NEW DIRECTIONS

 

I have enjoyed writing my diary entries and publishing them here, but just like yesterdays newspaper that today is used to wrap the table scraps for disposal, this blog has grown stale. I have less news to share, as the days wear on, because I am doing nothing but meditating and praying, creating art works, and doing some housework on the side.

The book I began years ago has ALSO begun to accumulate some dust, and I am beginning to wonder if I have enough interest in it to finish it - but, more important, whether or not there is anything of sufficient value to put out into society.

Most pertinent, however, is the fact that I have lost most of my vision in my left eye. It is as if I am trying to gaze through a puddle of water. This makes it very difficult to see my work here. I am still able to type without looking at the keyboard, but peering at the computer screen has become a headache.

The time has come to order my life toward accommodating the loss of vision. Thanks be to God, I don't need my eyes to meditate or pray - but everything else has become more complicated.

It is possible I will start an entirely NEW blog with another focus. But I need to rest for a while first.

In the meantime, feel free to wander over to my Facebook page and we can chat there. If you have any meditation questions, I will be available for recommendations.

God bless us all.

Silver

Sannyasini Kaliprana

SAINT TANCA AND NATIONAL HANDBAG DAY

 

Today is one of those days on the calendar when the female saints are once again given short shrift. There is only one female saint among the handful of other saints and, as per usual, it is a young girl who died "protecting her virginity" and for whom that is all that is known except her name which, in this case, is Tanca. In fact, she is so obscure, I could not find a single painting pretending to represent her. So, the picture at the top of today's entry is of a really cute handbag, in celebration of National Handbag Day!

I would like to be able to say something wise or pithy about just why it is that there are so few women saints and why so many of the ones we DO know about died defending themselves from the importunities of men. I, myself, wish to know why - out of all the things that might be said about a person -THIS fact is what someone chose to remember about so many of these practically unknown saints.

Suddenly, I am reminded of how many times in my life men have taken credit for my creative process and my work. For instance:

When I was living in one of the Vedanta houses in Hollywood, just prior to joining the convent, I was put in charge of "All Gurus Day" which was sometimes known as "Fathers Day" and I did a huge amount of work, especially with my creation of a multi-media show. In addition to organizing and scripting the program, I created, completely from scratch, a beautiful slide show about the underlying influence of "The Unknown Saints among us," complete with a music score underneath it, which I linked to particular slides with the help of a machine that a borrowed from one of the Vedanta men who happened to have access to this equipment.

I wrote the script for this creation, engaged an actor, directed her voiceover performance, created the program for the other aspects of the event, and even created and printed the flyers advertising it. The theme for the show itself had been my creation. Indeed, the entire thing was my "baby."

It was a gorgeous show, very meaningful, with a peaceful vibe. It had been a huge amount of work over several weeks and I was happy with the result.

After the show was over, I was standing outside the temple next to the man from whom I had borrowed the equipment. As the audience came out of the temple, they automatically looked to HIM and congratulated HIM on the beautiful program! It was bad enough that these people gave this ancillary guy the credit, even though these people had SEEN me do the work, had all kinds of conversations with me about it, and to whom it should have been more than obvious who had created it. What really astonished me is that he took the credit, as if he HAD actually created it even though he did nothing! Incredible. I was so astonished, I just looked at him, wide-eyed, with my mouth agape, as one after another, people came out of the temple, turned to him, and praised him for the wonderful slide show. To this day, I am sure this guy, who did nothing but lend me some equipment, would tell you that he did it all.

Later, I created a Vedanta magazine that another man took from me, brought to a bunch of other men and it is being published to this day. Stealing the brainchild of a woman is nothing to them. It happens all the time.

This tendency of men to assume unto themselves all the credit for the work produced by, created by and inspired in the minds of women is infuriating. Humans have been civilized for thousands of years, yet the male of our species continues to act like the head of the chimpanzee troupe. Because men are typically physically stronger and bigger than the women, (and I suppose because of all the damn testosterone), they forcibly take all the prizes, earned or not, and then distribute the crumbs of the remainders to the women they automatically assume it is their right to dominate. It is one thing to be proud of one's own work, but to abrogate to oneself the creation of others is the height of arrogance - and this is more common than dirt.

If a woman dares to complain about any of this, she is fiercely admonished, her worth as a person attacked - and there are all sorts of derogatory names heaped on  her head. Men employ these mechanisms of shame to keep us in line because women WILL often hesitate to challenge the man when he takes the credit for her work. We are often more retiring and we hesitate to demand recognition. And we don't want to abase ourselves by whining about it. What was I going to say to those people who came out of the temple and thanked that guy for all the work I did? "Hey, congratulate me! I'm the one that did it!" How would THAT have sounded? Would I have had to have a fight outside the shrine of the Lord? No. It wasn't my temperament.

Coincidentally, in monastic life, I've noticed a decided propensity to lauding character traits that are more typical of traits that men possess over those of women. For instance, in the Hindu tradition, the giving up of jewelries and cosmetics is part of the process of taking sannyas - but since when are these things customary for a man to use in any case? The cutting off of all hair is another one of these rather convenient "sacrifices." Most men wear their hair short, and women tend to let theirs grow. A large percentage of men go bald as they age, something over which they have NO control. How convenient of them to attribute spiritual currency to the shaving of their heads! It costs a man next to nothing to shave his head, but in many societies it is considered a great humiliation (and is often meted out as a punishment) to cut the hair of a woman.

Likewise, women are usually more interested in the "nesting" aspects of life than men. Many of us are clever about equipping and decorating our homes. A great number of us have a bit of the Mary Poppins about us and carry a virtual drug store in our handbags, from which we dispense hand lotion, tissues, aspirins, combs, and a vast array of useful items for our families. 

So, when I notice that there are TONS more male saints than female saints, my experience with the male of the species tells me that THIS is not all there is to the story. I am quite sure that there are just as many female saints as there are male saints (maybe more), but the men push the women back into the corners and push themselves and their companions forward to take the praise and the prizes, which makes me far less interested in the male saints and also makes me suspicious of the wonderful characteristics attributed to them.

I could give several more examples of  how male traits are given all sorts of honorifics and feminine traits are disparaged, but I'm sure you don't need me to do that.

There are those who opine that monastic life isn't appropriate for women and there have even been some writers in the Eastern traditions who say that women who DO take up monastic life are really men after all. It's silly, I know, but I didn't create this situation. I mention this obscure text as another example of how it is assumed that being a man is so much better than being a woman. It is hogwash, of course.

I have to categorically state that I am not saying that all women are the same or that all men are the same or that the character traits I have attributed to some men or women apply to ALL men or women. I am not saying that. I would never say that sort of thing about any topic because there are ALWAYS exceptions that prove the rule in any topic concerning groups of people - in the same way I would never say that all Republicans feel, think, act and speak a certain way - or Democrats. Variety is not dead and we are not manufactured beings. I am just noting tendencies that occur in the vast number of cases - not all cases.

I'd love to say that I have a solution for all the societal ills to which I have alluded with regard to men taking all the credit and for pushing women down and so forth, but I don't. I have no idea what to do (if anything) about this situation. I'm just observing and reporting it.

