EVERYTHING IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND YOU SHOULD SUFFER FOR IT

Taking a hot air balloon ride is romantic in the minds of some, but they can be dangerous at times. They may not be as dangerous as driving the Los Angeles freeways, but accidents do happen. More than a dozen years ago, a balloon owned by a small private company met up with some unfriendly winds and dumped some tourists out of the gondola and onto the tarmac at Kirtland Air Force Base. At least one person died.

One of the people injured in that accident was a friend of mine, an elderly lady with an adventurous heart who has undergone quite a few surgeries and continues to suffer from serious chronic pain and other issues as a result of that horrible accident.

Recently, she told me that a friend of hers is blaming her for getting onto the hot air ride to begin with, and this "friend" has no sympathy for her. Evidently, according to that friend, the accident is all her fault and she deserves to undergo years and years of surgeries, pain and disability for being so stupid.

Her relatives are also loathe to help her because she tithes to her church and they continually criticize her for it! Apparently, she is expected to surrender her religious practices and values in order to earn the sympathy and help of family. They are nonbelievers and do not attend church, therefore she must be just like them. It's as if she has to make a deal with Satan in order to get her needs met. Give up your religious practices, and you can eat.

Many Americans have come to the place where their first instinct is to blame and shame people for whatever misfortune has befallen them. The poor are routinely castigated and accused of a catalog of character defects and "bad life choices" that contributed to their condition. Never mind that these social judges pretend to be Christian and that Jesus loves the poor and vulnerable above all people.

"The meek shall inherit the world," not the arrogant, self-important people who treat others with contempt for making mistakes. Choosing to experience the freedom and beauty of nature by taking a hot air balloon ride is not a sin. It may not even be an error in judgment. I wouldn't choose to get into the gondola, but my interest in risk-taking games and rides is extremely low. Other folk, however, like excitement and adventure and may not even perceive a balloon ride as something risky. Some people even jump out of airplanes with parachutes. That's not my scene, but I would still feel terribly sorry for the guy whose chute malfunctions and he ends up spread across the landscape like peanut butter on a crispy cracker. A sizeable number of people, however, feel nothing but contempt for those whose later years don't find them in a mansion stuffed with gold-leaf covered furniture.

If you are needy, due to disability, poverty, or both, you are looked down upon, blamed, shamed, and discounted.

Where does this hard heartedness COME from? How can people like this look at themselves in the mirror in the morning? Even if one is not Christian, where is the compassion that famously resides in the heart of man?

I have experienced different versions of what my friend is enduring now.  Long ago, when I first became disabled, I remember a conversation with a supposedly good friend of 30 years' duration. When I told her I had become disabled and that my Social Security was not going to be enough to get all my needs met, she asked me in a withering and overbearing tone, "If Social Security isn't enough to live on why did you decide to retire?" The word "retire" hit me like a fat, wet mackerel to the face, as I hadn't used that term at all. She had substituted it for the word "disabled" in an effort to make me sound bad and irresponsible. Her immediate response to hearing that I was disabled was to blame me, as if I had chosen to be sick and stop working.

Another odd thing that immediately started is that a number of people began calling me "kiddo," as if I am one of their children, even though we are very close in age. No one ever called me "kiddo" before I became old, sick, poor and needy. I regularly ask people not to call me this, but it continues to happen. Calling someone a child, blaming them for their illnesses and then demanding that the needy person live according to the dictates of others seems to be part of the general package that is thrust upon people like my friend and me.

Fortunately, I have several Catholic friends who walk with Jesus and whose kindness and generosity has kept me from being in much worse condition than I might be otherwise. Others are not so lucky and I do what I can to help when I can, even though my resources are puny.

Contrary to popular myth, "the government" doesn't supply every need of the poor and disabled, nor are there huge numbers of "fakers" who are "milking the system." The millions of poor people living in America today are mostly elderly and disabled people who have spent their whole lives paying taxes and paying into Social Security, doing what they were supposed to do, being upstanding citizens, only to be blamed and skewered with really mean lies at the fag end of their lives.

Grandmas and grandpas are struggling through their supposedly golden years because they had the bad taste to end up poor and/or disabled. It makes me sick, really, every time I hear one of these stories from one of my friends or neighbors, and the only thing that soothes me is the knowledge that God knows all and sees all and that the poor and vulnerable will spend eternity with Him, bouyed up with eternal kindness, eternal generosity, eternal peace and painlessness.

I do not pretend to know what will happen to the people who harass, lie about and criticize the vulnerable and sick in our society. The harassers frequently tell me they are sure they are going to heaven. We shall see.

In the meantime, I pray for my friend and all the other disabled and elderly people she represents. Please join me in those prayers.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose Parnell

100 YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF FATIMA - MINISTRY PROJECT FOR 2017

70,000 spectators witnessed "The Miracle of the Sun" which 

occurred on the very day promised by our lady in 1917

Non-Catholics often scoff at the miracles celebrated in our church, but the miracles surrounding Fatima and the three little children who saw our Blessed Mother and received many "secrets" from her, played only a very small part in the miraculous events of 1917.

It is one thing to experience a celestial anomaly that can be explained away by some natural phenomena. It is quite another to have this anomaly promised for a certain day and time and have it actually occur, with more than 70,000 witnesses, many photographs of the miracle as well as the witnesses, and wide ranging newspaper coverage. This cannot be discounted or dismissed and, once you know the details, the wonderful mystery stays within the heart of even the most skeptical individual.

MANY articles and books have been written about these events, and another article isn't needed. I recommended researching the internet and reading as many of the books as you are able so that you can fully understand what happened.

Most of the legitimate apparitions that have been confirmed and approved by the Catholic Church include a request from our Lady that we pray the rosary. I adore the rosary and am convinced of its incredible, heavenly properties. Its benefits and significance are not entirely explained, as it is with most mysterious practices and points of theology or cosmology. Our Lady has personally requested it and I, for one, will not argue with her.

I've become incredibly inspired to spread this devotion to the rosary this coming year, during the 100th year anniversary of the miracles at Fatima, and I would like to encourage everyone to enjoy its practice and benefits.

First of all, I recommend contacting the Fatima Gift Shop at the WORLD APOSTOLATE OF FATIMA, official organization for Fatima, affectionately called "the Blue Army." Their website is located HERE. I am a member of the Blue Army and receive their wonderful magazine entitled SOUL, but I am not involved in any official capacity and receive no benefit from them as a result of recommending them. I just want to support them in their efforts to spread the instruction of our Lady and the historical events that occurred in 1917.

Consider purchasing for yourself a commemorative rosary. Currently, they come in black or clear, with a special 100 year anniversary medal attached. It's a nice little crystal and/or glass bead rosary.  I have one in pink, but I think they have run out of the pink and the blue currently. They are selling for $19.00 at the moment, which is not a bad price for a pretty little rosary with such significance. Attached to the rosary is a sweet little commemorative medal. You can buy the medal separately, if you wish. You'll need to have them blessed by a priest after you receive them, however.

The black rosary is pictured HERE.

The clear bead rosary is pictured HERE.

Of course, there are many other items available at the gift shop, and I do recommend you consider joining the Blue Army!

Everyone seems to enjoy the Blue Army's rosaries, medals and other items from their gift shop, including the homeless, who are comforted by them.

