and over again.

The telephone lines are 30 years old and were not meant to carry internet.  Telephone company repairmen have all told me that, if I was living in a house, rather than a large apartment complex, it would be a simple matter to get the internet directly to the outside wall and bypass the old wires, but I am not allowed to do that in the large apartment complex where I live.

I am not able to afford better service. Comcast pretty much has the monopoly on THAT.

Many years ago, I had responded to a "special" that Comcast was running. I had to subscribe to television service in order to get the internet. It is one of the arbitrary rules that they impose in order to sucker the consumer into purchasing things they do not need.

After the technician installed the equipment, I could not get it to work properly. I could not get very many channels. The internet was slow. The voice remote was not working.

I assumed that it was "operator error" since I am not technologically savvy, in many ways. It was a few months before I finally gave up trying to "learn" how to work the equipment and I called them and had them send out ANOTHER technician. That technician advised me that I had been set up with the wrong equipment, the wrong channels, the wrong service. I had been paying top dollar for what we affectionately call "ghetto cable" here in poor town.

I cancelled Comcast service because of all this mess, and now they claim I OWE THEM $211 ! They owe ME, but it is impossible to get through to them.

I refuse to pay these con artists a single cent for "services" I did not receive. I tried to talk to them about it this morning, but, of course, the woman barely spoke English and just kept repeating that her "system" is telling her that I owe them money. She refused to acknowledge anything I said to her about the previous experience, and just kept repeating the same thing, like a machine. Perhaps I WAS speaking to a machine. I do not know.

Something in the back of my mind also tells me that committing myself to another big bill, even if I were to get enough donations to cover the expenses, is NOT a good idea for an independent religious person.

Being disabled, it is almost impossible to live without cable, but I CAN live with and struggle with the horrible service that I have now, which is at least half as cheap as Comcast. It takes me ten times as long to shop or do anything else on the internet with this horrible service, so I will have to give up some things that are not necessary. Perhaps God wants me to pray more and compute less?

In any case, what this means for the blog is that blogging will be very limited. Do not be alarmed if I do not post for some time. The page is still active. The donation button works. I am still reachable. Feel free to comment. That is the easiest way to communicate with me. Otherwise, you can look me up on Facebook, where I have a presence.

God bless you all. I shall continue to pray for you.

Silver Rose

AYN RAND: APOSTLE OF SELFISHNESS AND HERO OF THE ALT. RIGHT

Ayn Rand

Russian-American novelist, promoter of selfishness, 

hero of the alt. right

1905-1982

Russian educated atheist Ayn Rand believed that selfishness was a positive virtue. She hated Christianity, championed abortion and, in addition to writing a few toxic novels and a small volume about selfishness, she also started a club that was dedicated to the promotion of selfishness. That the right wing lauds her and follows her selfish prescriptions for American society is a jarring contradiction, ESPECIALLY since the majority self-identify as Christian, and Rand's philosophy is the antithesis of Christianity.

"Abortion is a moral right which should be left to 

the sole discretion of the woman involved; 

morally, nothing other than her wish in the

matter is to be considered."

~ Ayn Rand ~

Several of America's contemporary government leaders have been remarkably affected by the fantasies of this novelist whose world view, if widely enacted, would regress the civilizing influence of Christianity on mankind back to the beginning of time.

Rand wasn't an economist and, in fact, her imaginative pronouncements on this field are dismissed by professional economists who have studied the history of economic systems and who know that we are stronger together than we are individually. It is the positive glory of human beings that we aim to enable every one of our members to succeed, and we lift up one another because we know that, in doing so, the human species becomes more successful. The dog-eat-dog world of Ayn Rand produces the opposite result.

"Jesus said unto him, 'thou shalt love the Lord thy God

with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy

mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the

second is like unto it, thou shalt love thy neighbor as 

thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law

and all the prophets.'"

~ Matthew 22:37-40 ~

Because selfishness, xenophobia, racism and misogyny that are promoted by the alt right are damaging to the human race, as a whole, the alt. right movement, as typified in its most virulent form in the ravings of Steve Bannon, has to discredit and discount the experts in crucial fields of knowledge, even Biblical scholards. This bizarre subculture lionizes opinion without foundation while deriding experts in favor of fiction writers.

Steve Bannon and Marie LePen - 2018

"Let them call you racists. Let them call you xenophobes. 

Let them call you nativists. Wear it as a badge of honor."