But I do wish to say one thing. I would like to encourage women to avoid taking all the prejudicial treatment "on board." To whatever extent we are maligned and discounted, we owe it to ourselves to keep our hearts pure and unsullied by the negative traits assigned to us by the opposite sex. 

Hindu Holy Woman

In fact, this persistent degradation of women is so pervasive that women themselves will often malign others of their sex and perpetuate the negative stereotypes. I see this in the obsessional support Donald Trump has with a certain type of woman. They even look the same. Bleached blonde hair, false eyelashes, tight clothing, high heels, lots of makeup. I am not a psychiatrist, but I am sure a psychiatrist might have something to say about women who gush over a man who treats women like dirt, calls them vulgar names, and is especially hard on women who don't pump up the volume on their sex appeal.

So, I am winding back to "the unknown saints among us." I would like to send a message out to all my sisters in spirit. Please don't take it to heart. Don't buy into what the misogynists are saying about you. Remember that there are misogynists in BOTH camps and keep your own counsel. Don't pick yourself apart with self-loathing and bemoan how little like a man you are. True, we don't have a lot of role models to pattern ourselves after, but once you've done the best you can, take confidence in the fact that the Lord sees everything you do, say and think. He knows you in your innermost being and is acquainted with your best self. Hold onto that and ignore the constant slurs of an uneven, unfair and illogical society.

May we all be blessed.

Silver Rose

P.S. I was struggling before the pandemic hit. Now groceries are even more expensive than they were before, the dog needs to go to the vet for his yearly shots, my car has had no maintenance for several years, and the electric bill for a very hot summer was $200.00 EACH month! Please consider contributing to my Amazon donation list. They have my address and can mail to me directly.

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SAINT AUREA OF PARIS FEAST DAY - OCTOBER 4 - NOTES ON CONTEMPLATIVE MONASTIC LIFE

 

Relic of the saint in a decorative housing

Saint Aurea of Paris celebrates her feast day today, along with Saint Frances of Assisi and at least half a dozen other saints, all male, as far as I can tell. As you know, I am keen to make the female saints a bit better known than they are presently. Of course, there is only so much one can say about a saint for whom not much information has been passed down to us over time - not because they are any less saintly than other saints, no doubt, but because women just don't get much recognition in a church run entirely by men.

I used to make a joke out of this, saying that women are more naturally saintly, so that when a man lives a saintly life, that fact alone is a miracle! While humorous, I won't claim that it is true. I am just casting around for some reason besides the obvious - that women are not celebrated nearly as much as the men...for whatever reason.

Why does this matter? Everyone needs a source of inspiration, and I find nothing more inspiring than another woman living the Christian ideals most assiduously - especially monastic women, and CONTEMPLATIVES, since that is my path.

Saint Aurea of Paris

Of particular interest with regard to today's saint is that she died of the plague. Considering that we are currently beset with a modern day epidemic, we can certainly relate to what she must have been feeling, especially since 160 of her monastic sisters also died of it.

Saint Aurea was originally Syrian but relocated to Paris, France and was put in charge of St. Martial convent as Abbes by Saint Elegius in 633, where she ruled for 33 years (a number I find interesting because when our Lord died, HE was 33, I believe.)

Saint Elegius

(Sometimes called "Eloi")

I find Saint Elegius himself to be a most interesting person, having been a metalsmith, and this is an area that interests me. I am currently contemplating learning how to make punched tin frames for my religious paintings and am trying to calculate whether all the time and money will be worth doing it, since I have already lost the vision in my left eye and doctors anticipate that I will likely lose it in my right as well.

Saint Elegius was extremely gifted in many areas and is the patron saint of metalsmiths, craftspeople, horses, and is credited as a gifted spiritual teacher. Saint Godeberta was one of his pupils.

Interior of Saint Paul Saint Louis Church in Paris, France
Photo by David Iliff

License: CC BY-SA 3.0

The Saint Martial convent where Saint Aurea of Paris was Abess is no more. I offer you the following etching from 1850 which depicts a narrow impasse called the "Impasse Saint-Martial" which was all that remained of the Saint-Martial convent by 1850.

artist: 

Theodor Joseph Hubert Hoffbauer

(1839-1922)

It does make me a little sad to see how this convent that held such holy women, saints and martyrs to the faith, has just disappeared - eaten up, as it were, by the city of Paris. Over time, these holy institutions could not be maintained. In addition to the terrible EXPENSE, there is no longer the enthusiasm for it. The faithful don't feel inspired to support the monastic institutions as they once did because they no longer understand the absolute value of the spiritual work of men and women who have set themselves aside for the sole purpose of contemplation of the Divine and prayers for the faithful. Intercessory prayer isn't valued in the same way it once was.

In addition, from the other side of things, the monastics have been sullied by the corruption of a small number of priests who were predators of children, who snuck into the ranks of the holy ones, causing untold damage to innocents. The monolithic institution of "the church," in turn, did not deal with these predators in an appropriate way, which highlighted some degradation that had occurred in the church, over time.

You see, monastic life in the Christian tradition actually started out being mostly composed of independent hermit-type Christians who set themselves apart from society, initially going out into the dessert to live a penitential, solitary existence dedicated to prayer and ascetic practices. Later, hermits are found housing themselves in caves, such as in the fairy chimneys of Cappadocia, in present-day Turkey. In some countries, they retreated to the forest. 

Hot air balloons float over the caves of

former religious hermits

in the "fairy chimneys" of Cappadocia, Turkey

At times, a particularly holy person would attract followers who would cluster around them in their own hermitages. Various types of organization were employed. Things grew from there, and I suspect that at least a partial return to the earlier manifestation of independent monastics is more than due. The corruptions of monolithic institutions need to be addressed, at least in the West.

In the Catholic Church, the home of the Christian mystics and saints, there are STILL official "diocesan hermits" provided for in the canon, but it appears that the institution is loathe to confer that designation. As in other traditions, if you are willing to give a small fortune to The Church, it will quickly dispense with any impediment that it imagines for anyone else  who might approach it. Even so, as a Diocesan Hermit, you are not all that "independent" because every detail about your life has to be approved by the bishop. You can't blame them for wanting to be in control of anyone pretending to be a part of the official institution, though. Mentally unstable people are often attracted to extreme forms of religious expression, and it takes a lot of work to establish whether or not an individual is of sound mind. 

Hindu sannyasini - holy woman

at the Kumba Mehla celebration

There are many independent holy men and women who have taken sannyas in India. A great number belong to large institutions. Some merely belong to the tradition. My sannyas was an independent thing approved by my swami, who had hoped that I would open a Vedanta Center in Arizona, but which turned out to be more physically taxing than I would be able to endure. Plus, I would be living in what was, essentially, a very small but very public space that I would have to share with a male swami who would visit once every 4 to 6 weeks. The master bedroom was to be reserved for the visiting swami, and this reminder that I was to do all the work while the man got all the benefits was something I did not wish to revisit in my life.

It isn't that I don't like people, by the way. I like people too much, and it would have pulled my focus dangerously off-kilter. The swami knew this, however, and I don't think he was surprised when I ultimately declined his offer to open the center in Arizona. When I had left the Hollywood convent, he said to me, "who will smile at the devotees if you leave?" He knew my nature.