If you do not have time to distribute these rosaries, or if you do not have anyone in your sphere who you feel will appreciate them, I would be very happy to give many of them locally, in my parish and elsewhere. Contact me for my address, and you can have the Blue Army send them to me, or you can donate via the button on the right hand side of this page, keeping in mind that Paypal takes a percentage of all monies donated.

I am just enthusiastic to have this devotion spread as far as possible.

If you can manage to send me some rosaries from the World Apostolate of Fatima, I would be most grateful. I have a friend who will take them to a priest to have them blessed. One of the very best ways to encourage the practice of the praying of the rosary is to give them away. Obviously, there are less expensive rosaries that are very pretty. For instance, I have included quite a few in my Amazon list GIFTS TO GIVE TO OTHERS that you may find HERE. Amazon has my address and will mail to me directly.

I ask for assistance in giving these out because my income falls far below my basic needs, so I just don't have the money to invest in the rosaries. What I lack in finances, I make up for in enthusiasm.

On the other hand, if you also feel inspired to distribute rosaries, and you can do this yourself, I would be very happy to hear that you are doing that. Our Blessed Mother will be very pleased. Post a comment, below, or send me an email and let me know what you are dong to promote this wonderful prayer and its 100 year anniversary!

In the meantime, I pray for you, as I hope you pray for me.

God bless us all!

Silver Rose Parnell

SAINT AELIA FLACILLA - My 48th Great Grandmother

Many people are skeptical when they hear that I am descended from various saints and royals. It sounds like wishful thinking, or perhaps some sort of bragging, but it's not. Thousands of people are descended from the same families but have not substantiated their genealogy. The thing is, history books and other mentions in contemporaneous writings are available to us, either on the internet or in numerous reference books at the libraries. The royals are especially easy to follow through the centuries. Some of them happen to be saints, and carry that special significance through time.

Most inspiring to me are the early saints who were subjected to incredible persecution and whose efforts at evangelization were the building blocks of the early church. A lot of responsibility was on the shoulders of the royals, for instance, when introducing the faith as the standard of moral and theological thought upon which their respective countries would operate.

In the case of my 48th great grandmother, Saint Aelia Flaccilla, first wife of Emperor Theodosius, she was instrumental in advancing the case for the Nicene Creed being adopted by the faith itself.  In fact, she is said to have prevented a meeting between her husband and a promoter of the Arian heresy that would deny the Nicene Creed. Christian concepts were embodied in the Nicene Creed, not created by it, but heretics fought it.

Saint Aelia also helped and served the disabled, which appeals to me immensely, of course, not just because I am disabled but because I love the disabled who are usually ALSO poor and also have fewer of their needs met than an able bodied poor person. The disabled, who are one of the most vulnerable populations, are especially loved by God. He went so far to say that anyone who served the least of these (the most vulnerable) are serving Jesus Himself. The more I come to love Jesus, the more I feel love for "the least of these," because I recognize, bit by bit, that he is specially present with them.

The fact that an Empress, who could delegate any task to someone else, would herself put her hands to the service of the disabled, makes her a wonderful example for all of us. Since I am descended from her, I feel an especially strong desire to live up to her example, and I also feel a deep feeling of connection with her.

As far as we can tell, the saints have gone directly to heaven and are advocating for us, praying for us, and watching us. On the other side, I feel heard by them and am encouraged by it. I am not suggesting that a familial relationship to the saints is somehow superior to a relationship between a Catholic and his or her chosen patron saints. Not at all. It is just that, for me personally, having a familial relationship fills a giant void in my heart that other people may not have. My earthly family experience with my immediate family was just horrible, and I am completely detached from the few that remain. Jesus, Mary, the angels, the saints, and my Catholic family have become my real family.

"For my father and mother have abandoned me,

and the Lord has taken me up."

Psalm 27:10

In general, I recommend getting to know ALL the saints you possibly can. You may be surprised at the number of them for whom you feel some special connection. They're attentive to us and are waiting for us to appeal to them. I imagine they are already praying for us.

When I speak to the saints, I don't send my words out as if traveling over a far distance. For me, the saint to whom I speaking, whether it is Aelia or Olga or Margaret of Scotland, is sitting right next to me, holding my hand, their face drawn very close to mine. The breath of my words wafts across their ears. They're listening intently, and I am understood without explanation. It bouys me up.

With regard to Saint Aelia, she is a saint in the Orthodox Church and not the Catholic, even though her lifetime was long before the split between the two. I have often wondered if my strong desire for the reunion of the Catholic and Orthodox church can be traced to some genetic memory of my sainted Orthodox and Catholic ancestors. It could be that both Catholic and Orthodox ancestors are praying for all their descendants, and I feel love for both paths of the faith. It is interesting to speculate about the origins of my peculiar prayer ministry for the reunion, but I don't suppose I will know for sure until the Lord takes me home.

In the meantime, I call upon Saint Aelia (and others) for intercession of the Lord for the purpose of the reunion of the Catholic and Orthodox Churches, so that the body of Christ may breath with both lungs once more. I invite you to join me!

God bless us all,
Silver Rose Parnell

THE GOD OF SECOND CHANCES

In Tuesday's general election, Hillary Clinton received the most votes from the people, but Donald Trump won the Electoral College votes and is therefore our new President Elect. As a result, there were thousands of people in a number of cities throughout the United States who protested Trump's election as our soon-to-be president. About ten thousand people protested in front of Trump Plaza, well into the late evening. Chicago and Los Angeles experienced large protests. Even here in Albuquerque, we had people in the streets.

This is by no means the first time that a president has lost the popular vote but won the election. It is a unique American quirk that we accept as the legitimate method of determining the winner in any campaign. Peaceful protest is also a feature of the American democratic system and, as long as it doesn't deteriorate into violence, is allowed to occur.

As soon as it became apparent that Trump was going to win the Electoral College votes, I began to pray for him, dedicating a rosary to his well-being and praying that Trump experience a radical conversion of heart. I continue to hope that the enormity of his responsibilities brings him to his knees before God, chastens him and humbles him, so that he can be successful as a president of all the people. As he begins to realize that most of the American people did not want him in the office, but he has to be president of all the people, I imagine it will likely hit him very hard.

My 33rd great grandmother was a Ukrainian ruler who earned a reputation as a bloody and retaliatory queen. In vengeance for the murder of her husband, she nearly wiped out an entire ethnic minority, doing so in a most gruesome and cruel manner. Later, she somehow experienced a great conversion, became baptized, and is now known as Saint Olga of Kiev, patron of widows and converts. If that woman can become a saint, there is hope for all of us.

A wonderful feature of our faith is the Lord's great love for us that manifests in forgiveness, over and over again, immediately upon our expression of regret and plea for forgiveness. Jesus is the ruler of our hearts and meets us there in love.

Donald Trump has expressed harsh criticisms against several minorities, the disabled, women, veterans captured in battle, the American press, and refugees escaping war torn countries. His rhetoric has been vulgar, insulting, retaliatory, and, frankly, dangerous to the welfare of our country (such as when he invited the Russians to covertly interfere with our elections, which, apparently, they did, to some degree or another.) His worldview, as consistently expressed by him, is the antithesis of the Christian worldview.

Despite all the negatives, Christians voted him into office because of his supposedly pro-life sentiments and his stated intention to appoint pro-life judges to the Supreme Court. In one sense, it was a wild gamble. Trump presents as anything but a good Christian man, but our hope springs eternal. We have seen great conversions before, and this is what it will take in order for this man to meet the expectations of the Christians who voted for him. This is what I pray for.

