Feast of Saint Ælfgifu of Shaftesbury - May 18, 2022

 

Saint Ælfgifu of Shaftesbury

(Abt. 922-944)

My 34th Great Grandmother

Today's saint happens to be my 34th Great Grandmother, and I particularly enjoy learning about my saintly ancestors like her. I am related to her through her son, King Edgar "The Peaceful" of England. She was queen of England, married to King Edmund I of England.

Ælfgifu (also called "Elgiva") is credited with miracles that began soon after her burial at Shaftesbury. The historian Aethelweard reported that miracles had taken place at her tomb up to HIS day.  (He died in 998.) Subsequent records include her as a saint.

Historian William of Malmesbury (c. 1095 - c. 1143) reports that Aelfgifu would secretly "redeem" those who were condemned to severe judgment, she gave costly garments to the poor, made many prophecies, and had the power of healing. Apparently, she was likely in her 20's when she died. It is remarkable to see the degree to which her powers were developed for such a young person.  

I feel inspired to ask for her intercession for healing for myself and others, for several reasons in addition to her being my ancestor. She was ill for several years before her death, and as someone who suffers from chronic illness and pain, I know that she would appreciate my situation. Also, one of her miracles involved the healing of a blind man who came to her tomb shortly after her death, which speaks to my struggle with macular degeneration that has mostly blinded me in my left eye.

It delights me to be descended from many queens and saints. I would like to think there is a chance I may have inherited some of the good qualities of these people in my DNA!

CONTEMPLATION ON THE SAINTS

Throughout my day, I keep my "saint of the day" in mind and feel a connection with her or him, taking them with me during the day and feeling their presence, which influences me. Brother Lawrence and St. Teresa of Avila both used to say that they were as much in tune with the Divine while involved in the manual labor of the institution as if they were in the choir stall.

Other religious traditions say likewise, and the Buddhists have a walking meditation that reminds me of this contemplative practice.

CONTEMPLATION IN MOVEMENT

I am not a big "talker" when it comes to prayer, preferring to surrender my will to God and being present and open to Him throughout the day. Unless saying specific prayers such as the rosary, I will say prayers consisting of only a sentence or two at most. "Lord have mercy!" is a favorite. At times, I will ask for something specific, but I do try to stay focused on the job at hand while staying established in the mood of contemplation in the same moment.

CONTEMPLATIVE LIFE OUTSIDE A CONVENT

Apartment living for the city hermit presents challenges because, while I may be "immersed in thoughts of the Divine," few of the people by whom I am surrounded are likewise inclined! For instance, a couple nights ago I was disturbed in my prayers by a woman visiting my neighbor who came knocking on my door to tell me that although she knew that I "don't like it" when she blocks our cars with hers, she was going to park in the traffic lane (marked as a "no parking" zone) ANYWAY because she was only going to be there a few minutes. I asked her to park in the visitor parking but she refused, and she stayed for two and a half hours in the traffic lane.  Consequently, I was unable to get out to do an errand I had planned. This is a common occurrence.

You may well ask why this woman came to my door to announce that she was parking where it is not allowed and which she knows causes me physical pain when I am trying to wrench my recalcitrant steering wheel this way and that in the tiny space I have in which to navigate. Why, after I have explained this to her does she come and announce she will do it anyway? I haven't a clue.

LIVING IN A HOSTILE CULTURE

The aggression and selfishness of a good number of our citizens has me wondering what has happened to our society. Many of you have noticed this on social media where some folks seem to be haunted with a perpetually hostile mood that causes them to attack others in conversation threads. Often, when a stranger on Facebook discovers that I am a religious person, they sail into a diatribe against The Church, ascribing all kinds of character defects to me, based entirely upon whatever prejudice they have about religious people. It happened twice yesterday, apropos of no related topic in particular.

Yesterday I had to remove one of these people from a friend list on Facebook because she persisted in mischaracterizing my position on a topic, despite my having taken great pains to correct her several times.

The typical approach of these people is to say, "you believe X, therefore you believe Y, therefore you're horrible." I can tell them I do NOT "believe X" until I am blue in the face but they just continue to assert that I DO hold that belief. It is maddening, which is probably the point, so I 'brush the dirt from my sandals' and move on. There is no benefit in trying to reason with unreasonable people. 

It is almost as if everyone is so distracted that they do not see me, nor hear me, nor do they understand my written word, no matter how simply written. I am invisible.

Most of my contact with other humans, however, is online - but my friend list on Facebook is fairly small. There are all sorts of people on it, from young jewelry designers to nuns and monks, but the one requirement I have is that they be, at least, polite and intellectually honest, which is a challenge for some folks.  I have also noticed that the aggressive, disruptive people with the worst manners are usually women, and I wonder about that, especially when they get vulgar. But what can I do, when they just escalate out of control like little spewing tops that have been wound too tight? I bless them and release them, then move on.