Hindu holy woman - Sannyasini (renunciate)

In American culture, the general lack of value placed on the contemplative path is unfortunate. Just the presence of a person who has dedicated themselves to this way of life has a positive effect on everyone who comes in contact with him or her. But I remember hearing from many of the devotees who frequented the Vedanta temple that there was a good deal of resentment against the monks and nuns because it appeared as if they lived a higher standard than the devotees. The devotees didn't have to live in close quarters under constant criticism and, while the housing appeared to be grand, it is well known in monastic circles that we could use all sorts of things but couldn't actually have anything. Bottom line? The grass is greener, as they say. (Personally, I was thrilled at the freedom that this granted me. It was a delight to only have 2 or 3 keys on my key ring and not to have to pay a single bill.)

Many people in my generation became enamored of the mystical, contemplative life of the Hindus that was made popular in the hippie era. What many of us did not know is that the Christian church has its OWN mystics that are just marvelous. There is nothing in the Christian Church that cannot be perceived through the meditative methods of Vedanta. God is ONE.

[NOTE: While I am  happy to look at Catholicism through the lens of Vedanta, some Hindus whose tradition I am co-opting by this are, at times, peeved by it. Out of respect for that point of view, I offer THIS LINK TO A "HINDUISM TODAY" ARTICLE about this topic. It appears to be mostly a problem for those in India who object to the perceived efforts on the part of the Catholic Church to convert Hindus to the faith by using their own images and traditions "against" them.]

Sign outside Bede Griffiths' Shantivanam Ashram

in India

Unfortunately, parish life in America, on the other hand, is rule-bound with little support for the contemplative perspective. Pedestrian matters of sex, family life, contraception and abortion grab most of the attention, unlike in the early days of the church. I pray that one day they strike a better balance.

It had been my intention, in the early days of my hermitage, that I would start a small Catholic ashram catering to like-minded people, but I was robbed of a promised inheritance that would have purchased the house, and my physical disabilities worsened and multiplied. It isn't out of the question for the future, but at 66 years old, I am fast running out of future. I DO hope that my writings encourage others to explore this life, however.

Like the Church of Saint Martial, which housed so many women and so much prayer then disappeared into nothingness, I am of a certain age when I contemplate my own demise and anticipate that I will likewise disappear without much fanfare. The prayer corner where I spend my hours speaking with the Lord will be partitioned and distributed among the faithful, a statue here, an icon there, a rosary somewhere else. None of these things are permanent. What IS permanent are my prayers and the vibrations of my conversations with and meditations on the Lord.

What I hope to leave behind is an appetite for the contemplative life, and it is my hope that other women will be inspired to live the vowed life at home, like their friend, the accidental hermit.

May we all be blessed!

Silver Rose

Sannyasini Kaliprana

P.S. Food has gotten more expensive during the Covid virus, on top of a food budget that was ALREADY very tight here. I've long ago reverted to a vegetarian diet, but would welcome some canned fish, if wild caught (mercury free.) There are other necessary items listed on my donation list on Amazon. They have my address and will mail to me direct. Check it out on my donation list, link below:

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SAINT HILTRUDE OF LIESSIES - COMMENTS ON MONASTIC LIFE

Saint Hiltrude of Liessies

Every day I endeavor to celebrate a female saint whose life is an inspiration to me in my capacity as a hermit, or what you might term a "recluse," such as today's Saint Hiltrude who spent her life dedicated to communing with the Lord while attached to the Benedictine monastery ruled by her brother, Gundrad.

It delights me to be able to celebrate someone whose name is remembered in the context of this type of vocation. A "sannyasini," which is my vowed path, is very similar to the hermit, and, as a type of shorthand, I refer to myself as such to Westerners. At heart, it is a contemplative path.

Each time a hermit is celebrated on our calendar, I feel inspired to encourage others who are thinking they may take to the path others of us have stepped upon. Many people feel the pull toward monastic life, but it has become very expensive to support nuns and monks in big institutions. Public support has lessened at the same time that the economy has made it cost prohibitive.  Unlike in the Middle Ages, the number and size of monasteries and convents has been drastically reduced. They have had to become more and more PICKY about who they accept. If you want to live as a monastic and you are not young, not rich, and perhaps not perfectly healthy, you won't typically be welcomed with open arms and may HAVE to "go it alone."

My comments and recommendations in this post, and in this blog, in general, are meant for the hermits who, by necessity, have to pursue this life entirely alone, without the assistance or support of an institution.

There are many names for a person who lives a monastic life in a somewhat solitary state: Hermit, Anchorite, Ascetic, Cenobite, Eremite, Monk, Nun, Solitary. None of these labels can be relied upon to adequately describe the journey each individual undertakes when they choose the monastic vocation because the vocation often chooses the person. Even when there is no institution that is able to entertain the idea of supporting this vocation in you, the Divine Tide moves the heart and accomplishes the life, nonetheless- so strong is the call of the spirit.

Me with my guru, Swami Swahanandaji,

when I was in the Vedanta Convent

Late 1980's

I have been encouraged by a number of spiritually advanced souls who recognized that the Lord prepared me for this life by allowing great difficulties to assail me throughout my time on earth, and that, through the blows of the little hammers of sorrows, pressures, losses, death, disease and disaster, the golden carapace - the armor with which the serious spiritual seeker is given the strength to deflect the evil we encounter on our way to God realization - has been formed. With it, we may eventually become somewhat impervious to the worldly temptations.

    

My friend, Roshi Prabhasa Dharma

1930-1999

In my monastic journey, I have been very fortunate to have enjoyed the friendship and counsel of spiritually advanced souls, such as my Vedantic monastic advisor, Swami Swahananda of the Vedanta Society of Southern California who directed my vows as a sannyasini; my friend, the Zen Buddhist Roshi Prabhasa Dharma, with whom I enjoyed many brilliant conversations; as well as the occasional perspective of Father Dennis at San Felipe de Neri Parish in Old Town, Albuquerque, who acted as my confessor on several occasions. Even dear Amma, the "hugging saint" has played a part in my journey, with her wise individual counsel, when she came to Santa Fe, years ago, and we discussed the arena of my monastic "work."

Mata Amritanandamayi "the hugging saint"

from the Ma Center Michigan newsletter

September 5, 2018 - Ann Arbor

It is my humble opinion that without the companionship and wise counsel of these saintly people, as well as the close association with other aspirants (good, bad and mediocre), I would not be fit for the job I undertook decades ago. I recommend heartily that if you aspire to the independent spiritual life, solicit input from people known to be spiritually advanced and psychologically sound. Not everyone is destined for this path, and it shouldn't be embarked upon without the hearty support of those who know what it entails and who are familiar enough with you to be able to give a recommendation.

On the other hand, you need to keep in mind that there will always be naysayers. The world is full of petty, jealous people who delight in criticizing and blockading the paths of others. Ignore the naysayers. Who are they to tell you that you cannot love God? Who are they to tell you that you may not seek the company of the Divine? Place your mind at the feet of God and ignore the words of those who try to discourage you.