I ask all my readers to join me in praying for Donald Trump, his family and his support staff. Let us pray for his deep conversion of heart that strengthens his promises with regard to the pro-life cause. Let us pray that he seeks a soft spot on which to land when things get tough for him in the many many battles that face him, and that he realizes that the soft spot he seeks is the loving heart of Christ.

God bless us all...

Silver Rose

THE SUN RISES EVERY DAY

One of the primary reasons the Jews didn't accept Jesus as the Messiah is that Jesus came as a poor person with no power, whereas they were expecting him to be an earthly king. They would say , "what good can come from Nazareth?"

Jesus emphasized, over and over again, that the meek will inherit the earth (meaning "everything"), not the powerful. The meek and tender of heart will inherit the true riches of human life, which is eternal relationship with him.

Political power and position were never held as the goal of Christians, which is why i am so surprised to see so many Christians become hysterical, getting angry, and generally expressing a doom and gloom vision of the future. While it is important to participate in the political story, it is not our story, and we need to remember that. We do the best we can, leaving the result to God.

If your candidate does not win, it isn't the end of the world. I promise. Jesus promised. Whatever the result, accept it and move on.

Yesterday, I awoke to hot air balloons in the sky with the sound of migrating sand hill cranes in the background. God is good. Life is good. Take heart.

Silver Rose

THE POOR DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING

If an American makes $50,000 a year, he or she will pay about seven (7) dollars per year into the welfare system that supports the indigent on the bottom third of the poverty spectrum.

An in-depth analysis of the facts and statistics was done very nicely HERE on the blog Soapboxie. There are numerous other sources on the internet that echo this information, but I like the charts that this author provides, as well as the way he explains them. Very nice work, on his part.

In return for that seven dollars, a great number of tax payers are exceedingly interested in the activities of that person who receives that seven (7) dollars. They have a lot of opinions about what the poor, disabled and vulnerable should do in exchange for that tiny bit of assistance, and most of those opinions are damn mean.

In addition, the ratio of amount of assistance given, compared to the amount of control some people want over the recipients, would be hysterical if it weren't so sad. To be so focused on the money that drizzles into the pockets of the poor, while the corporate robber barons are emptying our bank accounts just doesn't make any sense.

Jesus would be appalled.

I do not receive any welfare, since I live on the Social Security that accumulated after working more than 33 years, but I very occasionally receive a donation on this blog. The cost of bringing internet into the home far exceeds the pittance I receive in donations, on a year by year basis. (I had hoped that the blog would at least pay for itself but unfortunately, it does not. I refuse to junk up my page with ads from marketers, however. I figure that, at the very least, I can give my readers a respite from the constant flow of sales pitches by corporations that they have to endure on every other page they access.)

Of the very few who donate, most are extremely kind. Others, in the guise of kindness, will assail me with a barrage of unsolicited "advice" that is not only unnecessary, but would also be insulting, if I was inclined toward that sort of response.

Although I have no choice as to whether or not I will be poor, the vast majority of monastics throughout time have been poor by choice and by chance. Ideally, it is a chosen thing, a sacrifice made for God. Even if poverty is thrust upon a monastic by circumstance, we are encouraged to embrace it. When poverty impinges upon the ability of the monastic to perform his or her functions, measures have to be taken to alleviate it. Poverty, in its essence, is not a "good" thing, but a tool in the hands of the spiritual aspirant.

Consequently, most monasteries rely upon a combination of donations and some type of work of the hands that they may sell. Whether it is coffee, candies, rosaries or liquor, most monastics have to produce something for sale in order to survive. In days gone by, most monasteries and convents survived by gifts alone, but modern times find us with far fewer devoted Christians who understand the value of what the monastic "produces" by his or her presence and prayers. Sadly, Westerners are capitalists first and Christians second, in most cases.

Being disabled and gradually becoming more so, I do not have the capacity to produce anything to any meaningful extent, which is why I have a donation request on my front page. Still, there are people who will insist upon gifting me with their opinion of what I must do to produce something worthy of payment. It is exhausting, especially since they fail to observe that I am already doing something worthy.

After trying, and failing, to get me to live under her rule, a recent small donor has gone off in a huff and unfollowed my blog. A relative who gave me a television similarly subjected me to an overbearingd brow-beating. Another who sent me a book a year or two ago erupted into a tirade of name-calling and public excoriation because I will not vote for her political candidate. Unfortunately, these people felt entitled to control my actions after contributing an extremely small amount to the household. People complain that the poor feel entitled, but my experience of life is the opposite. It is those who give with big strings attached who have a sense of entitlement.

The Bible tells us to invite those persons to our banquets who cannot afford to return a similar invitation. I definitely cannot afford to turn my life over to those who give me a few dollars. I have already given that life to God, and it is not for sale.

I have vacillated back and forth about whether or not to continue the blog or if I should dedicate the time spent writing it to some other endeavor. For the time being, I will keep it, because there are more than a few readers who tell me that their condition mirrors mine and that they receive encouragement and grace from my words.

Just as Jesus used parables to instruct, I offer the small circumstances of my life as an example that can be extrapolated to an understanding of the conditions of the poor, disabled and discarded in America, in order to rouse love in the hearts of those who denigrate the poor, and to support the faithful Christian in whom love already flows but who suffers from living in a hostile angry world.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose Parnell

GRAB YOUR INSPIRATION WHERE YOU FIND IT

The Shrine of the Most Blessed Sacrament

EWTN televised mass

I used to be uninterested in televised mass. I didn't see the point. There is no Eucharist, and "spiritual communion" didn't sound like an even mildly approximate replacement, despite the fact that my spiritual temperament runs to the mystical side, and I have an easy imagination.

Mother Angelica (God rest her soul) and her creation, the Eternal Word Television Network, along with its magnificent Shrine of the Most Blessed Sacrament have lightened this little hermit's world to a degree I did not imagine possible.

I began watching the 5:00 mass from a sense of duty, really. It just came to me. Or perhaps the Lord led me there. In any case, the timing is perfect. I generally take tea at 4 p.m. at the end of the day's exertions. An hour later, after refreshment and spiritual reading, I feel the tranquilIty of evening beginning to descend.

The mass is just beautiful. I happened to have a copy of the ADOREMUS HYMNAL, and I have no idea where I obtained it. Somehow it appeared in my books. The mass is about half Latin chant, half English, and the hymns, so far, are lovely. The version I have is out of date, and I have to shuffle around through the pages a bit, as a result, but since I am alone in the room, I needn't worry about disturbing other worshippers.

The mass is conducted in what seems to be a small chapel, probably just off of the main Shrine. You can see the picture, above. It is very beautiful and golden, but simple at the same time.  The mass is conducted with great reverence and beauty. There is no clapping, thanks be to God, no talking amongst the people in the congregation, and a certain gentleness pervades throughout.

I found myself being drawn into the mass. There, in my living room, I am learning the Latin chant, singing the hymns at full voice, and participating in all the responses and prayers. The spiritual communion is growing on me.

After only a few days, I've begun to anticipate 5:00 p.m. mass every day. It has quietly begun to smooth me into a rhythm that I haven't been able to establish on my own. Soon, I found myself scheduling reminders on the television set, but I suspect I will not need them.

When I was young, I was terribly disciplined. As an older lady, I am humbled with chronic pain, mobility issues and other problems. Things are quite different now, and I must find my inspirations and organizations where I can. Thanks be to God, he sends me enough aid to keep me on track.