The advantage of this arrangement is that the people who remain on my friend list are very special indeed. Every once in a while, I invite someone new to join us. Some stay and some go, depending on their temperament.

BEING PHYSICALLY COMPROMISED DOESN'T STOP ME

On top of an already compromised physical condition, I have been struggling with a back injury for the last couple of months, but I have been very lucky to have gotten some at-home physical therapy which will continue for another month or so and then they anticipate I will be "finished," according to the physical therapist's supervisor who visited yesterday to review my condition. I have been surprised at how just a few exercises can make such a pleasant improvement, and I am grateful for the help.

Despite this new back injury, and in addition to my spiritual disciplines of prayer and meditation,  I am working hard to become self-sufficient again, writing a novel and a collection of haiku poetry, as well as painting a miniature series of New Mexico paintings with acrylics and self-made frames and selling some jewelry that I've designed. 

But until I am able to hit on something that creates reliable income that is enough to supply my needs, I continue to require some help getting food and supplements into the household.

There are a couple things you could do, if you would like to lend a hand:

DIET AND SUPPLEMENTS MAKE A HUGE DIFFERENCE

Several doctors have prescribed an anti-inflammatory diet, along with recommended vitamins and other supplements proven to retard the progression of my chronic illnesses. Although my monthly income is less than what many people are paying for rent alone, I am not eligible for any kind of assistance with food. Our food stamp program only helps people whose income is less than about $800 a month. Many people do not realize that our social programs are VERY sparse and only the bottom third of the socio economic strata gets any kind of assistance. I worked for more than 30 years but my retirement income is less than $2,000 a month.

If you would like to assist me with bringing nutritious food and supplements into the household, donating from my Amazon wish list would be the ideal thing. They have my address and will mail to me directly:

AMAZON WISH LIST - CLICK HERE

If you prefer to send money so I can choose the vitamins and groceries I need the most, you can use the PAYPAL LINK that is the "DONATE" button that appears underneath my picture, above right.

Thank you for accompanying me on my journey. May you all be blessed!

Silver "Rose"

(C) Copyright 2022
All rights reserved.

FEAST OF ST. SIMON STOCK - MAY 16, 2022

 

Saint Simon Stock

being presented with the scapular by

the Blessed Virgin Mary

Simon Stock spent 20 years as a hermit, which is the anniversary on which my life is bearing down at the moment. February of 2023, I will have spent 20 years as a hermit, and as the days click by, I am reviewing just how much I have and have not lived up to what I had imagined I would do during this time, making me increase in humility, with a desire to do better in the next 20 years.

The life of an independent hermit, accidental or intentional, is the source of speculation for many folks who have no experience with monastic life. There are some funny assumptions and expectations by the outside world, mostly based on fantasy or wishful thinking.

Monastic life can often look like "normal" life to the untrained eye. And there is good reason for that. This isn't magic. Even the saints did not typically go flying off into the clouds, unaided by any physical contraption. They ate, they drank, they bathed, they washed the dishes, they made clothes. The thing which INFORMS the life of the independent monastic is usually invisible. What are our motivations and with what lens do we gaze out upon the world?

Some days, it is high flown mystical stuff and other days we are wondering how we can lose some weight in order to better operate within the limitations of our world.

THE HIGH FLOWN MYSTICAL STUFF

I no longer have the time to do the research and write extended biographies of the saints, besides which there are many authors who have done a good job of this over the years and my input is not needed on that score. But I do encourage you to read up about Saint Simon Stock and the scapular that he was given during his mystical vision of the apparition of Our Blessed Mother. I was invested with the scapular about a decade ago and have worn it ever since. There are certain named advantages to wearing it but you have to take care to follow the spiritual disciplines associated with it or you do not get all the benefits. I have not been good about following through with all those things, but I am working on it. I am a work in progress, in general.

WEIGHT LOSS PROJECT

In addition to the health benefits of losing some weight, my desire to lose a good amount of weight has a basis in my spiritual life. Fasting is a well known ascetic practice of monastics in many religious traditions. Anyway, I am giving it a try AGAIN and we will see if I am able to successfully get this under control, but I admit that this issue has been the bane of my existence for as long as I can remember.

I have always been a stocky person except for the years between ages 16 and 24. I remember gazing into my nearly empty closet when I was 6 years old. Hanging in it was one dress. My mother had told me that I did not deserve to have any clothes until I lost weight. No instructions were given, no special food purchased for this project, and I do not remember her cooking anything but a microwave meal except for a short period when she was married to her 4th husband and he demanded that she cook.