Spiritual advisors should be confident in themselves and have a history of keeping their ego in check. Real humility, though rare, is definitely required in the character of the person who advises you, otherwise you run the risk of being undone by the covert, passive-aggressive machinations of the ego-impaired. 

My guru, Swami Swahananda

Just make sure that your spiritual advisor is more adept than you are and that you are picking him or her, not the other way around. In this arena, there seems to be no end of people who wish to push themselves and their unsolicited opinions on you. You'll recognize this when it happens and I trust you will politely decline their effort to direct you against your will.

When you do pick a teacher and he or she gives you advice you don't care to follow, you may comply anyway because you, yourself have chosen him as your teacher. Someone who has pushed themselves on you will be less successful in ensuring your cooperation and really helping you. There is a saying in Hindusm that "when the student is ready, the teacher appears." Just be on the lookout and do what you sense is best. It will work out. God is watching out for us, those who love Him. He knows us and will place us in the right hands, when all is said and done, so have no worries about any of this.

When contemplating monastic life, it wouldn't hurt to undergo some psychological counseling as part of your discernment process, especially if you are embarking on the path without benefit of institutional support. You don't have to find someone with a specialty in counseling people from a spiritual perspective. Monastic life is full of ordinary stressors that exact their price on the psyche, and you want to make sure you can handle it. Give yourself a little tune-up, as it were. I have done this over an extended period of time, and I can attest to its benefits.

Remember also that no one is perfect and none of us starts out as a saint. Take Saint Mary of Egypt as an example. She led a completely dissolute life for quite some time before coming to the Lord, leaving home at the age of 12 to pursue a life devoted to lust for 17 years before becoming converted. She thereafter retreated to the desert to live as a hermit the remainder of her days.

Saint Mary of Egypt

You do not have to have led a perfect life before taking the robes. You just need to be certain that the basic requirements of your vocation can be met without constant inner turmoil. On occasion, you will be beset by petty temptations. You just need to be confident that you can put these aside, much as you put aside distracting thoughts that pop up in the mind while you meditate.

I remember, with great sadness, a woman who appeared, at first glance, to have the ideal temperament for a mystic but she was entirely undone by a male pursuer. For our purposes, we will call her "Durga." She was in the convent at the time. Her love of God appeared to be intense, but it was her misfortune that she was both extremely pretty and had a lovely speaking voice. Her mannerisms were a little too dramatic and, at times, laughable. I remember her breathy speaking voice, combined with the actual batting of eyelashes! She was a walking, talking cliche of the delicate maiden nun. You could almost hear the musical soundtrack behind her - like a movie from the 1940's. One day, a man appeared out of nowhere, as it were, began to worship her, throwing himself at her feet and proclaiming that she was a "Goddess." Her overly romanticized ego was her downfall. She ended up working the streets to support his heroin habit.

It is always better to have detractors than flatterers in this life. Some nuns have gone to extremes to make themselves less attractive, and I don't usually recommend it, but perhaps they know something about themselves the rest of us don't. I would just say that all of us females need to remember the cautionary tale of Durga that I've given you, above. Don't entertain too many romantic notions about yourself. If you are one of these people that is susceptible to the blandishments of a man who appears to have fallen hard for your charms, don't take to this life, as it will ruin you as surely as it ruined dear Durga.

San Felipe de Neri Parish Church

Copyright © 2005 - Silver S. Parnell

No use or copying for any purpose.

The lessons gleaned from my association with holy souls that hailed from widely disparate religious traditions have been remarkably similar. Meditation and monastic practice are common to all three of these great religions: Hindu, Buddhist and Catholic Christian. All of these monastic traditions sit upon some version of the three-legged stool of poverty, chastity and obedience. The stool may appear to be different, if the color and decoration vary, but the basis is that of a three-legged seat that supports our spiritual undertaking.

A recluse often follows their own program when they choose this occupation, as far as the specific practices are concerned, although there are certainly some institutions that prescribe extensive rules of life for hermits who live under the umbrella of an establishment. But it seems to me, in my reading of the known persons who lived as I do, that the expression of the ideal finds its own peculiar manifestation, based upon the personality and gifts of each person. I do recommend studying the Catholics and their manner of doing this. They've codified everything over the last 2,000 years, and it can be helpful to you.

Retiring to a property outside of town may not be possible for you - particularly if you are physically disabled and going blind, as in my case. We all have to do the best we are able, given our circumstances. Typically, it is only those who are part of rich institutions who can afford all that great churchy ambiance. Every inch of land is owned by someone in America, and you can't just place yourself anywhere you like. If you have to live in an apartment, surrounded by people on all sides, then this is all that the Lord has provided for you, and you must be grateful for it. Do what you can, where you can. Ultimately, what is really important is the condition of your mind. On what does it naturally incline itself? Only you know the answer to that question, since it is entirely "an inside job."

Hermit caves of Cappadocia

The overarching requirement, of course, is that one is single, that is unmarried and unpartnered. The word "monastic" is based on "mono" which refers to "one" or "singular," in regard to the instant topic. No matter the religious tradition or the expected method of adherence to the practices of poverty, chastity and obedience, the first and absolutely necessary aspect is the singularity of the work. Married life, lived in the bosom of the family with children around one's ankles, can be a highly elevated state through which one is sanctified, but it isn't monastic life. One needs to be clear about one's suitability. Occasionally, it is apparent from youth, but many people who take to this state have previously tried other modes of life, and there is nothing wrong with that. In the history of some Eastern cultures, householders were encouraged to have a few children, raise them, and, when they had grown, the mother and father would "take to the forest" and become hermits together.

There is something to be said for the force that habit may have upon a person. This is one of the reasons why the Catholics want their nuns young, but part of this equation is that they wish to make use of them while they still have their health. It isn't for the sake of the young nun. It's for the utilitarian needs of the institution.

Poverty is usually the easiest leg of the monastic 3-legged stool. Unless you've inherited a great deal of money or worked and saved it, poverty visits you without much invitation. In the monastic life, "chastity" requires that you be unmarried, unattached, and sexually pure. As far as "obedience" is concerned, unless the recluse is living under the aegis of a particular institution, general obedience to one's religion and its requirements is the only sort one can really have.

There are those who imagine that being a hermit or an anchorite has some sort of status attached to it and, because of this, people who are involved in romantic or sexual relationships, sometimes present themselves as a religious recluse, despite being unfit in the most essential requirement of singularity. There is at least one woman I know of who advertises herself online as an "anchoress" but is married and lives with husband and children. It is a sham. I have seen a few of these, but the reality of their lives is obvious for all to see, and no great harm is done, probably. Perhaps one day they will actually move toward an authentic expression, and leave the convoluted pretense behind.

Why does one choose this kind of life? Ideally, the desire for union with the Lord is the primary incentive. Some who are invested in intercessory prayer may want to help mankind thereby. Everyone has their own special vision as to how they will work this out. I applaud them all, as long as they don't create institutions that purport to be part of a particular established religion, there is no harm in any of it, I imagine.

I remember feeling pulled toward the contemplative practices just prior to when I found the Vedanta Society. For a long time, I had been yearning for a meditation practice that would put me more in tune with the Divine. I used to have a large walk-in closet where I go and sit in a corner with the lights off, close the door, and adjust myself to the right vibrational level. The experience was exquisite and inspired me to find others of like mind, which is what I did - and this was the beginning of my serious contemplative practice.