~ Steve Bannon, 2018 ~

Ayn Rand was famously racist and nationalistic. She spoke against Native Americans, Arabs and indigenous people, in general. Her brand of politics is for white people only.

Followers of alt. right personalities resolutely ignore professional opinion in favor of people whom they perceive to be the common man, in whom they see themselves in some capacity. The pleasing mirage that the alt right personalities project, caters to the ordinary white guy, who then feels that maybe he too can rule the world without the bona fides typically required to do so. Slovenly Steve Bannon, with his baggy clothes and unkempt mop of hair, is their spokesman.

What is really going on here? At the heart of the modern alt right movement is the fight of the wealthy to grab even more wealth than they already have. The disparity of income in America is already the second worst in the world among all nations, but the wealthy are using hot button issues to coerce the white majority into helping them in the biggest smash-and-grab since before the French Revolution. The poor, disabled and elderly are hungry and poorly housed, yet the wealthy want to eliminate social programs that help alleviate their suffering. Ayn Rand disparages the charity that would help them.

"Those who shut their ears to the cries of the poor, will

themselves call and not be heard."

~ Proverbs 21:13 ~

Ayn Rand is the figurehead upon which the right hangs its political hat because her philosophy is conveniently hostile to poor people and minorities. According to Rand, it is immoral to make a man contribute to the welfare of the poor, vis-a-vis taxes. This is contrary to the Christian ethos, but the followers of the alt right are so mesmerized by the smoke and mirrors of Paul Ryan and people like him that they fail to call this movement into account for its violation of the central tenets of Christianity.

"You shall give generously [to your poor brother] and your

heart shall not be grieved when you give to him, because

for this thing the Lord your God will bless you in all your

work and in all your undertakings."

Deuteronomy 15:10

On Facebook and other social media, I have had too many conversations with supporters of the lies of the alt. right mouthpieces who blame everyone's troubles on lazy, criminal poor people, minorities, and the like.

When faced with hard facts that disprove the myth of "massive fraud in the disability system," for instance, supporters resolutely cling to the lies. The payoff for believing poor-hating propaganda is too great to give it up, since those lies serve to elevate the status of the common man without any effort - somewhat like the video games that allow us to be big winners by the flick of a finger on a button. To be a winner, without having to bend one's head to any authority, without having to accept inconvenient truths that emphasize our lack of status, and without exerting a lot of effort, is too heady a wine for people who have chaffed under the annoying limitation of being ordinary for such a long time. Why accept facts when the lies let us believe that the poor are to blame for all our difficulties?Having a scape goat that possesses less power than we do allows us to look down upon them and pretend to some superiority. It is also far easier to withdraw assistance from the poor than to reclaim the ill-gotten gains of the wealthy.

"For all those who exalt themselves shall be humbled,

and those who humble themselves shall be exalted."

~Luke 14:11~

The psychology of Christianity is brilliant. People of real religious faith and comprehension already know this, but it also stands the test of objective examination. We can reject selfishness, not just because Jesus said so, but because it doesn't produce good fruit for humanity as a whole. We can embrace modesty and humility, not just because Jesus said to do it, but because those virtues propel us in a positive direction that is healthy for the individual as well as the group. We can share our wealth with the poor, not just because it is emphasized continually throughout the Old AND the New Testaments, but because it makes sense for the survival of our species.

The authorities upon whom one bases one's world view and activities is a clue to one's heart, so I ask you: Who is your authority? Is it Jesus, or is it Ayn Rand?

THE SOUND OF SILENCE

"I need solitude for my writing - not like a "hermit" - 

that wouldn't be enough -

but like a dead man."

~Franz Kafka~

Earlier this month, I had to stop in the middle of a grocery store aisle and yell, "This music is too loud!" Of course, no one paid the slightest bit of attention to this crazy lady, holding her hands to her ears in the dog food aisle while some old song blasted out of the speakers above my head.

Shopping used to be very enjoyable for me. Stores were quiet. If there WAS music, it was typically very soothing, but then some idiot got the bright idea to bombard shoppers with advertisements punctuated by blaring music. The advertisements are created by manufacturers of the products that the stores sell. The store gets some kind of financial benefit from the manufacturers when they blast their customers with this kind of canned sound.

I learned this about 5 years ago, when I complained to the manager of Smiths grocery store, where I used to shop. The manager told me that she wasn't allowed to turn the music down, even though I appeared to be the only person shopping there, at some odd time of day. "Corporate" had to approve turning off or turning down the volume of the music. The customer is no longer right. The customer is now a captive.