For all the other elderly hermits out there, I recommend the televised mass on EWTN. In younger days, we may have made pilgrimage to the place: just hopped into the car and driven there over miles and days. Instead, we drive our recliners to a virtual wonderland of inspiration in a heavenly land.

Get the Adoremus Hymnal so you can fully participate, and you won't regret it.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose

GETTING OUT OF BED HAS BECOME AN ART

Sunset at the hermitage

In the sunset of my life, I am finding the simplest things most difficult. Getting in and out of bed, for instance, is a production, which is probably why I sleep so often in my recliner. I get a much better, much deeper and more restorative sleep, however, if I sleep in the bed, a bed, I might add, that cost me a fortune and took two years to pay for.

The problem is that, if I DO get a good night's sleep or 8 or 10 hours straight through, I wake with my lower spine and hips frozen in pain if I move. If I just lay there, I am alright. The mornings are beautiful and I can pray the time away, but at some time I have to get up, and this is when the morning comedy show begins.

All the icons appeared to be staring at me while I tried to wriggle myself out of bed one morning. The night before, I had finally put together a rolling bed cart so I could bring the computer into the bedroom on some evenings when the Pope is engaged in some special event and I want to see it on EWTN at 3:00 in the morning or whatever odd time of the early morning it had to be shown, due to time differences around the world. It is an inconvenience, but there is something wonderful about being included in an event as it happens.

The cart was blocking the side of the bed which I customarily use to crawl out in the morning, but it didn't occur to me that I might not be able to get out of bed on the other side.

Feeling very much like Kafka's cockroach, I wriggled and squirmed, trying to find a position that would allow me to exit the bed without wrenching my back and causing even more damage to it. It took a good ten minutes before my feet found the floor, finally, and I began the customary production involved in straightening my back.

It is on day's like this that I am grateful to be living alone, with no one to see my comedic stylings in my pajamas...no one except the Lord, of course.

Please pray for me, as I pray for you.

Silver Rose

ONE RINGY DINGY

I have lived as a religious hermit for about 13 years. I became disabled before becoming Catholic, and I have been mostly housebound ever since.

Frequently, a hermit will enter into a relationship with a spiritual director, especially in the beginning and especially if the hermit is unfamiliar with monastic life.  Although I have lived a self-consecrated life devoted exclusively to God since 2002, and since I had several years of experience in monastic life prior to that, I wondered if I should attempt to find a spiritual director and if I should take more formal vows and increase my commitment, so, about a year ago, I started making telephone calls to vocation directors on the vocation committee for this dioceses.

What I did not know is that you practically have to be a rock star to get someone in the archdiocese to return your telephone call! According to someone "in the know," you have to be a known person to someone in the parish, otherwise the Catholic hierarchy ignores you, no matter how many emails you send, phone calls you make or letters you write. At the very least, you have to have a priest, a sister in a significant ministry, or someone IMPORTANT to champion you. Even a hard working layperson in long term ministry does not have enough Catholic currency to warrant a response to a heart-felt email on my behalf. She's not part of the Catholic hierarchy, so she doesn't warrant a response.

A year ago,  I did manage to reach a sister on the vocations committee on her cell phone that was given to me by a sister who has previously held that position. She promised me she would get in touch with our new bishop to see if he was inclined to have diocesan hermits among his flock. She also promised to find me a spiritual director. She then proceeded to duck every phone call and refused to return any of my telephone messages. That was last October, exactly one year ago on the 19th.

After my failure with that sister, I sent many emails and left many telephone messages for a long list of people at the Dioceses, from the Bishop's office on downward. No luck. No response. Two months ago I managed to connect with a lovely woman, who is the assistant to Father _________, who, she tells me, is the person to speak with in regard to my situation. I left 4 messages with her and never received a response from Father ___________. During my last telephone message, I asked her to call me back and tell me if I was doing something wrong or pursuing something inappropriately. No response.

Not returning telephone calls used to be considered very bad manners in days gone by, but I am afraid that it is endemic in our society. I don't know why this has happened, whether it is a sign of the times or a sign of my reduced circumstances in life. In my 20's, when I was writing for a popular television show, I don't recall my messages ever going unanswered. People wanted things from me. Now, I have nothing to offer but prayers, something which has no currency, even in the world of the professional religious.

I have a long list of telephone numbers and email addresses to which I have sent requests for help and none of them have responded over many months' time.

I was raised without religion and was in my late 30's before I learned anything about Jesus. From that time forward, gaining access to the Catholic Church was problematic.  I wanted to get baptized immediately, but a misinformed religious sister told me it would be YEARS before I could be baptized with the Catholic Church because, in the past, I had been divorced. She was terribly wrong. I was not living in any kind of irregular union and there was no reason not to be baptized, but there seems to be a strong elitist faction in the official church that thrives on pushing people away. (Baptism, for those that do not know, washes away all sin, and non-sacramental unions between people who haven't been baptized are NOT the types of unions that cannot be dissolved. The Catholic laws about divorce deal with "sacramental marriage" between baptized persons.)

Indeed, the religious sister that refused me baptism in the church behaved as if she enjoyed the power to say "no." I have to say that, in later years, I did learn that many Catholics are terribly ill-educated about the church, so I am not saying that this sister was deliberately lying, just that she seemed to enjoy pushing me away, thinking at the same time she was right to do so.

Eventually, another sister, an 11th cousin of mine, who DID know the Canon laws, helped to get me accepted into the Church, but even with her advocacy, I had a terrible time getting into the church.. Because of my disabilities, I had to have private instruction rather than attend an RCIA class. I couldn't sit through the classes and couldn't drive at night. Although the priest of the Byzantine Church I was attending gave permission for my cousin to walk me through the lacunas in my education, the deacon refused to allow it because he was in the middle of pursuing his career as a priest and said he didn't have time to help at all.

I am blessed to know many highly respectable, extremely kind Catholic lay people who have adopted me as their own and treat me like part of their families. My survival would be severely curtailed, were it not for my Catholic family, and I would have little, if any feeling of community without them.

These experiences just further my resolve to pray for the strengthening of the Catholic Church because, while I am disappointed in the Church's failure to include the marginalized, the poor, the disabled and the abandoned in the workings of the institution, I am absolutely convinced of THE FAITH, which is sublime.

There is a great wealth of spiritual currency amongst the marginalized members of the church, the lonely old ladies, the disabled, unmarried people, and many converts whose friends and families have abandoned them because of their faith. The man who came to fix my telephone service the other day told me that I remind him of his auntie who, when she retired, announced that she would be spending the rest of her life for the Lord. She too has a large prayer corner and altar, with statues and pictures all over the place. I'm sure she recites many prayers throughout the day and, like me, probably watches the mass on television, reads the spiritual books and prays for everyone.

The natural inclination among retired people, especially those who find themselves alone and often disabled, is to throw themselves on the mercy of the Lord, and I know that I have many, many readers in that group

I want to ENCOURAGE my readers who are likewise living the eremitic life and to affirm the necessity of persistence against whatever obstacle appears to be standing in your way, either in the living of the life or the rejection of you by those in power in your parish or your diocese. Just remember what Jesus said, "Forgive them, Lord, for they know not what they do."

You DO have spiritual power and importance. Your prayers that you conduct privately in your homes, in the dead of night when you cannot sleep, in your heart when you are washing the pots and pans, these prayers, devotions and pains offered up to the Lord are beloved by the Lord, and your efforts are not in vain. None of us needs the permission of anyone to lead a life completely devoted to prayer. While true that many of us could benefit from spiritual direction from a reputable and soulful spiritual director, we have to have the faith that the Lord will take care of us, knowing our needs of every variety.