Spiritual practice is so enjoyable, I wonder why more people don't embark on a life devoted to prayer and meditation. On the other hand, many people have remarked to me that they don't understand why anyone would willingly give up the many pleasures of life to do it. To each his own, right?

Remember, though, that meditation, prayer, fasting and other ascetic practices are a means to an end and not an end in themselves. Some people are able to deny themselves nearly everything that a human requires, and others are more ordinary in their capacity for suffering. I, myself, have constant chronic pain to offer up. We each have to be true to what is natural to us and not try to be too grand about it all. The result is the key - not the method by which we obtain it. Each of us knows what our acetic practices cost us in discomfort.

If any of my readers have a serious desire for a life lived closer to God and you'd like to talk with me about it, feel free to register a comment on this blog post. I won't publish it, unless you want me to. But I will answer any question you might have for me. It is a delight to occasionally share correspondence with others of like mind. I look forward to hearing from you.

In the meantime, may God bless us all!

Silver Rose

"Sannyasini Kaliprana"

P.S. Due to COVID, food has gotten astronomically expensive. I was ALREADY having trouble meeting all my bills, and I have to take my dog to the vet very soon for shots and tests. Please consider contributing to my food and supplement wish list. (A few items for the dog are on there as well.) AMAZON HAS MY ADDRESS AND WILL MAIL TO ME DIRECTLY:

CLICK HERE TO GO TO AMAZON WISH LIST FOR FOOD AND SUPPLEMENTS

CORPORATE THINK IS TOXIC TO HUMANS

"Ghost Tree"

Copyright © 2020, Silver Parnell

All rights reserved.

Throughout my life, I have instinctively avoided interactions with large corporate structures, both at work and at home. Nearly all of my jobs, except for when I wrote for television, were in small businesses. Whenever I rented an apartment I tried to rent only from individuals who had a few properties. I did not want to become enmeshed in systems that I sensed weren't healthy.

The Hindus would say that my attraction to light and health was a natural orientation to the sattvic realms. Even though the salary and the benefits weren't quite as good as what the large businesses offered, I had a sense of dread when I contemplated working for big business.

In my youth, I could not have told you exactly why I was inclined in this direction, because it was an intuitive thing, but now that I've got a lot of years (and experiences) under my belt, I've realized just why.

The entire operating principles behind big business are calculated to maximize the most profits for the fewest people. These organizations rely upon being able to capitalize on the work of a large number of people in order to shove all the profit to the top handful of decision makers. Meanwhile, most of the wage earners barely make enough to put a roof over their heads and food on the table.

American corporations took their inspiration from a plantation mindset. It IS "the American way" to take advantage of people who lack resources by enslaving them in a system that capitalizes on their value and misappropriates it to the benefit of the tiny ruling class.

Even the customers or clients that these big organizations are supposed to be served are NOT served by them at all. Let me explain:

Because a corporation is an anonymous, faceless thing, it has no ethical restraints and no conscience. Employing tricks, such as 'bait and switch' and making clients 'buy a pig in a poke' because the business hasn't informed them of crucial facts surrounding their purchase of goods or services, is quite common. Because the dictum from on high is always to squeeze the most profits possible from the enterprise,the lengths to which these companies will go in meeting that guiding standard has no limits.

In small business, however, even if the paradigm is similar, the human being in charge of the place is usually visible, knowable, reachable, and can be reasoned with (theoretically.)

Unfortunately, corporation mind think has become so prevalent that it has become nearly impossible to operate in this culture without involving oneself in it. This week, I have had a number of run-ins with toxic corporate culture, and there is little to nothing that I can do about it.

I am an expert genealogist and have a family tree of more than 70,000 people in it. I have been working on it since 1978, and there are thousands of hard hours invested. There was no internet in 1978. In order to gather documents and photos, I had to pound the pavement, go to libraries, watch hours and hours of microfilm and microfiche, and physically get down into the work of digging out the facts behind ancestors lives.

Mistakenly, I believed that when the Mormon site "Family Search" said that by using their site, my tree would be "public," it meant the same thing that typically comes to mind, and the same thing that Ancestry.com means by the term. "Public," to me, meant that my tree would be viewed by the public. INSTEAD, this group of wackos has decided that "public" means that my tree belongs to them, that I can never remove it from their site, and that anyone and everyone who registers with them can make changes to the tree I spent YEARS creating.

"You AGREED that your tree was public," the woman intoned, in a smarmy, smug sort of monotone. I had clearly bought a pig in a poke. They had deliberately hidden the reality of the situation in a dense bit of legalese that even I, a person with years of experience in legal contracts, did not perceive. I tried to reason with the woman, but reason has no place in corporate mind control. The woman just kept repeating the same excuse. This is the way it is because we decided that this is the way it is.

I went to report them to the Better Business Bureau and discovered that the Mormon site "Family Search" ALREADY has an "F" rating because there have been at least three prior complaints about them, and the organization didn't even bother to ANSWER the complaints.

Corporations do not care about reputation. Corporations have no shame - even when that corporation is manned by people who claim to have an ethical life.

The Mormons used to have my respect. While I thought their theology was nutty, I appreciated that most of the Mormons I had met were very ethical and kind people. But even customarily good people are stripped of their ethical souls when they cooperate in the corporate mind.

I went ahead and filed a complaint with the Better Business Bureau, but I don't expect to prevail because the Mormons will likely just ignore my complaint, as they have ignored all the others. This type of business isn't regulated, and if you have a dispute about a contract, you basically have to sue the company. Who has the money for that?

The only thing I can do is something that will help other people, which is to warn everyone away from using that site.  Doing something that will inhibit their ability to con other people is the only thing that might have any effect on the corporate mind. In other words, only a threat to the underlying principle of maximizing profits might work to get them from sitting on me and impinging on my copyright.

I had an experience with Amazon that wasn't as personally devastating, but was still annoying, to say the least. I purchased an item on which they offered payments "once a month," but it wasn't until AFTER they had already shipped the item that they sent me an email outlining a payment schedule that was once every 30 days, so that the payment date shifted every month, from the 3rd, to the 2nd, to the 1st! Obviously, most months have 31 days - not 30. I get paid on the 3rd, so there is at least one month where my one and only check has to take a "hit" for two payments, rather than one.

The Amazon people were no more helpful than the Mormons. "This is the way it is because this is the way it is," is what one is ALWAYS told, in essence. The arbitrariness of the corporate mind can't be argued with - because it is NOT HUMAN. After I discontinued the "chat" with the Amazon agent, she went in and cancelled one of my OTHER orders, then sent me an email about that other order. I don't know if she did it in retaliation for my having been upset or what. I had to RE-order that item, then call the company AGAIN and speak to yet another agent. He wasn't able to change the payment program, but he did promise to report the previous agent, which doesn't actually help me at all.

Yesterday, I received a generic email from Consumer Cellular, a terrible telephone company that drops nearly every call I get, sends me my voice mail messages a MONTH after someone leaves one and produces text messages DAYS after they are sent by friends. The email advised me that the 3G phone I JUST purchased from them will no longer be able to be used because they are changing their service. Only 4G and 5G will be accommodated. They obviously knew this for a long time before I bought that phone from them, but they didn't advise me. NO SHAME.