The problem with loud music is that it prevents me from concentrating on what I need to buy. Instead, I typically flee the premises, my head pounding, and a growing sense of desperation. Half the time, I don't buy half of what is on my list. I have learned what I can go without, as a result of this recent assault on my brain cells. Smiths Grocery Store, and other corporate monsters, would make more money if they eliminated this music torture from their policies, but I doubt they will give it up, since they believe they are benefiting from it financially. Maybe the manufacturers of the products give them more money than what they would make from the customers who run frantically out of their stores.

Smiths Grocery Store no longer gets any of my meager funds. Instead, I shop at Sprouts, but they have ALSO started playing really loud music. To combat this modern tendency, I have taken to wearing ear plugs when I shop. They help to tone down the volume, but I would be happier if they took out all the noise.

A few years ago, I found out that I have several eye problems that are going to result in partial or complete blindness at some point in the future. I really wish I could have lost my hearing instead.

I have always wondered why appreciation for peace and quiet does not seem to be shared by others, since even when people have the option to enjoy the sounds of nature, for instance at a park, they will destroy the environment with loud radios and other noise devices. I have often remarked about this to friends, wondering aloud why other people seem to be intent on receiving as many separate streams of noise as is humanly possible, whereas I cannot even filter out a conversation if music is also playing.

Yesterday, I read a medical ARTICLE about how some great writers and creative people have an inability to filter out extraneous noise. They have the kind of brains that incorporate a wide ranging amount of information in their construction of literature, or painting or whatever. Marcel Proust also wore ear plugs! He covered the walls of his room with cork.

Evidently, creative geniuses have "leaky sensory gating." I am very happy to be in such illustrious company, instead of just being eccentric. Now, if I could only be paid like a genius, my life would be a heck of a lot more serene. I could buy a shipment of cork.

Silver Rose Parnell
(c) Copyright 2018
All rights reserved.

ALL LIES COME FROM SATAN

Lucifer is banished from Heaven

When you become holy, the devil hates you. When you pray, it makes him scream in rage. He wants you to be HIS minion. He is jealous of God, and that jealousy is what got him kicked out of Heaven to begin with . Lies are the method by which Satan binds followers to himself, and lies are a sure sign of someone who has given themselves to the dark one.

The number, kind and degree of lies that a person spews is a sure indicator of just how much the liar is in thrall to Satan.  If you are a holy person, however, the degree to which you are merged with God is the same degree to which the Devil's people will attack you.

"Do not think that I came to send peace upon earth:

I came not to send peace, but the sword. For I came 

to set a man at variance against his father, and the 

daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law

against her mother in law. And a man's enemies shall

be they of his own household. He that loveth father

or mother more than me is not worthy of me; and he

that loveth son or daughter more than me is not 

worthy of me. And he that taketh not up his cross

and followeth me, is not worthy of me"

~Matthew 10:34-38~

When we give our lives to the Lord, and if we obey his commandments, we become part of the body of Christ. As adopted sons and daughters of the Lord, we share the goodness that is God. There is no deceit in God. There cannot be! Therefore, people who lie distance themselves from God and join themselves with Satan. Liars share Satan's hatred for the goodness of God, and if a liar sees goodness in another person, the liar automatically hates the good in that person.

This is why the holier you become, the more troubles you may have. You will be the prime target of every evil that you encounter.

Some people imagine that the more holy you are, the more fun your life will be, and the more worldly success you will have. Just look at the lives of Jesus and his followers and you will realize the folly of that idea. Jesus and all but one of the apostles died in grisly fashion because they were holy.

We are called by Jesus to carry our cross. Carrying a cross isn't pretty. It is a harsh, sweaty, bloody struggle. Like Jesus, a crowd may taunt you, spit on you and call you names. They will lie about you and tear your reputation to shreds with vulgar cat calls. It isn't pretty, but we must not lose our nerve.

Saint Peter, on whom Christ built his church,

was crucified upside down

Banish the idea that love of God brings you earthly success. Quite the opposite. If you are a true believer, and if you follow our Lord sincerely, you may be in for a bumpy ride. Satan will pursue you unmercifully. He will torment you and try to turn you to him, tempting you with every earthly delight.