As long as we live a good Christian life and remain faithful to Catholic theology, we can't go wrong. I would insert a word of caution here, and that is that it is important that we do not entertain any spirit of anger or rebellion and that we are very careful to continue to educate ourselves in the doctors of the church, the Catechism, and the Bible.  Contributing to ersatz apparitions and seers that are not approved by the Catholic Church should NOT be done. Without the leadership of a spiritual director, we must play it safe, rather than be sorry later. We can never put ourselves forward as knowing a better way than the way the Church has outlined in faith and morals.

Just because fallible human beings populate the structure of the Holy Catholic Church and mistakes are made, I, for one, am convinced that it is essential to remain faithful to its requirements. While I am upset that no one in the church will return a telephone call from an unimportant Catholic with no 'pull', my obedience to and love of the church remains as strong as ever. I think the best approach is to continue on my own, trusting in the Lord to guide me. After all, if He thought I needed the cooperation of the Church in my prayer mission, He would have paved the way for it.

Let us stand together in solidarity with one another and pray for one another in our solitary lives. I would like to suggest that we offer prayers for one another at regular times throughout the day, to our best ability.

Generally speaking, I say prayers at noon, three o'clock and six o'clock. I also say "morning prayers" at whatever time I manage to arise, and evening prayers. Morning prayers would customarily be 6 a.m., but I am having some sleep problems just now and cannot manage to get up in the morning as my medications don't permit it. I have many rosaries and chaplets that I recite also, with some corresponding prayers.

If you are interested in praying "with" me at the same time, please contact me and we can work something out. I feel that this extra layer of prayer will bring a measure of strength into our spiritual practice.

Together, we can create our own support for our spiritual lives, absent the care and concern of the institutional church.

In the meantime, please pray for me as I pray for you.

God bless us all!

Silver Rose

(Sannyasini Kaliprana)

Silver Cottage Ashram Hermitage

Albuquerque, New Mexico

JUST RELAX

If someone points out a defect in your favorite political candidate, and you feel a violent reaction; if you feel like taking a baseball bat to their head or pouring a rain of insults all over them; take a deep breath, take a step back, and maybe take a walk. Do whatever will calm you. RESIST that urge to go nuts on your friend and destroy the friendship with ugly personal insults.

Realize that, for some reason, you feel identified with the candidate to the extent that you are willing to go all scorched earth in other areas of your life, and understand that something is out of balance because you've taken the bad news personally. You have to remember that you are not married to the candidate, and you have to respect that every one of your Christian brothers and sisters has to exercise their own conscience and prudential judgment, which may not comport with yours.

Discussion can be fruitful, if calm and reasoned. It is especially important to exchange facts for facts and to avoid attacking the character of the person whose political decisions are not the same as yours.

There is an erroneous strain of thought some have adopted that if you do not vote for the Republican Candidate, you are committing a horrible sin and should be denied communion. This is ridiculous. It does not represent the position of the Catholic Church.

Pope Benedict, when he was Cardinal Ratzinger, and the Prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, outlined the position of the Catholic Church, as follows:

"A Catholic would be guilty of formal cooperation in evil,

and so unworthy to present himself for Holy Communion,

if he were to deliberately vote for a candidate precisely

because of the candidate's permissive stand on abortion

and/or euthanasia. When a Catholic does not share a

candidate's permissive stand on abortion and/or

euthanasia, but votes for that candidate for other

reasons, it is considered remote material

cooperation, which can be permitted in the

presence of proportionate reasons."

Cardinal Ratzinger, 

Prefect for the Congregation

for the doctrine of the faith

I would customarily be voting for a pro-life candidate, except that the Republican offering this year appears to be a crazy man, insecure, vengeful, with a fascist world view. He actually threatened to throw his competitor in jail, were he to win the prize of the presidency. He treats women, minorities and the disabled with contempt, publicly mocking them and calling them names. We've all heard the vulgar conversation between him and Billy Bush of Access Hollywood, wherein he bragged about assaulting women. He recently denied having actually assaulted anyone, calling his words "locker room talk," but there is ample evidence that he had a reputation for many years of actually having assaulted women. He trotted out 4 women with complaints against Bill Clinton (who is not running for office), making the EWW factor much worse, during the 2nd debate.

In addition, the fact checking organizations have blown apart most of his assertions, giving him a 73% to 76% score of lies. Satan is the father of lies, and, although I realize that many politicians are liars these days, the lies that Donald Trump dishes out are incendiary. They are calculated to inflame his "base," which appears to be a bunch of really angry people. He expressed admiration for Putin as a leader (he's a dictator), and he invited "Russia" to hack our computer systems.

Most telling is that Trump is no longer working within the framework of his supposed party, calling them names and tweeting angry rants at 3 in the morning. Many Republicans that previously endorsed him have rescinded their endorsements and are distancing themselves from him.

Hilary Clinton is almost certainly the next president, but, as one Republican political analyst recently opined, we will outlive Clinton. We know how to deal with Clinton. We have no idea how to handle Trump, if he COULD be handled at all. I envision him insulting world leaders and getting us into a nuclear war.

Trump's promise to install good justices just isn't enough to justify voting for the evil man he appears to be. The damage he will do far outweighs the slim chance that he will keep his promises in the pro-life area. Keep in mind, he promised to release his tax returns upon getting the nomination, and as soon as he was nominated, he refused and continues to refuse. He doesn't keep his promises, and he is hiding something, probably another lie.

So, that is my thinking on this season's political offerings.

ON THE OTHER HAND, I understand why some people might vote for him. Several of my friends are voting for him because they are hoping that he will keep his promise by installing pro-life justices to the supreme court and by working on overturning Roe v. Wade. I notice, however, that he rarely talks about the pro-life issues and, when he does, he has no fire in the belly for the cause. 

Another thing to consider...we have had many supposedly "pro-life" presidents in the past, and abortion is STILL legal. It appears that people like Trump use the promise of a pro-life position to expand their base. I just don't believe him. Some people are willing to take the chance, and that's OK. I won't be calling them names.

Most of all, I recommend that we ALL remember the promises of Christ. We know how this story ends, in the long run, and all we can do in the meantime is the best we can, given the circumstances in which we find ourselves, no matter how contradictory and crazy. Most important is that all Christians have to hang together and avoid tearing apart the body of Christ because of political differences.

Stay calm, people.

God bless,

Silver Rose Parnell

HOW ARE YOU?

Close up of the table in the prayer corner

(c) 2016

"How are you?" is the hardest question for me to answer because I am always wonderful in the most important sense. I have been graced by the Lord with faith and many other blessings. I have the promise of heaven, if I follow the commandments of Jesus. What could be better?

When people ask me, "how are you?" however, they are usually asking about the conditions of my life, what is HAPPENING since the last time we spoke, and THIS is very often "bad" news that would customarily indicate that I was not doing well at all. There is a whole litany of sorrows I could recite. When some people hear about the bad news, such as the current question of cancer and whether or not the impending biopsy will reveal it, they assume that I am doing badly. I WOULD be doing badly, I suppose, if not for the beauty of my faith and the promises of Christ!