I was a growing girl and every bit of clothing I owned was too short, too tight, too stained and too ratty. NOTHING fit me and I was always uncomfortable.

So that dress, my favorite dress that reminded me of Alice, of "Alice in Wonderland" fame, would not have fit me even if I did lose weight because the dress was a couple years old, I was growing and it was too short for me, but I could not bear to throw it away or give it to someone because it was my favorite. I used to imagine that if I wished hard enough, I would magically "lose weight" in my sleep and when I woke up, I would fit into the dress again.

I am here to tell you that you can't pray the fat away. it does not work.

NO CONTROL OF FOOD COMING INTO HOUSE

Living on a fixed income, I can't afford a lot of the recommended foods, unless someone donates to my wish list. Cooking and cleaning the kitchen are a challenge for me, since my chronic pain and disintegration of the bones make it impossible to keep up with the chores. I was approved for a caregiver two years ago but none of the agencies have staff.  They ALL seem to be relying on relatives of the disabled and elderly to get shuttled through the agency and then get paid for taking care of the relatives they would be helping anyway. I have no family to do this.

SO - how does one diet when one has such little control over the food situation? I've decided to concentrate on the AMOUNT of food I am eating, cutting it down considerably, and relying on vitamins to take up the shortfall. I will do my best to get healthy foods into the house.

I will follow this method every day except for two: 

Most days I will have 3 meals and no snacks, but two of the meals resemble more of a snack anyway, on this plan.

On Fridays I will fast a bit more as a spiritual discipline, skipping one of the meals.

On Sundays, I will take the day off to have a "feast day" but never overdoing it - just eating until I am full.

I will do the best I can to eat the "Mediterranean Diet" that 3 of my doctors have prescribed. This diet incorporates a lot of greens, certain kinds of fish, beans, lots of olive oil, high fiber, and not a lot of bread or pasta. Nuts and seeds, certain kinds of tea and coffee, as well as other supplements, are included. I have a detailed list of what I need, based on doctors' advice. Some of it is on my DONATION WISH LIST. Amazon has my address and will mail to me direct.

The difficulty with diets is that, unlike drugs or alcohol, one HAS to eat to survive, but I am going to do the best I can to stick with this and I ask you all for your prayers to keep me on the narrow path.

By the way - if any of my readers/companions on my journey want to share their journey of the intersection of their spiritual and health endeavors, be sure and check in with us, leaving a comment at the end of this post.

IRRITATION MAKES ME WANT TO NOSH

A visitor to the apartment complex knocked on my door this afternoon to tell me that she knows I don't like it when someone parks in the "no parking zone" but she is going to do it anyway because she is "only going to be here for a little while."  I showed her where the visitor parking is and also demonstrated to her how the position of her car is completely blocking one elderly lady from leaving her garage, but this woman is selfish and self-centered and won't move. As I write this, she has been there for two hours. I could call to have her car towed but I don't want to get into it with this aggressive woman.

I noticed that, as I became irritated with the pushy woman, my inclination was to eat something. Interesting, yes? Instead, though, the first thing I did was PRAY, and now I am making myself a cup of refreshing TEA.

TELL ME YOUR DIET HACKS!

I am interested in what inspires my readers to keep the rules they have set for themselves with regard to their health goals, and particularly the weight loss journey. Anyone have any wisdom they would like to offer? How have you managed to strengthen that intersection between a spiritual fast and your health journey?

Have a beautiful evening, everyone.

Love,

Silver Rose

FEAST OF SAINT DYMPHNA, MAY 15, 2022

 

Saint Dymphna

Patroness of those suffering mental illness.

PATRON SAINT OF THE MENTALY ILL

If you have trouble with anxiety, depression, PTSD or any other mental illness, then Saint Dumphna is your gal. Her father was so crazy he agreed to marry his own daughter when his wife died and then became so obsessed with the idea that he chased her to where she had fled and killed her because she refused the preposterous (and revolting) idea.

When friends ask me how is it that I seem to have so much "bad luck," I remind them of all the saints like Dymphna who had TERRIBLE lives. Nearly every saint had an awful set of life circumstances. That is what is so inspiring about them. Despite the gross difficulties, they clung to The Lord with everything they had - their heart, soul and mind. In the process, there is much healing.

I myself have PTSD, so Saint Dymphna is a favorite of mine. The examples of saints like her are what keeps me buoyed up! I highly recommend a little meditation on the lives of the saints. Google Saint Dymphna to learn more about her.

SOME GOOD NEWS

I have noticed that my eyesight continues to improve and I am crediting it, partially, to being more disciplined with taking my vitamins and supplements, as well as eating better. Medical studies prove that these things improve a patient's chances of keeping some of their vision.  It is very expensive, though, and my Social Security is rather modest, so please consider helping me with a bit of food from my AMAZON WISH LIST

LOVING MY NEIGHBOR

One of my neighbors has Parkinson's Disease and has had it for 29 years. She is doing REMARKABLY well with it, considering how long she has had it, and she has gone even so far as to get electrodes placed in her brain to prevent the tremors from shaking her to bits.