You may be surprised at the guise in which the Devil appears to allure you. There is no profession, no status and no beautiful visage that is automatically exempt. Satan sits within the most unexpected persons, squatting there like a fat toad, belching lies, calumny, and all manner of deceit. Satan has been a liar from the beginning, and appears in the first book of the Bible, coaxing Eve to eat the fruit of the tree of good and evil that God told her not to eat. Satan appeals to her ego, promising that she will be a God herself as a result of her disobedience, encouraging her to compete with the Lord - something with which he himself is familiar, having refused to serve God and been thrown out of heaven for it.

"And the serpent said to the woman, 'no, you shall

not die the death. For God doth know that in what 

day soever you shall eat thereof, your eyes shall be

opened: and you shall be as Gods, knowing good

and evil."

Genesis 3:4-5

If you are one of those holy people who has truly given themselves to the Lord, and you find yourself the target of lies and calumny, do not lose heart. Being attacked by liars is a sure sign that you are on the right track.

Pray for those who are trying to destroy you here on earth. They will be destroyed at the end of their lives and thrown into Hell like Satan, if they do not renounce him, not only by words, but by their actions. After all, even Satan can recite the Bible. It is one's actions that determine whether or not we really love the Lord.

Thy pride is brought down to hell,

thy carcass is fallen down: under

thee shall the moth be strewed, and

worms shall be thy covering. How 

art thou fallen from heaven, O

Lucifer, who didst rise in the 

morning? How art thou fallen to

the earth, that didst wound the nations?

~ Isaias 14:11-12 ~

PRAYERS NEEDED FOR THE HERMIT

Hermit in a garden

Painting by 

Hubert Robert

(1733-1808)

Since becoming disabled and, consequently, rather poor by American standards, I have been witness to and recipient of the hostile attitudes of Americans toward those on the lower end of the economic spectrum. While it has made me keenly aware of the mental suffering that is heaped upon the poor who already have quite enough in the way of difficulties in their lives, I have also been personally affected.

Although my Social Security is too high to qualify for almost all programs for the poor, I do qualify for a small discount on my rent. (Only the bottom third of poor people are eligible for government programs.) Very few properties have these programs, however, and when I moved into low income housing 14 years ago,  didn't know what I was getting into.

The onsite manager of the low-income property where I live is blatantly rude, greeting me with a pinched and ugly face whenever I try to communicate with her, and turning away from me when I try to speak. She has caused some chaos among the tenants by spreading gossip among us since she arrived here. (I became her target when I objected to her unleashed dog and its feces being left around the property and the multiple cars blocking the fire exit after she moved in.) It just escalated from there.

The manager's campaign of disinformation that was apparently calculated to draw down the ire of my neighbors on my head, has set off an apparently "sensitive" woman who now dances and chants 3 inches from my open windows. One of her performances last week had her chanting in a sing-song:

"Snippy snippy snippy

tattletale tattletale tattletale

You better not report me!"

She kept repeating this for several minutes, while she chanted into my bathroom window, as I was trying to use the facilities.

The previous manager who worked for the same management company ALSO spread rumors about the tenants. A social worker who regularly came to assess the needs of the elderly once pulled me aside and told me that the apartment manager was spreading some ridiculous lie of a sexual nature about me. The woman had a very strange imagination and, even though she knew that I had dedicated myself to God many years before that and that I had no romantic interests at all, I guess she thought it would be fun to just INVENT something. She did this all the time. She would get it into her head that something was true, despite having no knowledge of it at all, and then she'd spread a rumor.

This was the same manager who told me that poor people shouldn't ask for anything to be done in their apartments because they are getting a discount on their rent. They should just shut up and be grateful to have a roof over their heads. Other, similar comments were made. I am paying more than 30% of my income toward housing, yet I am often treated like the deadbeat friend who has been sleeping on your couch for three years.

The entrance to my imaginary hermitage

would be simple, small and inviting

For the longest time, the residents were dictated to as to when they were allowed to take a bath, wash the dishes or do the laundry. In another complex managed by the same company, the residents were told that they could not hang anything on their doors, decorative or otherwise because "poor people shouldn't expect to be able to do that kind of thing," or some such nonsense. ("No Christmas wreaths for YOU!" said Scrooge.)

All sorts of inappropriate measures of control and domination are employed against the poor, especially those who are alone, with no one to defend them. Single disabled old ladies, in particular, have learned to keep their heads down and not ask anything or complain. Most are afraid that they will be thrown out with nowhere to go.  Vacancies are few and far between in the low income housing complexes. The waiting lists are very long. There is simply not enough affordable housing. The housing that is available is in dangerous, crime ridden, traffic dense main streets, in neighborhoods that are usually "food deserts" with no grocery shopping for miles. Still - it is all there is. People who have no power cannot create decent housing out of thin air. They have to take what is available.