How do I answer the person? Should I give the same answer every time and say that I am wonderful, or should I catch them up with the news of the moment. I suppose it depends upon the character of the person to whom I am speaking, and whether or not they also identify their wellbeing with their spiritual life rather than the happenings of their life.

Most of the saints had horrible lives. Contrary to the popular "new age" religions and some protestant denominations, no matter how "good" you are, the pains and sorrows of life will likely visit you.

Personally, it has been my observation that, the more faithful you are to the commandments of Christ, the more problems you have. I suspect that Satan has something to do with this. He tries to drive a wedge between us and our Lord by pestering us with sorrows. He promises us all sorts of comforts and enjoyments if we would only give up our devotion to the Lord and live a more selfish life.

The story of Job is a perfect example of this. Satan, in his tremendous ego, told God that he could wrest Job's soul away from the Lord if only enough sorrows would be visited upon him. The Lord told him to go ahead and try. He knew Job and knew that he would not abandon his faith. Job remained faithful to the Lord, despite every conceivable sorrow and misery that Satan heaped upon him.

It isn't that we don't benefit from the sympathy, compassion and prayers of other Christians when life deals us its inevitable blows. No one is that stoic. We are meant to console one another, to grieve with those that grieve and rejoice with those that rejoice. Our connections with other Christians are encouraged by the Lord. He told us that he would be with us when 2 or more were gathered in his name. In our resistance to the wiles of Satan, we NEED the support and prayers of one another.

THIS is why I lead a life of continuous prayer, especially for the purification and healing of The Church and the reunion of the Orthodox with the Catholic Church. WE are part of the body of Christ and need to pull together. Our mutual support may or may not produce situational healing in the lives of one another, but certainly heals the soul.

In short, I am doing just wonderful, but please pray for me, as I pray for you.

God bless us all!

Silver Rose Parnell

CANCER SCARE - PLEASE PRAY FOR THE LITTLE HERMIT

Padre Pio: priest, stigmatist, mystic, spiritual father

Due to some continuous pain and distortion of the index finger of my left hand, I've had to seek medical treatment. After a suspicious x-ray a few days ago, I saw a hand specialist in the orthopedic department of the hospital.

It could be an enchondroma, which occurs throughout the body and usually doesn't get treated EXCEPT in the case of fingers, where the bones are small and cannot accommodate a growth inside the bone without causing some big problems.

It could be cancer.

In the case of an enchondroma, the treatment is a surgery in which the material is scraped out from inside the bone and replaced with some slivers of bone from my hip. (See brief explanation from the internet, below my signature at the end of this post.)

In the case of cancer, they will have to remove my finger.

Toward the end of this month, I will have an outpatient surgical biopsy of the bone in that finger and it will tell me which it is.

I ask you to please pray for me, that this disease be completely healed, but MOSTLY I ask that you pray for the intercession of Padre Pio with the Lord, that I be graced with strength and serenity to accept whatever comes.

As usual, I pray for you also.

Love and blessings,
Silver Rose

ENCHONDROMA INFORMATION:  "Enchondromas are benign cartilaginous neoplasms that are usually solitary lesions in intramedullary bone. The primary significant factors of enchondromas are related to their complications, most notably pathologic fracture, and a small incidence of malignant transformation, which may be associated with pathologic fracture.
The lesions replace normal bone with mineralized or unmineralized hyaline cartilage, thereby generating a lytic pattern on radiographs or, more commonly, a lytic area containing rings and arcs of chondroid calcifications. The lesions likely arise from cartilaginous rests that are displaced from the growth plate."

DEFINITION OF LYTIC LESION FROM NATIONAL CANCER INSTITUTE:  "Destruction of an area of bone due to a disease process, such as cancer."

STAY INSPIRED!

The Three Archangels

Those who read my blog might think it would be difficult to keep the spiritual inspiration going, considering the illnesses and difficulty performing natural functions. The simplest logistics are maddeningly difficult, it's true, but I use both the painful moments, as well as those spent recuperating in my recliner to keep my mind uplifted so that I can approach a state of "praying always." I have written before that surrounding myself with holy pictures uplifts my soul and keeps my mind at the feet of the Lord. There seems to be no end to it, until I run out of wall space and book shelves!

My living room prayer corner

I LOVE the beauty of the icons, candles, incense, photographs, and all the accoutrements that call to mind the Lord, his saints and angels, but also speak to the heart of PRAYER. My living room prayer corner is an invitation to a very special and intimate conversation with the Lord. Whether I am praying a simple contemplative prayer or chanting the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin Mary, I am entering into a spiritual union with my beloved Lord. The candles are lit. The incense is burning. The conversation begins. This little prayer corner is directly across from my recliner, and I spend a lot of time just sitting and gazing at whichever icon appeals to me at that moment. I highly recommend that every household have AT LEAST ONE prayer corner. As it happens, I have two.

Modern life has one big advantage for someone like me who is disabled and nearly home bound. The internet and television bring me the world in a unique manner that all my books can't duplicate. It doesn't replace a good spiritual book, but introduces another dimension. First thing in the morning, I usually find the Bible reading for the day and read that. Afterwards, I meditate on the meaning and significance for me personally, which is known as "lectio divina."

Often, I resort to the EWTN (Eternal Word Television Network) and catch some special programming or participate in the televised mass, knowing that there are likely THOUSANDS of little old ladies like me who are participating at that very same moment. That idea makes me very happy.

Then I check out the saints for the day. There are two or three websites to which I can refer that give me those. Every day, there are MANY saints for whom we have a feast day, and it is wonderful to learn about a new saint or to reacquaint myself with a favorite. This may inspire me to recite a chaplet or some special prayers in honor of that saint. Sometimes I will write a blog post, and now that I have more reliable internet, there may be more of these.

I recommend subscribing to good magazines and circulars that are faithful to the magisterium, though I can't afford them at the moment. Being a member of the Confraternity of the Holy Rosary has been a source of great joy for me. The writings included in their modest little newsletter often give me great material for contemplation. I also am a supporter of the effort to have Blessed Margaret of Castello sainted, and their regular missives bring me holy reminders. There are other groups that send daily emails. Keep your eyes peeled for signs of heresy though, folks! There are plenty of groups that are actually created for the purpose of snatching the faithful AWAY from the church and into bizarre cults that have some problem with some arcane aspect of the Church.

Vintage rosary very similar to the one given to me

by a dear friend. Etsy is a good source for these.

My standard prayers are the rosary, but even in that case, I have several different rosaries. One is the St. Benedict rosary that a friend bought for me on pilgrimage to Rome. It gives me a sense of protection, both because of the prayers of protection against Satan that appear on each St. Benedict medal that is used to recite the "Our Father" prayers and because the friend who gave it to me is like a guardian angel for me.

Another beloved friend gave me a gorgeous moonstone rosary that is a vintage French piece of art, very delicate, with a beautiful feel to the beads. The granddaughter of a friend of mine made me a turquoise colored plastic and string rosary that I love to use on the days I honor Mother Teresa of Calcutta, a saint for whom I have a first class relic that this little girl gave me.

I have a faux pearl, lightweight rosary that I carry with me in my handbag, along with some very special medals given to me by friends who have traveled to various pilgrimage places and brought me items from those places. I've attached a small silver medal of Saint Jason, which is the name of my poor departed son who died a few years ago. I use that rosary while waiting for mass to start on the rare occasions when I am able to attend mass, and I use it while standing in front of the mausoleum where my son's ashes are interred. Always, I think about my son when I use that rosary and usually dedicate my prayers to him.