I was coming back from the Walgreens with some Coca Cola for her, when I saw a young man drive his motorcycle up onto the grass where we are supposed to walk our dogs. I have seen his motorcycle parked there many times before, and I believe he is responsible for the deep grooves into which I have fallen and nearly broke my ankle several times. Also  he is responsible for the lamp getting pulled down, as I have seen his motorcycle chained to it many times.

LIGHT POLE ON DOG GRASS

PULLED DOWN

I was walking to my mailbox, using my wheeled walker with the nice big seat and stopped and asked him if he was one of my neighbors. He was about 6 feet tall with dark curly hair, wearing bright red plastic sunglasses.

He was very rude.

I explained that if he left his motorcycle in this spot he could have it towed away. He screamed and yelled at me, called me "dirty English," started complaining about Americans. His language was just filthy. His accent sounded Dutch or Germanic to me.

Although I was calm and restrained, fairly soft spoken, the man was just flipping out. Mostly he swore, in very vulgar language, calling me many names and making reference to my being "dirty English" or "f...ing American" and making a lot of statements about how awful Americans are.  I remember thinking that if he does not like Americans, he could go home - wherever home is, but of course I did not say that. Who knows what he would do?

I just told him, "look, I am just trying to help you." (This was not entirely true, since I was really more concerned about the ditches his motorcycle had been making in the grass for the last year or two.)

"Where the F...k am I supposed to park?" he screamed at me. I pointed out the visitor parking and then he really became incensed. More profane language ensued. He did not want to park in the visitor parking because he was convinced someone would steal his motorcycle because there was nothing to tie it to.

It is usually not a good idea to escalate this sort of thing, so I did not reciprocate, but as he continued to scream and swear at me, I did ask him, "do you talk to your grandmother like that?" He stopped for a moment. He must have had a nice grandma.

I went to my mailbox and then started back toward my apartment, walking slowly with my little wheeled walker. He apologized to me but then went right back to screaming and swearing at me. I don't know what made him become so unhinged.

So far, I had seen him park there only on Sunday in the late afternoon and at no other time. It was some kind of appointment, and perhaps he wasn't even visiting someone in this complex. It occurred to me that perhaps he works somewhere cloe by and he became unhinged because he was expected somewhere at a particular time and was pressed for time. Perhaps that was it.

Anyway, he put the chain into a little case on the side of the motorcycle and drove off the property. It occurred to me that, considering he had such an inappropriate response to my mild-mannered approach, perhaps he also has some mental illness.

Dear Saint Dymphna, please protect, soothe and heal everyone with mental illnesses that is either temporary or a permanent feature of their psyche!

Silver Rose

Copyright(c) 2022
All rights reserved.

P.S. Please do not forget my Amazon wish list that incorporates the many things that are prescribed for the various illnesses that assail me! CLICK HERE

If you prefer not to have to choose which items are purchased, then go to my PAYPAL link, that says "DONATE" above right of this blog post.

FEAST OF OUR LADY OF FATIMA, 2022

 

The thing I particularly love about the Fatima apparitions is that they were witnessed by multiple people. In the case of the picture, above, which appeared in a newspaper of the day, in 1917, thousands of people witnessed "The Miracle of the Sun" for which there was advance notice...thus the presence of all these people who watched the sun dance in the sky.

I understand skepticism about apparitions, especially some of recent note that appeared to be somewhat shady - but what about a miracle witnessed in the modern age by thousands of people and reported on by the media? What about that?

My personal "take" on miracles is they usually happen to strengthen the faith and the resolve of the people. I suppose they serve to interest others in the spiritual life, but for me, it gives me something to hold onto in my dark days.

Lately, I am having some dark days. Lots of pain, the disabilities are making it more and more difficult for me to move around, and I cannot do many things I used to be able to do. I fight off an uncharacteristic depression, and thinking about the miracle of the sun really helps to buoy my spirits.

FORTUNATELY, I can still write and paint. I am working on that novel and organizing my painting table so that I can start painting the series of small paintings from some photographs I have taken that feature the Southwestern sky.

I AM RESURRECTING THE JEWELRY MAKING: When I lived in Northern California, I used to sell necklaces that featured gemstones. I am now learning wire-wrapping and plan to be selling my things at a local store that takes their wares to an art show on the weekends. I will also sell to personal friends and readers of my blog who show interest. When I have a few things produced, I will post them here and on Facebook.