I was already planning to go to T-Mobile, as my research had indicated that theirs was the most reliable service at my location, as soon as I got paid, so I spent a good 40 minutes setting up a new phone service, including a credit check and all that entails. It wasn't until the END of that long experience that the woman told me she was charging me $20.00 to set up my account and another $10.00 to pay for the SIM card. I told her I wasn't going to be activating my account for a week or 10 days. She indicated that as along as I activated within 14 days, I would be fine.

What happened? I got an email this morning from T-Mobile telling me that my account has been activated! It included information on how to get the phone up and working. I don't even have the SIM card yet! I had to call the company AGAIN and complain.

The reason why they activate your phone service before you are even able to USE it is so they can charge you for time that you don't use. Again - NO ETHICS.

In this case, I was able to get them to DE-activate the account until I decide to activate it. The agent, as is the case with SO many agents in these corporations, barely spoke English. Likely, she was sitting at a phone bank in some other country where labor is even cheaper than America. Every time she asked me a question, I would try to answer and she would interrupt me and start talking, even when she was asking me for information to verify my identity. Then, of course, she didn't hear my answer because she was too busy talking. Even after I asked her to stop and just let me answer her, she continued to do it. I think it may have something to do with a cultural difference in the pace of conversation.

On the other hand, I've noticed that Americans often can''t be bothered to wait for me to finish a sentence before they're talking over me. This happened when I called JoAnn Fabrics a couple days ago. When I objected, she said that there were only two people in the shop, and of course I understand this. When the underlying dictum is to squeeze as much money out of the business as is possible, there are never enough workers. Corporate mind requires that there never be enough employees to actually do the job well. Quality is always sacrificed when the corporate decree is operational.

In addition, the corporate conglomerate has formed into an interconnected thing. It forces consumers to continue to "upgrade" their services and equipment because they make it mandatory in order for the customer to FUNCTION. For example, I purchased some Rit Dye from JoAnn Fabrics online web page for a clothing project a few months ago. The sale price was only good for a "pick up" order, so after I ordered and paid for the dye, I called the store to make sure it was ready for me before I trekked all the way out there [My disabilities make it extremely difficult for me to get out and about. Energy has to be conserved.]

In the course of the conversation, the JoAnn employee informed me that they would NOT release my purchases to me because, even though I have several forms of picture identification, including a current New Mexico Drivers License, as well as a PASSPORT, they would only let me have my purchases if I presented them with a copy of the email they sent me confirming my purchase. Since I had neither a cell phone nor a printer at that time, I could not show them the email on my phone, and I could not print it out either! Nor would they give me my money back! I had to wait 4 days until the temporary hold for the funds had dropped off my bank's radar, after which I could not find that color of dye ANYWHERE. Every once in a while, I check around to see if I can find it, with no luck.

Before the internet, I used to be able to call a store, find out if they had an item, have the proprietor hold the item for me, and go in and get it.

The corporate mind typically ignores what the client may want or need. Arbitrary changes to the Facebook platform and now Google Blogger have me tearing out my hair. BOTH of these companies have decided to fiddle with their platform, making changes that none of us really wants. It appears that they have changed it to be more like all the other sites that cater to people who bury their noses in their phones all day.

Before long, none but the most talented computer geek will be able to make sense out of the internet or use it for anything but the most basic search functions geared toward leading people to corporations that want to sell us stuff.

I would say that we should fight the corporate mind, but I don't know how one could do that, aside from maintaining mindfulness and taking proper care of our mental hygiene. I am just going to try not to use corporate services any more than I have to - but what can I do? I am disabled and mostly home bound. I need a phone. I need to order groceries and other necessaries to be delivered to me. Everywhere I turn, I am being forced into service to the corporate mind after a lifetime of avoiding it.

The changes to this platform - "Blogger" - will force me to use it less and less. The changes to Facebook will likewise repel me. While I have enjoyed making contact with a wider group of people throughout the world, I am afraid that it is becoming so klunky and difficult to navigate that it is no longer something I want to do, since I am not interested in being one of those people whose nose is always pressed against my telephone screen.

This reminds me of something that happened during my last surgery at University of New Mexico Hospital. I WOKE UP DURING SURGERY to find that the anesthesiologist was reading his email. I told him, "Hey! I'm awake! Get off your phone and put me back to sleep!" Without even looking at me or moving his face away from his phone, he extended his hand to a lever somewhere out of my sight, and I went under again.

Years from now, when history books recount about how the internet got broken, something about the corporate mind will be blamed.

I remember now how very happy I was when I joined the Vedanta Convent and only had 3 keys on my key ring. I didn't have to pay any bills. I didn't have to own a car. We had two of them in the garage. The downside of being independent is wrestling with the corporate mind and being enslaved to it, due to the necessities of disabilities. Every state of life has a price.

God bless us all.

Silver "Rose" Parnell
(Sannyasini Kaliprana)

Copyright © 2020, Silver Parnell
All rights reserved.

GOOD TROUBLE HAS CONSEQUENCES

In the background of all my days is the Covid-19 pandemic, but that isn't the first thing I think of when I wake up. I think of the nutty, conspiracy theory fueled, abusive authoritarian regime that has captured our government. It has scary implications for a poor disabled old lady who is going blind and has no power, except the power of my mind and my prayers....which is not "my" power at all, but the power of The Divine.

Hitler had his brown shirts. Trump has his white supremacists, Boogaloo Bois, neo-Nazis, Q-Anon conspiracy theorists, and pseudo militia men, tricked out in full camo and loaded assault rifles, who are now taking the law into their own hands and are murdering citizens who have the gall to protest the killings of black citizens by a trigger-happy, militarized police force.

The dangerously escalating situation started when a black man, George Floyd, was murdered by four policemen in broad daylight, on a city street, in full view of many witnesses, and memorialized by several videos.

While the prone, defenseless, unarmed and restrained citizen pleaded that he could not breathe and begged for his mother, one of the police officers, the murderer, pressed his knee into George Floyd's neck while the other police held him down. Onlookers can be heard on the videotape, trying to intervene, but the police officers spent a good six minutes strangling him. The cold, bloodless look on the face of the murderer is eerie.

Protests started to break out in response. It certainly wasn't the first black American to be murdered by police, but enough people had finally had enough of this travesty that they were willing to risk their own lives to protest with an eye to change.

The response of Trump, the police and the right wing "law and order" crowd was to kill more people and assault the peaceful protesters with gas, rubber bullets, and clubs.

Online, the right wing was complaining, not about the citizens who had been murdered in the street by the police that were supposed to protect them, but the tiny percentage of looting and violence that was occurring. This is typical of the alt right talking heads. They ignore the main issue and get it lost in the weeds of much less evident side issues. This is how the conspiracy theorists operate, as well. If they can find ONE instance of something happening, they blow it up to such an extent that, in their minds, at least, it becomes true for a massive number of people. It isn't truth, but they don't care about truth. They care about force and punishment, even if they have to manufacture an issue that they can then stomp on.