Chaplets are also a solid form of inspiration. I have a small statue of St. Michael in my living room prayer corner. Next to him, I keep a box with a small St. Michael chaplet. Another favorite is my chaplet of Divine Mercy. A beautiful picture of Divine Mercy Jesus features prominently on the wall across from my recliner and I can gaze at it while I use the chaplet.

St. Olga of Kiev, "Equal to the Apostles", is my 33rd great grandmother, and my deepest inspiration. She was JUST AWFUL before becoming Christian. If she can become a saint, we ALL have a chance! Recently, I was given a beautiful icon of her, made in the Ukraine where she lived. I also found a one-of-a-kind chaplet of her that came with instructions on how to recite a "niner" chaplet.

Baptism of St. Olga

Contemplation, lectio divina, the rosary, various chaplets, Bible study, study of the saints, big prayers, little prayers, the practice of the presence of God - All of these contribute to keeping my mind in the beauty of the Lord.

I have even developed quite a few methods of walking prayer while I am taking the dog out for his numerous constitutionals. All of the prayers are internal, so my neighbors don't think I've gone nuts and am talking to myself. Sometimes I simply recite the Jesus prayer, "Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy upon me, a poor sinner." Often, I recite the Ave Maria. When I am mentally sharp and there are no neighbors in the parking lot, I will recite an Ave, then a very short prayer for a neighbor or a cause...something different between each Ave.

There is no reason to imagine that these are "rote" prayers. They are only rote if you let your mind wander elsewhere. Heart, mind and spirit have to be joined, and there is nothing rote about it.

The variety of Catholic practice and prayers is amazing, and I rely upon MANY, as you can see. They are a wonderful distraction to pull the mind away from from chronic pain, suffering, and the tedium of the constant round of chores that take SO long when one is physically challenged. No matter what I am doing, whether walking the dog, doing dishes, laundry or scrubbing, it is ALL prayer, either through actual prayers said in tandem with the task OR by dedicating a more complex task to the Lord and practicing the presence of God while doing it.

Stay inspired, my friends! And pray for me once or twice during all of it, won't you?

God bless us all

Silver Rose Parnell

THE LAST LEAF

Hawks nesting tree in my back yard.

I long ago developed a personal philosophy of persistence with regard to important goals. I "shake the trees" until all the leaves fall off before I give up and, naturally, throw myself on the mercy of the Lord. I accept that whatever plan I had in mind was not the plan of God and, in obedience, I give it up with great joy.

Now that it has become clear that I neither have enough money to move into a safer, more appropriate space, nor do I have the assistance of anyone who could provide me with a residence, I have only one "leaf" left on this particular tree, and that is to return to my writing career that previously provided me with some extra income.

In addition to writing for television in my early 20's,, I also worked as a reader, editor and negotiator in a small literary agency that was the west coast arm of a larger company in New York that handled book authors, mostly fiction. Thanks to this experience, I am not afraid to attempt to write and market a book (or 2 or 3.) While I inspire, educate and entertain, I may also be able to purchase a hermitage that is suited to my needs. That is the hope.

Some research is needed, as at least one of the novels is based on historical fact. Internet access is also crucial, and I have finally settled upon a fairly reasonable plan that has a 2-year contract at that rate. Naturally, the installation fee and first bill is just awful, $234.00. Anyone who would like to contribute a portion of that fee is most welcome to click on the DONATION button on the right hand side of this blog post. There are also some reference books I need to get. I'll be checking with the library to see if they have any of these and, if I find one through that route, I will take the title off the wish list.

I have learned a bit about humility since becoming disabled and poor and having to beg for necessary items, but I hope that I have learned that lesson to the satisfaction of the Lord and that the current plan works so that I can be less of a burden upon the world. I keep reading that some people think that poor people enjoy their poverty and enjoy begging and being a drag upon the resources of the world. Speaking entirely from a personal point of view, I find it hard to believe this to be true in even a small way. But I digress.

Having to continually have my mind directed to the crushingly boring minutiae of survival in modern America is excruciatingly frustrating. Certainly, I live much better than natives in many parts of the continent of Africa, and I know that. No matter who you are, there will always be someone who is far worse off than you. I don't feel sorry for myself in the slightest. I am damn grateful for the many compensatory blessings bestowed on me by the Lord. But there are needs that are unmet. Medical dental and vision needs remain, Emotional needs remain, ministerial needs remain. Intellectual needs remain.

No man lives by bread alone, and I do not wish for anyone that they should have a barren life with only enough to keep their body alive. This isn't what God intended for ANY of us. What a grim vision!  Yet, many people of means truly believe that the needy should be satisfied with the very most meager of needs, such as cheap unhealthy food, air, and a roof of some sort. It is usually the wealthy who entertain the ideas that poor people are lazy and should get a damn job already. The wealthy are notoriously stingy, for the most part.

I have found that people of modest means are the most generous, the most kind, the most charitable and giving of any group of people, so I thank these people in advance, and I admire said people for having absorbed the message of Jesus, that we should love one another as much as we love ourselves.

Unfortunately, those of modest means, though generous, cannot always help in practical terms, so I pray especially for these people who have made themselves known in my life. I know most certainly that the Lord has sent them to me as personal messengers of his Love.

Currently, I am working on trying to organize and clean the house, which is quite difficult with my disabilities, but I am doing my best to create storage areas and methods of cleaning that do not take a lot of time and effort so that I can best devote myself to my writing. I will keep in touch vis-a-vis this blog and my Facebook page. I REALLY enjoy hearing from people, especially those who are also attempting to live a life devoted entire to the Lord.

Living a life devoted entirely to God while at the same time struggling to clean one's house and do all the other things that take 4 times longer than they did prior to full disability, is not an easy feat. I have been helped tremendously by a little book called THE PRACTICE OF THE PRESENCE OF GOD about saintly Brother Lawrence, who dedicated all his work amongst the cleaning of the pots and pans in the monastery to the Lord above, since he was not considered able enough to either sing in the choir or become a priest. Remaining a "lowly" brother, he attained great sanctification by performing feats that others thought were beneath them.

I too have many difficulties in attempting to perform all the religious rites I would like to do, so I offer up all those things that prevent me from doing so. There is also a wonderful little prayer from THE PIETA PRAYER BOOK called: "PRAYER FOR DAILY NEGLECTS." I recommend it highly. Often, I neglect to pray it, I am so disorganized at times, but once I DO pray it, I hope it covers the many times I have failed to do my duty.

At the very least, I keep my mind with the Lord, his saints and angels, and I recommend it to you, while I recommend YOU to all of them.

I will let you know how the book progresses, and I will be praying for you, as I hope you pray for me.

Love and blessings,
Silver Rose

THE HERMIT'S DIET

This morning's breakfast: Small organic

apple, 1 piece organic whole wheat seeded

bread, 1 piece cheddar cheese

My doctor wants me on an organic Mediterranean diet, due to multiple illnesses that would benefit and because I am allergic to a wide range of chemicals, pesticides and additives commonly found in the American diet these days.

When I told a friend that I was going on a "fishatarian" diet, meaning an organic vegetarian diet supplemented with fish (when I can get it), she nearly shrieked when she said, "That's so EXPENSIVE!"

The expense of organic food depends upon the degree of refined and/or premade food one eats. If one relies upon canned soups, frozen dinners, boxed dinners, etc., then the expense really IS huge, but, if you eat like a monk and eat very low on the food chain, with measured portions of protein, fruits, vegetables, dairy products, nuts and seeds, you can eat an entirely organic diet that is LESS expensive than the customary American diet.