THE HOUSE IS IN CHAOS, however. I have tried for so long to get some help cleaning, and except for a few visits from a kind friend who brought me groceries and paper goods and did some of my dishes, I have no help. (You have heard this song before.) If I sell the novel and if it does well (likewise with the jewelry) I may make enough money to move into a more appropriate situation and pay for some help in the house.

BUYING A PROPERTY AND SHARING IT WITH OTHER RELIGIOUS LADIES had been my dream for years, but I am obviously having to scale back my dreams and goals. I will be 68 this year so, while I AM slowing down with age and pain, I have lots of plans for the future. I just have to make sure they are reasonable, attainable goals.

IN THE MEANTIME, IT IS TIME TO FLOG THE WISH LIST AGAIN: I try really hard to be as independent as possible, but there is only so much I can do. I regularly "fall behind" with food and vitamin items, so I offer here a link to my wish list:

WISH LIST FOR FOOD & HOUSEHOLD

THANKS SO MUCH to my readers for your help throughout the years. As you know, "the government" does not do much toward helping senior ladies like me. It is one of America's dirty little secrets. I have a couple friends here in town who help me whenever they possibly can, but I hate to have them burdened with me and hope that others will chip in a little bit.

I suppose if I had not been written out of my father's will after he got Alzheimer's or if I had been married to a financially stable man rather than spending most of my time as a monastic, things would be different for me, but we must deal with what IS, right?

With the observance of the feast day of Our Lady of Fatima, I feel confident it will all work out. I am being watched over and protected, and all of YOU are part of that.

God bless us all!

Silver "Rose" 

DIRTY-DEALING MERCHANTS RAMP UP CROOKED CONTRACT SCAMS DURING COVID

 

Cathedrale Saint-Maclou de Pontoise

SAINT OF THE DAY:

Today, May 10, is the feast day of Saint William of Pontoise, a Benedictine hermit who lived in Pontoise, France in the 12th century. We don't know much about Saint William, except that he was a Benedictine hermit that came to this Abbey that another saintly monk named Walter had established. (Walter's tomb is quite lovely!) William evidently attracted some people around him, and the Abbey of Saint Martin drew a crowd, as so many of these saints will cause to do. It usually isn't deliberate on their part. We humans are hungry for inspiration.

Today I am going to discuss several contract scams and situations that have been wasting my time. They represent a trend that has intensified over the last two years of Covid. I suggest that Covid has caused some economic stresses to which some merchants are responding with dishonest scams and tricks and traps. When they are caught in them, they are so insistent upon retaining the ill-gotten gains that they remind me of Smeagol from The Lord of the Rings.

 

LET ME CATCH YOU UP!

This is the type of mobility scooter I use.

WHAT HAS BEEN HAPPENING LATELY:

As mentioned in my last post, I took quite a break from writing this blog. It is starting up again, but I will be doing far less research and other time-consuming writing, and I will be less formal. I do not have the time to edit and streamline, so the posts will be longer, stream of consciousness, and with fewer pictures.

Some posts are written primarily for documentation purposes and for the typical purpose of anyone who writes a diary. I don't even know where that impulse comes from, but I have found it helpful to go back over entries from the past, so I am just doing this without wracking my brain trying to figure it out.

Today, the electricity is out for the second time in the last few days, I did not get much sleep last night, and I am having trouble getting out of my chair, so I spent some time on this post. 

I am PROBABLY exhausted because of having to fighting with these mercenaries.  Read on!

THE CAREGIVER SCAM:

Whenever I read anything about another religious hermit or solitary, a fleeting wish rushes into my conscious mind that if I was not disabled, I could do a much better job of this hermit life! But perhaps it is better that I am not too inspiring, otherwise there would be too many people in this little apartment.

Anyway, I often wish I was better. Between the mobility issues and the semi-blindness, keeping up with just the daily tidying up around here has gotten to be a huge challenge, especially since there is NO help to be had.

Supposedly, I was to receive caregiver assistance but every single agency that has been approved to supply it tells me they do not have anyone to send and they don't even have a waiting list because their current clients are not getting all their hours. Most of them ask me, "don't you have a relative you could bring?" I have learned that a sizeable percentage of the clients bring their own staff WITH them in the form of family members who would be caring for them anyway. They're glad to get an extra $9 or $10 an hour for something they had been doing for free, but the numerous unrelated people I've asked have ALL demanded cash, which defeats the purpose. Besides - it is illegal and we could ALL get in trouble for that.

The general citizenry believes that the government is supplying ALL the help that poor people need, but it is just a mirage - like so many scams being run at the moment. Covid has exacerbated a situation that already existed 2 years ago when I got approved for assistance.