18th century hermitage

When I was a normal working person, I rarely had any interactions with the management of the buildings where I lived. I've lived in apartments for at least 40 years of my life, and never had any issues, except for one owner who was a drunk and who began showing up at my apartment, demanding sex. I moved out very quickly. That was an aberration. All my other experiences were pedestrian. I paid my rent. The landlords maintained the apartment. We parted amicably.

I imagined that, upon dedicating my life entirely to God, I would retire to a quaint little cottage, where all I would have to think about would be the God that I love. Having my attention diverted to unworthy topics by mean-spirited bullies is definitely not what I had in mind.

In my imagination, I live in this

"shabby chic cottage"

(with some adjustments for a prayer corner and chair!)

Recently, I read that our new head of Housing and Urban Development, Ben Carson (a retired surgeon) said that public housing should not be too comfortable, otherwise poor people will become dependent. He wants them to go to work and GET OUT.

Shortly after these comments were reported, it was discovered that he had spent $31,000.00 of taxpayer money for a dining room table, and that he intended to spend another $165,000.00 for a "lounge set." That dining room table cost nearly two years of my Social Security income, and is more than two years of a minimum wage earners take home income.

For a brain surgeon, he is an ignorant man. The vast majority of the poor are either working, have worked many years in the past, are unable to work or are CHILDREN and are not eligible to work. Fewer than 3% of the poor who receive "entitlement income" are able bodied people who are not working.

Evidently, a great number of Americans believe the same hogwash that Ben Carson and the GOP have been dishing out lately. I see it in the behavior of the management of the apartments where I live.

I also have a lot to say about the trend toward property ownership as a means of making money, rather than just having a place to live. "Flipping" properties is partially responsible for the astronomical rise in housing costs. The everyday American can no longer aspire to owning their own home, as a matter of course. A home in Boulder, Colorado that a friend's parents bought for $16,000 40 years ago, now sells for $350,000! That increase is not reflected in a proportionate increase in WAGES, however. Wages have stalled over the last 40 years, but corporate profits and CEO salaries have increased wildly.

I have spent years trying fix the issues that plague this apartment complex. First, I tried to make friends with the manager. That did not work very well. She continued to express opinions that were hostile to the poor residents, especially the elderly ones, whom she did not enjoy, and she spoke bitterly about them.

The current manager came to us from the same management company. She hit the ground nasty. Her demeanor is curt and rude, and that chip on her shoulder is quite large. (I have seen her switch modes on a dime, as it were, when an attractive man walks into the room.) With the tenants, however, she is ice.

It isn't just the tenants who are given the cold shoulder, though. Evidently, service personnel are lorded over by the woman in the front office. A delivery man was almost in tears one day after she abused him. I remember so vividly him saying, "just because she's beautiful doesn't mean she can just treat people like dirt." He was obviously feeling very stressed. He had to restrain his response, and I could tell that it was costing him some brain cells. His face was a little red. Tears were in his eyes, and I would bet his blood pressure was sky high.

In my imaginary hermitage

my kitchen window would look out onto 

a quiet and peaceful neighborhood.

Prior to becoming disabled, I was clueless about the mistreatment of the poor in American society. I never had a lot of money, but I was not on anyone's radar because I never received any services for the poor, even during periods of unemployment. I worked, paid my rent, and minded my own business.

Despite the rude treatment I have received from this manager, I have made a point to remark upon anything good that the management team did for me, and I reported it back to their boss. I think it is important to be fair to people. This was not appreciated. Instead, it was just used against me as "proof" that they never did anything wrong. It isn't anything of the sort, but dishonest people will twist themselves into a pretzel to make the facts into something that means the opposite of the truth.

Since making friends with management did not work, I began to try and get my needs met by reporting to the manager's boss, who just denied that her people had done anything I reported.

I have asked my state representative to step in, but, apparently, they couldn't do anything but forward my letter of complaint, which (after languishing for many weeks in his office) ended up in the hands of the very people who caused all the problems to begin with! Again, management just denied the truth and added some lies to spice things up a bit. They finished it off with a broad attempt at character assassination, escalating the whole mess.