Take a look at my breakfast, pictured above. It cost less than $2 and was delicious! The apple and bread were organic, but the cheese was not.

Cheese is a manufactured item, and is thus, by nature, an expensive item even when not produced in an organic fashion. I will not eat the fake "cheese" - the so-called "American cheese" that was the staple of many lunches of our childhoods, however. We all remember the gelatinous thin slabs of congealed fat and artificial coloring called American cheese.

Neither do I eat non-fat cheese. There is no such thing as a cow that gives non-fat milk. Nature produces food that has a perfect balance of nutrients, fats and proteins. If we disturb that brilliant balance, the manufactured item that results is not food, per se. It resembles food. It won't kill you if you consume it. Whatever calories are present may be absorbed and used by the body, but at what cost? Just because one can consume an item without actually dying from it does not qualify it as food. Think about a penny, for instance. Unless it gets stuck somewhere in your system, it passes right through. It's not food, though.

As for me, I do not eat "non-fat" concoctions, otherwise I become terribly ill. I might as well have taken poison. I spend a lot of time in the bathroom for 24 to 48 hours. Non-fat dairy products contain a much higher percentage of lactose than natural milk, and if one has any sensitivity to lactose at all, non-fat milk will send your guts into overdrive. I do not, however, have any reaction to hard cheeses or cultured products like yogurt. My gastrointerologist told me that this is quite common.

So, going back to my original point, the less a food is fiddled with, the less expensive it is and the better it is for one's health.

I find it interesting that the way I eat is very close to the traditional monastic diet that one could find in many convents and monasteries prior to the industrial revolution and the invention of these frankenfoods to which we have become so accustomed.

Simple, wholesome and natural are the requirements, while I also am watching my serving sizes. Consequently, I have lost more than 40 pounds since bearing down on the diet.

I do not cook very much any more. If you were to look into my refrigerator, you would find very few prepared sauces and dressings. I make my own, when necessary, with the exception of mustard and mayonnaise. The onset of serious illnesses and my inability to stand for long periods of time have contributed to my move away from cooked food and towards salads and sandwiches. Once again, my disabilities have proven to be a blessing in disguise.

(When I go to a restaurant to eat, all bets are off, so to say, and I will eat whatever appeals to me at the moment. A restaurant meal is so rare, it is usually an occasion of celebration and a natural reason to let go of the monastic diet.)

Fasting is a well-known and recommended spiritual practice in many religious traditions. Simplicity and restraint with regard to food, in general, is common to many religious traditions. One of the nuns in the Hindu convent used to become enraged when I got too creative with the meals and would leave me nasty notes on the prep counter. She was right, of course, but her method of communication left something to be desired.

I have often thought about writing a book about convent cooking, but if I wait long enough, it will be unnecessary, since my cooking is becoming more and more elementary over time.

If any of my sisters in hermit life would like some ideas about recipes for the simple life, outlined above, please contact me and I will blog about it.

God bless us all!

Silver Rose Parnell
Copyright (c) 2016

REJOICING IN THE WILL OF THE LORD

After spending more than two years trying to find an appropriate hermitage that was both safe and close to doctors, shopping and my Catholic community, I have finally given up and resolved to stay where I am, make it as safe as possible, and return to writing books, with the intention of evangelizing, educating AND making some extra money to fund the PURCHASE of a small hermitage that can be outfitted to accommodate my numerous physical disabilities as well as my eventual blindness.

If the Lord had wanted me to move into another rental, we would have found something. I realized that it was God's will that I remain where I am for the time being. Many times, the will of the Lord is revealed to me by some FAILURE. Failure can serve as a beautiful message of the Lord's intentions, since nothing happens without his will or his permission.

Instead of feeling defeated by failure, I feel uplifted and joyful. The Lord has revealed at least PART of his will for me, and I feel so happy because I want nothing more fervently than to know and obey His will.

Faced with living in somewhat dangerous circumstances that do not meet my needs with regard to my disabilities, I resolved to just dig in and make the best of things. I will live with whatever I am able to endure, and I will do my best to improve the other conditions by begging for help from my Catholic friends.

The first thing I did was to have internet installed. Comcast had a special two year deal that included phone, television and internet. In order to get my writing "career" revved up again, I need access to good, fast internet. Also, I am an expert genealogist and will be open to taking genealogy research jobs, here and there, which also requires fast internet. The television gives me access to Catholic networks, the history channel, and news; while the home telephone is an added safety feature that I have been needing for some time. The cell phone service will be reduced to an emergency phone to take in the car with me on the rare occasions when I drive, which will radically reduce my usage and the cost for the cell phone.

My doctor wants me on a Mediterranean diet to address my numerous ailments, and I have resolved to follow his instruction more strictly as well as to reduce my portions, both to save money and to improve my health. The cost of the internet, cable and telephone will eat up the remainder of my food budget, so meals must be simple, albeit organic (because of asthma and allergies), and I'll have to beg for donations and/or supplies. Two of my Catholic friends have been subsidizing my diet for some time, but I will need to find some additional help. (Please don't write me and suggest the food bank. I am allergic to most of what they offer and I have had terrible luck with rancid and moldy food from them.)

Mostly, I will eat fresh organic fruits and frozen organic vegetables, brown rice, yogurt, bread and fish. My diet will closely resemble what I ate at the Hindu convent, though perhaps a bit more simple and strictly organic. I have made an Amazon wish list for food and household items that I need in this process of hunkering down and preparing for the next battle. Amazon knows my address and will mail to me directly. Otherwise, you could donate via Paypal (button on the right side of the screen.) Amazon links are at the bottom of this blog, and to the right.

Saint Jane and her husband, Dave, have already bought me a new computer, and it should arrive sometime this month. The one I am currently using is at least 8 years old. It was given to me by a neighbor who moved out of state. The screen is hanging on by a thread and is almost completely disconnected from the keyboard. It's a mess, and the software is ancient, so the time has come for a new one. (Personally, I don't like having to learn more computer programs, but it is a necessary trial.)

How do I know that writing a book is God's intention for me? I have the strong feeling that this is what He wants, but I really won't know until I finish the book and begin trying to SELL it. That is where the rubber hits the road. For myself, personally, I feel that, to the degree that I am able to support myself, I should do so. My abilities are very limited, but I should be able to get a book finished eventually. It is the last leaf on the tree I have been shaking for the last dozen years.

I won't give up my monastic routine, such as it is. Instead, I will write the book between prayer and meditation times. My heart and mind yearn to be united with Christ at all times, and I strive, in my limited ability to "pray always." Of great help is THE PRACTICE OF THE PRESENCE OF GOD by brother Lawrence of old, who said that he was equally present with the Lord amidst the pots and pans in the kitchen as he would be in the choir. He was an ordinary man with ordinary talents and a great inspiration to the rest of us ordinary people who strive to unite ourselves with the Lord.

If the sale of the book fails, then I suppose I will stop trying to do anything but PRAY and beg for my survival....like the mendicants of old.

In the meantime, I ask for your help and your prayers.

God bless us all!

Silver Rose Parnell

AMAZON WISH LISTS TO HELP ME HOBBLE THROUGH THIS PHASE:

RESEARCH AND WRITING NEEDS

WORSHIP NEEDS

FOOD, MEDICINALS AND HOUSEHOLD NEEDS