About three weeks ago, I made my last concerted effort to get some help in here. I called the Blue Cross Blue Shield Care Coodinator. She could not do anything. She and her supervisor think about me every day. I called Medicaid and they said it wasn't THEIR concern that the agencies were not staffing anyone. They suggested I call Blue Cross Blue Shield. Someone suggested I call the Insurance Board (not sure of the name, it is written here somewhere) and THEY said they only get involved in things if there is some fraud or in matters having to do with insurance companies not paying. They said I had to call Medicaid, so I was back at square one. When you call Medicaid, you get put on hold for 45 minutes. I kid you not, but I DID call Medicaid again and they suggested I contact the Governor's office, which I did.

THAT is when people lost their blinken minds. I got calls from all sorts of different people. First it was the Aging and Long Term Services people. They couldn't help me but they contacted someone else who contacted someone else who contacted someone else.

FINALLY, it ended up back in MY lap (predictably!)  The Care Coordinator at Blue Cross Blue Shield told me I was to have a meeting with her and the agency director so that they could school me about what services I could expect to receive, even though she knew FULL WELL how terribly well educated I am about this. (This was not her idea. Someone in that demented phone tree told her to do it.)

Then she mentioned that I was not allowed to tell caregivers that they could not use their phones in my home. This was RIGHT ON THE HEELS of the agency having "sent" me a woman who informed me that she had gout and could not stand and that she would be watching Netflix movies and reading kindle books on her phone! Because of the GOUT, she said she was not able to stand very much and when I explained to her that the dishes and the laundry and all that required that she DO stand, she bowed out of the job.  I asked her, "are you sure you don't want to give it a try?" and she definitely DID NOT.

Apparently, this caregiver became available because her client had ended up in a nursing home because the caregiver just sat around all day and watched movies unless the client specifically ASKED her for something. The poor woman was lucky to get a sandwich.

I ask you: is any of this my fault?

The task ahead is another phone call to the governor's office because they have not answered my second phone call yet.  I do not know if I can face it today, but I will have to do it SOMEDAY because this is not an issue that affects me alone. Anyone who is in my position, i.e., without family assistance, will be moldering away in their apartment with the detritus piling up to their earlobes.

THE VCA PET HOSPITAL SCAM:

Mr. Charlemagne

My charming service dog

A year and a half ago, Charlemagne the Magnificent needed dental work done, so I signed him up for a doggie care program at VCA WEST MESA. The program is called VCA CARES. The first year went off without a hitch, then they sent me an email in September of 2021 telling me that they were renewing the plan starting in November and that it was going to cost me $83.99 a month, which they took from my account for the next six months. Twice after the renewal of the plan, they sent me emails urging me to use the dental benefit of the plan, and I got around to making the appointment for mid April.

The day of the dental surgery, I got up at the crack of dawn and took him down there, after taking him into the office a few days before that for his pre-dental tests.  IMAGINE my shock when VCA presented me with a HUGE BILL for the dental, telling me that I did not have dental coverage on my plan! Apparently, some incompetence and/or computer glitch or SOMETHING had switched my dog from one plan to another, without advising me.  Yet they had still sent me those emails urging me to use the dental benefit, so the whole thing mystifies me.

To date, I have yet to get any kind of explanation that is not some type of nonsensical word salad.

Now, if they had apologized for their goof and offered to make it right and do the dental cleaning, as promised, I would have been fine with it. If they had, instead, offered to reimburse me for the six months of payments I had made while under the impression that I was under the same plan I signed up for, I would have been fine with that. But they decided that they did not want to be out of pocket for any of their mistake. They expected ME to pay for it. Their solution was that I should pay between $850.00 to $1,250.00 for the dog's dental cleaning. Or I could "eat" the last 6 months payments, buy another contract for more money, and proceed from there.

I never would have signed up for a care plan that did not include dental. Besides which, those ancillary services like vaccinations can be gotten for little to nothing at local charities and low-cost animal clinics, especially for disabled senior ladies.

Fortunately, I have had extensive experience working in law offices, a good portion of which was in a contract law firm so I am familiar with the laws. You cannot indebt a person for a contract they do not know they have. Simple. You cannot make a change to an existing contract without giving knowledge and getting consent from the person being indebted by it. Period.

The office manager for VCA West Mesa was rather arrogant and convinced that nothing and no one was going to make her do the right thing. The people in the Los Angeles office behaved likewise. I filed a complaint with the New Mexico Attorney General's office and some guy at VCA in Los Angeles offered to give me $200 "as a courtesy!" 

Criminal con artists have no shame. They are often the most arrogant, self-important, bloviating smarty-pants on the playground.

I contacted my bank, sent them the copies of the emails I received from VCA and they did a charge-back of the full amount. I also put a stop-payment on the monthly charge.