Others who have lived in subsidized housing report very similar experiences of harassment, followed by gaslighting, which just feeds into the popular notion that people are poor because they are of poor character. People are poor because they don't have money.

The worst characters in the world can often be found among the wealthy, when you think about it. Many of them lack scruples, ethics and morals. No one wants to criticize the rich, however, otherwise they might not be able to get some of that lovely money with which the wealthy routinely bail themselves out of trouble when their misdeeds are found out.

In the Bible, it is made clear that the poor will see God. We have the best part of the bargain, in that case.

I imagined my hermitage might be

pink and sweet

Currently, I am in a Mexican standoff.  I have to conduct all my business with management in writing, otherwise they lie about it. A friend attended a meeting I had with the manager's boss and was as disappointed as I was about the result. The boss did nothing but deny and defend.

After 13 years, my patience has evaporated. I did my best to make this situation work, and I can only conclude that, in order to have some peace and quiet, I need to move to a market rate property in a more peaceful environment. In fact, I am amazed that I have endured this long. The Lord has blessed me with a very long fuse.

This experience has made me extremely wary of "low income housing." I can't imagine what else I will have to live without in order to pay another $200 a month in rent, which is what I estimate it will cost, but perhaps the new place will have cheaper electricity. Currently, the electricity in this apartment costs about $165.00 a month in the winter! I have often wondered if I am paying the electrical costs for someone else's apartment in addition to mine - or perhaps the exterior lights or something - but it may just be that the construction of this apartment is very drafty.

I ask for your prayers that I may find a proper space in which to pray, meditate, contemplate and get my physical needs met. My friends have been searching for a place for the last 3 or 4 years, with no luck. Let us pray that something in the right neighborhood opens up. I am hoping to be near friends who help me as well as a good church.

May God protect us all from the bullies!

Silver Rose
(c) Copyright 2018
All rights reserved.

SAINT OLGA AND SECOND CHANCES

Jesus is the Lord of second chances, and third chances and on and on and forever. The most unlikely people have become saints - not because they never did anything wrong, but because they repented and intentionally moved toward the Lord. My 34th great grandmother, for instance, is a stark example.

Saint Olga, "Equal to the Apostles"

879-969

My 34th great grandmother

Saint Olga (called "Equal to the Apostles" by the Orthodox Church) killed an entire ethnic minority of people in her land, in retaliation for their having killed her husband. She was devious and deliberate, and murdered them all. The same force, intention and will that was brought to bear on those awful deeds, was later directed to God and carried her to sainthood.

We can redirect our energies to that which is all good, and join the Lord, or we can direct them to that which is evil and go elsewhere. If we walk toward Him, Jesus opens the gates for us. If we deliberately choose evil, thinking that God will forgive us for doing so, we will be on another road, going to that other place, and, even though Jesus is standing at the gates, waiting for us, we will not be there. We have taken another road.

Indeed, Jesus even comes out onto the road to meet us, if we have chosen Him by doing His will. He and God the Father reside with us, when we demonstrate our love by 'keeping his word, i.e., obeying His commandments.

Jesus answered him, 'if anyone love me, he will keep

my word, and my father will love him, and we will

come to him and make our abode with him'

~ John 14:23 ~

All the major religious traditions are concerned with methods by which we may join the good and leave evil behind. This is a highly simplistic rendering, but true nonetheless.

Goodness is inclusive and generous, warm and embracing. Even if a person does not know Jesus but embraces goodness, he is already part of the body of Christ by doing so. The Catholic Church recognizes that God is goodness, itself, and welcomes that goodness in persons.

Some people, ignorant of the heart of the faith, choose the Good and travel the road toward God, keeping the commandments without knowing they are doing so, and find themselves being met by Christ and His Father on the road. Many have gotten a wonderful surprise after death, I would guess! Thus, there is no salvation outside of The Church, but The Church is an awful lot bigger than most people realize.

I once knew a woman who became enraged when I explained this doctrine of The Catholic Church. In the middle of a restaurant, she stood up and shrieked at me, "There is no salvation without Christ!" I tried to explain to her that she was right, but not in the way she believed she was right. Her legalism would exclude many good people who, through no fault of their own, did not know Christ but lived a life in keeping with Christ's commandments. She wasn't having any of it. She belonged to a legalistic, narrow church with a poor understanding of Christian theology.

The fact is that no one will ever be "good enough" to deserve Jesus, and, once you start inventing reasons to exclude people from heaven, there is no end to it.