The response of Trump's administration and the right wing lie machine was to (1) express outrage against the protesters instead of the police who murder citizens on the street; and (2) express approval and encouragement for armed white supremacists to take the law into their own hands and come to the protests with loaded weapons to, supposedly, "protect property," but all I saw were pitched battles between them and protesters, initiated by the quasi-military goons who had taken it upon themselves to establish "law and order."

The response of the police was to (1) kill MORE black citizens; and (2) collude with the white supremacists so they would come in large numbers, bristling with weapons.

The protesters, seeing that there was no attempt to address the issues of racism and human rights abuses, but that, instead, the establishment had doubled-down, became enraged. (Who could blame them?)

Most recently, part of a group of white supremacists, a 17 year-old proudly came to a protest with an assault rifle and killed two protesters, after which he approached the police, who basically patted him on the head and sent him home. (You can well imagine if the kid had been black and had approached the police with an AR-15 slung around his neck, after killing two citizens. They would have shot him dead where he stood.)

Shortly thereafter, police can be heard thanking the armed civilians for coming out that night.

There is video and audio of all of this, and I have seen most of it.

Witnessing some of the recent murders of citizens by police, vis-a-vis video and audio tape taken by bystanders with their cell phones, had actually made me sick to my stomach.

The pandemic, a despotic fascist dictatorship, and the string of abuses against people of color, women, minorities, disabled folk, seniors, and anyone deemed too "different" to be allowed to live, is horrifying. This is not the America that the world has counted on to do the right thing. Starting with the kidnap and incarceration of babies and children at the border, we became the bad guys. I have cried every day since this started.

I have always been nonviolent. I have subscribed to Martin Luther King Jr.'s philosophy of nonviolent protest and resistance since I was a little girl. In response to the blood bath on the Edmund Pettus Bridge in which John Lewis, of blessed memory, was savaged and nearly killed, I participated in a protest march in the streets of Carmel, California. But now, since becoming old, disabled and nearly blind, I can't even do that. All I can do is meditate, pray and advise.

I admit that I sometimes feel demoralized and overwhelmed by the sheer volume of amoral, abusive language spewing out of Trump, but when I put my mind at the feet of the Lord, the way is clear. I have to continue to advocate for the vulnerable and the weak, even though I myself belong to those categories.

In Proverbs, there is a commandment to kings which I believe Jesus would agree that we follow:

Open your mouth for the dumb,

for the rights of all the unfortunate.

Open your mouth, judge righteously,

and defend the rights of the afflicted and needy.

~ Proverb 31:8

Although I have not taken to the streets to protest, I have suffered reprisals for my words of protest. I used to have supporters, in my parish and here, online, who were helping me with small gifts and gestures of kindness. One of them bought me a reclining chair when mine broke, so that I would have something on which to sleep. (I can't sleep lying down.) Another gave me a couch she had inherited. A group of them took me to lunch or tea on my birthday - but because I advocate for the weak, the vulnerable and the marginalized, and because I call out Trump and the lies of the right wing, they all, (except one) called me "hateful" and shunned me. They blocked me on Facebook and never spoke to me again.

The last time I was able to go to church and actually sit through mass, I happened to encounter one of them in the hallway. She glowered at me ferociously, lifted her nose in the air, turned her back to me, and stomped out the door.

Another supporter, a woman in IRELAND, of all places, had somehow become a Trump enthusiast. She had been trying to help me find a decent place to live that would be helpful when I lose more of my vision, but she also sent me an angry screed.

The assistance of my "Christian" family has always been welcome, especially since my father's will had been changed after he got dementia, and I was written out. (Typical family greed. He subsequently died under very suspicious circumstances, and I didn't know he had passed away until his body had been cremated, destroying the evidence.)

It is ironic that I left the Hindu convent because of the lack of love exhibited by the people in that faith, only to find that Christians are, for the most part, no better. Just because they claim to follow the God of love, doesn't mean they actually DO. A good portion of them don't even advocate for Christian love and fellow-feeling, opting instead for the dark side of resentment, grievances, force and punishment. The few who actually follow Christ are a beacon of light to me, and I thank God for them daily.

I mention all of this because I want you all to know that there is a cost to advocating for truth and justice! I am not just "blowing hot air" because the internet enables me and it is therefore easy to get my opinion published. I have suffered and continue to suffer retaliation for my advocacy - so when I ask you to do the same, you understand that I am also paying a high price.

I offer up my prayers today for all who need them, especially for the black community that has endured so much for so many years, and I pray that they continue to protest without undertaking violence. I recommend the same to the rest of you, as well.

May God bless you all.

Silver Parnell
(Sannyasini Kaliprana)
Copyright © 2020 Silver Parnell
All rights reserved.

THE SUN STILL SHINES

"Rainbow in the Trees"

Photo taken by Silver Parnell

Copyright © 2020, all rights reserved

The real advantage of having had a wonderful spiritual teacher in one's life is that, if you've spent enough time with them, you can pretty much anticipate what their advice would be, even if they've died long ago.

My teacher, who was somewhat of a father to me, would brush off the recent political news. He would say that history is like this and that men have always broken laws and subjected people to tyrannical rule. The overbearing cruelty that is common with dictators isn't unique to Trump. Few people will escape. Once we have done what we can do, spiritual life remains the same. "Meditation, prayer, eating and drinking - all of these things still go on," he would say.

He was a practical man and, during this difficult time, I appreciate his practical example more than ever. Every day, he stuck to the same schedule, no matter what was going on around him. To be clear, he did have a lot of people attending to his needs. I don't think he ever had do any manual work like cleaning his own room or cooking a meal. But no matter how he was feeling, he stuck to his meditation and prayer routines. He attended the expected events, no matter how bored he might be by them or how pathetic was our rendering of the Sanskrit chants. (It must have sounded harsh and grating to his ear.)

It is both soothing and inspiring to conjure up Swami Swahananda in my mind and have a virtual conversation with him about the dictator that has suddenly come to power in my country and how this has affected me and most of my friends, as well as all the other difficulties that have arisen with my disabilities, chronic pain and looming blindness. I can feel the tension melt away, and it is much easier to just stick to my schedule, as much as I have one, and proceed.

Between this post and the last one, I have gained and lost another attendant. This one, although her work was excellent, was socializing in groups of hundreds of people in close quarters without masks. She belongs to a local big box protestant prosperity-gospel church where most of the people don't practice good Covid hygiene because they mistakenly believe that, because they are very good Christians, the Lord is going to protect them and He won't let them get sick with the virus. So, hundreds of people gather on Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights, in close quarters, doing everything we are told NOT to do.

The agency that provided this woman immediately understood my concern and, in fact, they told me that, with the exception of people who had hired relatives to care for them, none of their other clients were availing themselves of their services during the pandemic. I resolved that I would try to also avoid it as long as possible. My apartment may be in chaos, but at least I will probably live to see the day when the virus is more under control.

In the meantime, meditation, prayer, eating and sleeping all go on.