Even though the manager of VCA WEST MESA had agreed to cancel the contract (which really does not need her permission to do, since an agreement did not actually exist), they STILL attempted to deduct money from my bank account on the 4th of this month, on which day I received a flurry of emails demanding payment - if you can believe THAT! Oh...and they were adding a $25.00 charge for their inconvenience!) WHAT NERVE.

SOMETIMES I WISH I WAS LIVING IN A CONVENT

One of the advantages of living in a convent atmosphere, as opposed to going it alone in an apartment, is that the institution stands between the individual and any business people with which the convent has to conduct worldly affairs. It makes it easier. Unfortunately, I have nothing to offer a convent except my prayers because I am both poor and disabled.

Here I am, sitting in front of the swami.

I am in my early to mid 30's in this photo and a

member of the Hollywood "Sarada Convent"

You may not realize it, but most convents have the same rationale as any other business looking to hire a worker - except nuns do not get a salary. At the Hindu convent, we had one lovely older nun who joined when she was 50 - which was 20 years OLDER than the outside limit - but she arrived with a lot of lovely money, and she paid to purchase a beautiful mansion for the nuns. If you do not have money, you have to have physical stamina because of all the physical work that is generally required. On top of that, there are the obvious other requirements. One day I will write about it.

XFINITY MOBILE:

The XFinity agents who spoke to me at the office when I originally signed up for the service lied to me and sold me service in an area where there was a service issue they knew about. I spent months not receiving my phone calls. About 3 out of every 4 went straight to voice mail and the call never appeared on the phone history. It was maddening, especially now when people do not answer the phone in many companies and they tell you they are going to call you back. After months and months of hours and hours of "troubleshooting," including trading in the phone for a new one, resetting the network, etc., they FINALLY admitted to me that that there was a known issue in my neighborhood. Several of my neighbors confirmed they too were having problems making any phone calls at all.

The guy at the corporate office told me that if I paid some extra money he would release the phone so I could go elsewhere, but as soon as the payment went through, while we were on the phone, he immediately reneged! He said, "Oh, gee, it looks like your phone was on a promotion and I have to get permission...." and then word salad ensued. We had an appointment for a few days afterward and he stood me up, then I left messages on his phone every day for a week and he ghosted me. I finally got in touch with him and he was very unpleasant. When I called him on it, he doubled down. Then he denied having made the promise to unlock the phone. 

When I told him that we were just going to have to listen to the audio of our conversations, he went nuts. Probably because he knew that the audio would show that he had been lying.  He was abusive and I hung up on him and never spoke to him again. I tried to report him for his behavior but they give you the runaround at that company.

I waited on going to a new service for two weeks because I could not afford to buy another phone and I wanted them to unlock the phone I had but they kept refusing, saying I had to wait until another 2 weeks went by. At that point, who really knew what to expect? So I indebted myself for yet another phone with CRICKET, which has GREAT service, very nice agents, and uncomplicated procedures. I just HAD to be reachable by phone. A disabled lady cannot afford to have bad phone service, and the calls were being dropped constantly.

I kept calling XFinity, though, because I STILL needed to get that phone unlocked. I did not want to run the risk of losing the unlock code in the time between leaving that service and using that phone again. 

I kept asking them to unlock the phone, per our agreement. They refused to do it for a full FOUR WEEKS. It was maddening. Finally, the last agent agreed to ASK for the phone to be unlocked and I had to wait several days to receive an email. According to him, he had to get permission from SAMSUNG. I don't know what THAT is all about because I got the phone from XFinity!

According to this last person, NONE of the other agents had recorded that I had requested the phone to be unlocked when that was the ONLY reason I had called over the final 4 weeks. It became obvious to me that the agents tell you one thing and then document SOMETHING ELSE so that is why the agent at the corporate office had gone ballistic on me when I suggested that we were going to have to listen to the audio.

Every agent has a different story also. They ALL give you a line and it is impossible to tell what the truth is.

So, there is a lot of lying going on. I am pretty sure they stretch out the time between the day you make the big payment until the day they unlock the phone so they can pressure you to stay.  It was a nightmare.

It reminded me of my experience working for MCI when I first got to Albuquerque more than 20 years ago. I was desperate to get a job as soon as possible so I took this telephone service phone sales job and while I was working there, I heard agents lying CONSTANTLY to potential customers. I would report it to their pod manager and the manager would do NOTHING about it. As long as they were selling, the managers did not care. It was shocking to me.

There are some businesses that regularly cheat and connive,  and then there are businesses that have become a little shady due to the pressures of Covid. There is a small grocery store in town that removes the expiration date clip from the neck of the bread bag and replaces it with a plain wire from the produce department. I took a chance on one loaf and it was obvious when I got it home that it was stale. I had to put it in the freezer and take it out one piece at a time and toast it.