"Those who, through no fault of their own, do not know the Gospel

of Christ or his Church but who nevertheless seek God with a sincere

heart, and, moved by grace, try in their actions to do his will and

they know it through the dictates of their conscience - those too may

achieve eternal salvation."

~ The Catechism of the Catholic Church~

The most important thing seems to be that we try to do His will. We will fail, of course, some of us many times, over and over again, but our Lord is the Lord of second chances, the Lord of Divine Love. He sees our hearts and knows our intentions.

The thing to examine during this time of Lent is whether or not we really ARE trying to do His will. Are we being obedient to everything, or have we rejected certain teachings because we don't agree with them? In this case, we have to ask ourselves why we think we are a better authority on the teachings of Jesus than His Church. What are our bona fides, our credentials? If we are honest with ourselves, we aren't the experts.

Our Lord is the Lord of second chances. Lent is the chance to take advantage of it. I pray you all make good use of it, and ask you to pray for me, as I pray for you.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose Parnell
(c) copyright 2018
All rights reserved.

MINDFULNESS AND TECHNOLOGY

Saint Julian of Norwich

Coming on the heels of the ridiculous concept of "multi-tasking," technological gadgets are frequently used as escape valves, removing us from engagement with life and others. How many times have you had a conversation with someone and, as soon as you start talking, you can hear them typing on their computer? Many people do this. Later, the recollection of the typist is missing crucial aspects of the conversation, and there is no comprehension of nuance at all.

Ironically, the thing which we are trying to obtain by retreating into gadgets is the very thing that will elude us when we use them for this purpose, i.e., peace of mind and heart.

It is just a fact that the mind cannot concentrate on more than one thing at a time. "Multi tasking" may APPEAR to be a situation in which one is doing two things, but the mind is simply being fractured at smaller and smaller intervals, popping back and forth between two or more objects of attention. While it is attending to one, it is missing signals from another, and vice versa.

Teresa of Avila in mystical union with the Lord

Modern life is so chaotic, so full of noise, news and fun new programs and devices, that it is easy to lose the regular habit of prayer and meditation. The advantage of cenobitic monastic, which is lived with other people, is that there is a structure into which everyone can fit themselves, and that structure carries each person along with scheduled periods of meditation. The rest of us have to discipline ourselves. Lent is the perfect time to reassess our habits so we can eliminate those that fracture the mind and increase those that serve our need for peace and prayer.

I have previously written about the simplification of my external circumstances and some habits of mind. Along with this type of spring cleaning, I find that I also have to revisit the discipline of mindfulness.

Mindfulness is a state of recollectedness in which all one's attention is focused on one wavelength, one topic, one person, in the present time. When occupied with God during prayer time, it allows me to be aware of His presence. When studying, it brings all my brain cells to bear on the topic, so that I can absorb as much as possible of the information. When interacting with others, I bring my whole self to the conversation and am thereby more genuinely present for others. It is necessary for prayer and meditation.

"Christ the Yogi"

When meditating, our capacity for mindfulness is increased, while mindfulness is also necessary for meditation to occur. They go hand-in-hand, each being required for the other. Meditation helps gather and focus the mind, the benefits of which extend far beyond the time devoted to prayer and spiritual disciplines.

There is a false idea being promoted by people who have little or no experience with mindfulness or Eastern meditative traditions that meditation is a process whereby you empty the mind of all thought and just passively float. It is the opposite. In meditation, one is completely focused on the object of meditation.

In the Christian world, we use the term "Contemplation" for what is called "meditation" in other religious traditions. Christians will be surprised to learn the many similarities between religions. The Lord is everywhere, except for hell, of course, which is simply the absence of God, I am told.

Father Bede Griffiths

In India

This little blog post is simplistic in the extreme. Saints and sages have written and taught thousands of words on meditation, contemplation and mindfulness.

I recommend reading some of Father Bede Griffiths' writings if you wish to learn more about this topic from the Catholic perspective. There are countless other authors and books. The Vedanta Society of Southern California has a catalog of books from various religious traditions that they have curated carefully, and I highly recommend them.

In the meantime, try putting aside your gadgets during times when you are supposedly doing something else, and establish regular times of prayer and contemplation in your daily schedule. Try to focus your mind on one thing at a time, and don't succumb to the chaos around you. See how you feel, and then let me know how it works for you.

May your Lenten journey be full of peace and love!