Silver Parnell
(Sannyasini Kaliprana)
Copyright © 2020, All rights reserved

P.S. Getting food into the house is still an issue. Please do what you can to help. Amazon has my address and will mail to me directly. JUST CLICK THIS LINK FOR MY AMAZON WISH LIST

IF TRUMP GETS ANOTHER TERM, I MAY BECOME HOMELESS

Although I have worked for more than 30 years, and paid into Social Security through my employers AND my employers have matched my payments with payments of their own, I just found out from prominent professional historian Heather Cox Richardson that Trump's continuation of his "payroll tax cut" will eliminate my Social Security income by mid 2023...less than three years from now.

She cites the data of Chief Social Security Actuary Stephen C. Goss who "crunched the numbers" of Trump's payroll tax cut scheme and discovered that Trump's plan would end Disability Insurance in mid 2021 - a year from now - and Social Security by mid-2023 - which is three years from now. Social Security will be gone ENTIRELY.

The payroll taxes Trump wants to cut are the taxes that provide the money that funds Social Security and Disability insurance. DON'T KID YOURSELF that it will only cut it back a little bit or that it "wont be that bad." Social Security will be dead and gone in 2023 if Trump has his way, and seniors living on their Social Security insurance payments will have no income at all.

For information about the Chief Social Security Actuary, his bona fides, responsibilities and other descriptions of his functions at the Social Security Administration,

see: THIS WEB PAGE

I have multiple physical illnesses and syndromes that affect my ability to walk and to stand. I am also going blind and have lost most of the vision in my left eye already. I have no family in my life, to speak of, except for some distant cousins I found through my genealogy research. My only income is Social Security insurance, into which I paid for more than 30 years.  If I were to lose it, I really don't know where I could live. I represent a large demographic of seniors.

Because of my meditation and other spiritual disciplines, I'll probably get through this final phase of my life without going mad, but I still don't know if I could survive any homelessness at this late stage, with as many physical disabilities as I've been dealt.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING, and the reason why I write blogs like this one, is to inform the public about what is happening to a broad swath of American citizens. There are millions of seniors in the same or similar situation  as I am - relying completely upon their Social Security insurance payments in order to survive. Some may have relatives with whom they can live - but many DON'T. Even if a relative could take them in, most people don't have an extra bedroom. Grandma might have to camp out on the couch. And who can afford to absorb all of the living expenses, food, medicine and medical bills, for another adult person?

After a lifetime of being contributing members of society, dumping America's seniors on the street isn't a fitting reward.

Donald Trump was handed a thriving economy that was on the upswing, but like all the businesses that he drove into the ground and bankrupted, he has destroyed our economy by his refusal to address the pandemic, claiming that it was a "Democrat Hoax" because they were "overreacting" in order to make him look bad. For the longest time, he mischaracterized it. He called it a "flu." He said it would disappear, "like a miracle." He said that the warm weather of summer would kill it. He posited that ultra violet light somehow inserted in the body would kill it. At one point, swallowing bleach was his thing. Recently, he lauded a woman peddling discredited cures with a malaria medication - the same woman who can be seen in numerous videos, screeching at crowds inside carnival-style tents, that illness is caused by having sex with demons in your sleep!

Before Obama left office, he had created a pandemic response team and protocols. Experts had warned that a pandemic was on its way, so the Obama administration put all these things in place. They tried to brief Trump but he wasn't interested. Instead, he disbanded the pandemic response team and the measures that had been put in place.

Even before the virus hit our shores, Trump's tax cuts for the wealthy increased the income disparity gap that already rivaled the worst third-world dictatorships. Although promising to protect Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid, his administration has continually attempted to make cuts while hacking away at the Affordable Care Act - continuing to do so, even in the midst of the pandemic!

When he was in business, Trump was famous for cheating "the little guy." All these subcontractors would do the actual work of building some luxury resort or golf course or hotel, and he would just refuse to pay them. They'd have to sue him, but he would sell the building or resort and then declare bankruptcy of the business through which he operated to build it. The working man and woman have always been used by Trump to further enrich himself undeservedly. He is still doing it, though on a larger stage.

The question to ask yourself after reading this is whether or not you'd be happy to have millions of grandmas and grandpas living on the street so that Trump and the other one-percenters can become more wealthy. Also, do you ever plan to retire? What would YOU do without any income from Social Security when you retire or, God forbid, become disabled?

If we don't vote Trump out of office, life for grandma and grandpa is going to be more grim than it already is. Please don't let that happen. Vote for Joe Biden. He is not perfect. No one is. But at least he doesn't want to kill grandma and grandpa. That's a good start.

If, after reading this, you discount the estimation of the Chief Actuary of Social Security, please tell me who it is you believe would have better information about Social Security than HE does.

While deciding, may you all be blessed.

Silver Parnell
(Sannyasini Kaliprana)
Copyright © 2020 Silver Samantha Parnell
All rights reserved.

LYING IS MORE DIFFICULT IN THE ERA OF COMPUTERS AND CELL PHONES

Last night, after writing my diary entry for the day, I received an email from the housekeeper who had not shown up. She claimed to have had a car accident on the way to my house and that she couldn't call me because she left her phone in the car and her son couldn't get to it...blah blah blah.

Oh, and by the way, her doctors want her to take a few days off.

First of all, all she had to do was have someone look up the phone number of the agency on the nearest computer or phone and then call them. She didn't need her phone to do it. Information is everywhere in the era of the internet.

Secondly, I remember her telling me that her daughter was due to have a baby any day, and I am willing to bet the $24 left in my bank account that the baby was born, or she had an accident because she was drunk (she was slurring her words when we spoke on Sunday), or - most likely, she found an agency that paid more money and she couldn't call during that entire day because she was working SOMEWHERE ELSE!

I wanted to give her a chance to prove me wrong, so I told her I would believe her if she provided me with a doctors note, in response to which she gave me some word salad that conveyed no information and ignored the request for a doctor's note:

"My employer was the first to know and the baby wasn't born thank you."

The agency tells me they didn't speak to her. There is no doctor letter, and they don't expect one. They won't be using her again, and she won't get a recommendation from them.

This reminds me of the numerous times in the last 5 or 10 years that someone has told me, "I tried to reach you, but you didn't answer the phone," and there is no record of receiving a phone call from them. Somehow, dishonest people "forget" that cell phones keep track of every bit of data going in and out over the airwaves. Whoever calls me, whether I speak to them or not, there is a record of that call.

Just yesterday, a service person claimed to have called me, but they didn't leave a phone message and there is no record of them calling me in my phone history. Why didn't they leave a message, if they were truly "trying to reach" me? Because they did not "try to reach me" at all. They were lying.

Lying has become a habit, but a dangerous one, if you care about your immortal soul, as some religous people claim.

"You are of your father the devil, and you want to 

do the desires of your father. He was a murderer 

from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth

because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks

a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar

and the father of lies."

~ John 8:44

Another housekeeper has shown up and is now, at the moment I type this, working diligently on cleaning the kitchen and doing the dishes. She had to get here on the bus, but fortunately she doesn't live far from me.

When I told the new housekeeper about the gal that didn't show up yesterday, after telling me how devoted she was to her clients and how she was available to them "24/7" she piped up and said, "which means 'I won't be seein' ya." THIS gal has potential.

Silver Rose
(Sannyasini Kaliprana)
Copyright © 2020, Silver S. Parnell, All rights reserved.