Silver Rose Parnell
(c) Copyright 2018
All rights reserved

CONTROL FREAK

My Command Post - 2018

When you are young and energetic, and you have time on your side, options and possibilities are seemingly endless. There are so many conceivable life tracks and end results that it resembles a good science fiction novel. Only the Divine Writer knows the end of your story.

At the end of your life, however, very little is under one's control. Mastery has flowed through your fingers, when once it was held solidly in your palm.

When you are 63, and you are going blind in an excruciatingly slow manner, your screaming bones won't take you further than a block or two from your car, and your relatives have stolen your inheritance, leaving you a pauper, options, life tracks and end results are frustratingly limited.

EXCEPT, when one is talking about the spiritual realm. THEN, the options are very big indeed. The picture is broad, expansive, fabulously transcendent. No matter how much suffering one endures on this earth, no matter how low people force you down the totem pole of estimation, no matter if you are so discounted that even Walmart wouldn't take you, Heaven is waiting for you on the other side - provided, of course, that you have not succumbed to the temptation for evil that Satan places before you at every opportunity he can find.

That woman who stole your husband? Do you wish that disaster befall her? Say goodbye to heaven. All those little lies you told because you have decided they do not matter? Say goodbye to heaven.
The overdose of sleeping pills you gave to your demented old relative because you are just sure that "he would not want to live like that." Say goodbye to heaven.

Say goodbye to heaven if you lie, cheat, steal, give false witness, commit adultery, or gossip with the girls over drinks at brunch, without remorse and without confession and absolution. Say goodbye to the Pearly Gates.

It is Lent, people. Time to repent, confess, and be shriven - or the end of your life won't be something to look forward to.

Amen.

Silver Rose Parnell

SLEEP WITH THE ANGELS

Bedroom suite

I have a beautiful bedroom suite which is fairly new, but by the time I finished paying for it, I was already having trouble sleeping in it, due to scoliosis and other back issues.

It has been a couple years since I slept in the bed, but it occupies the bedroom, sitting there like a giant toad, eating up all the space I COULD be using for something else. It is a mammoth thing, made of very heavy wood, cherry colored, with a padded faux leather backrest on each side. The foot rest is very handy to hold onto when I am changing my shoes or some such thing,and that is all it is good for, with the exception of hosting boxes of sewing gear and baskets of laundry.

Back pillows, knee pillows, leg pillows - I have tried them all, to no avail. I cannot sleep in the bed.

Dreams are something in my distantly remember past. I do not know the last time I had a sleeping dream, as opposed to a nightmare, but even nightmares elude me, as I have been sleeping in reclining chairs, and I never really go fully "under."

A few years ago, I priced mechanical mattresses - the kind that folds you up so that back and knees can both be elevated, with a mattress made of a special kind of foam. As soon as I lay in it and adjusted the level of lift for back and legs, I felt my whole body relax, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I could tell that sleeping on that bed would be like sleeping on clouds, sleeping with the angels.

THAT bed was $3,000 three years ago. Amazon has one for for about $1,000 right now - but the mattress is only 12 inches, and I can't believe it would accommodate my commodious frame!

The costs of disability are enormous, if you actually address the needs of the body. I used to sleep on a mattress on the floor when I was younger. It didn't phase me. Now,  the idea of going to sleep is stressful. Can you imagine?

Every time I have a need, I start to calculate. If I were to sell the bed and the matching carved end tables, I might be able to buy a little twin bed, and pray that my tall body would find rest on it, but I have no idea to whom I would sell my current set. I cannot have strangers coming to the apartment, etc. etc.

I am disgusted by the body's constant NEED for things, sick and tired of fretting over how I can possibly afford to address its needs! Really, it makes me want to throw my hands up in the air, scream, and throw something.

I think back over my life and wonder, how did I end up like this? It isn't as if I tried to be alone. It is just how things worked out. I started out as a nun in a Hindu convent and then converted to Christianity, but none of the Catholic institutions wanted an ex Hindu nun. It is a bridge too far for them, I suppose, and you really can't blame them. They imagine all sorts of things. Now, I am far too old and too sick to even pretend I might be of any use. I did try to marry, a long time ago, but that wasn't meant to be.

In any case, I have given myself to God, but God is surprisingly UNHELPFUL. You would think He would step up, but he doesn't.

Please pray that He becomes a little more responsive, as I am gradually losing hope, and fear I will lose my mind if I don't get some relief. Just say a quick prayer for me, if you would.

God save us all.
(c) Copyright 2018
Silver Rose Parnell