But regardless of whether the business regularly cheats people or is succumbing to the pressures of Covid, I pray for them all. I pray for the people who are abusive on the phone. I pray for the people who lie, especially because Satan is the father of all lies. When someone lies to me, I almost worry about them, in a sense, because I know the price that we pay, spiritually, when we lie.  It is a terrible price to pay.

I encourage you also to pray for those that hurt you, lie to you and try to steal from you. There is a lot of that going on in the world today.

"Silver Rose"

Silver Cottage Hermitage

Copyright (C) 2022

All rights reserved.

WHAT DOES "PRO-LIFE" MEAN?

In the confirmation hearings of very recent memory, the candidates basically took the position that Roe v. Wade was a matter of established law and, as such, it would not be touched. But as soon as they locked down the job, they immediately began working to set Roe aside. We know this because of the draft position paper recently leaked. 

Wild controversy has ensued. There is a nagging feeling in the back of my mind that the leaking of this document may have been meant to distract from something ELSE of even greater import, but I do not know what that may be, at this point, and can't speak to that.  The first thing that aggravated me, of course, is that the candidates LIED during the hearings. They manipulated the process in order to gain power - always a terrible sign. 

Lying bugs me, no matter where I find it. Satan is a murderer and the father of all lies, according to scripture. Wherever we find lies, something evil is present, to one degree or another.

Some people think that the ends justifies the means, but it is strictly against Catholic theology to use lies to gain a "holy" purpose, and probably every other religion as well. This is NOT a good start, but what can we expect from a political party, the GOP, that is always shrieking about the Democrats supposedly "packing" the court when it is they who have done it instead. The cognitive dissonance makes my head hurt.

Anyone familiar with my political perspective, by the way, knows full well that I am not a tribal devotee of any political party. I vote according to my spiritual values, my logic and my common sense, keeping in mind the predominately secular nature of our government that was created by people who had a horror of the theocracies of Europe. I can just as easily criticize democrats, and have done so in the past, but it is the GOP that is filling the air waves with conspiracy theories, lies and insurrection nonsense at the moment and, whatever defects exist in the Democrat talking points, the Republicans are currently FAR worse. Their talking points are just bizarre. 

I mention my lack of tribal affiliation so that my comments about this topic can be absorbed with the understanding that I actually do not have a dog in this fight and my position is not strictly elephant nor jackass.

First, let me say I am "pro-life." What I mean by that will be made clear.

Making abortion illegal is only one method of attempting to support life and avoid death. "Pro-life" is not encompassed by this one method. When I say I am "pro-life" I mean that I am a believer in a consistent, global approach that takes into account all aspects of creating and maintaining a culture that encourages and supports life! Life is wonderful, but not simple. 

Abortions were illegal but routinely available before Roe v. Wade, but they were dangerous and not only killed the baby but sometimes the mother as well. At times, the mother's future fertility was affected. If they are made illegal once more, they will revert to being done in less ideal conditions, as before. The only people who may not be able to have abortions will be girls who are too young to travel to a place where an abortion may be had, and/or women who are too poor to afford it.  

I well remember the years before ROE, and this is the way it was then, and is probably the way it will shake down after ROE is put down. BUT there is one fairly new element in the mix that was not in place before Roe. The "pro life movement" has become hyper organized. They are laser focused on making it illegal and do not appear to be interested in any other method. To them, making abortion illegal IS the sum total of what "pro life" means. When I have engaged in conversation with any of the self-proclaimed "pro life warriors" about other methods, I get attacked and called names. People pile on in a frenzy of fury. It is really quite something. Obviously, not everyone is like this. I have close friends who are convinced that making it illegal is THE thing to do, but they know I am pro-life in my own way and they don't resort to calling me names or harassing me about this topic. They recognize that I disagree about method and not about the goal.

I don't have to be psychic to accurately predict that the FIGHTING will continue, because people who are NOT pro-life and people who frame this issue as one of bodily autonomy are not going to stop fighting against the illegality. The "pro-life" crowd that has wedded itself to ONE failed method of supposedly supporting life will not stop EITHER. The whole thing is pointless. I have watched the controversy swing back and forth over the last 60 years in which I have been aware of it

It is distressing that few people seem prepared or interested in understanding the point of view of the opposite side. And they are pretty nasty about it on social media com boxes, calling one another names and insinuating awful things about the other.  The caustic and sometimes vulgar rudeness is intolerable. Also useless, since no progress can be made without coming to some understanding.

Because I am a convert and because my point of view has developed over the years, I have been on both sides of this debate and I feel I understand and sympathize with both with regard to the discussion about whether or not abortion should be legal. What I do NOT feel is hostility for either "side" because I see the immense suffering that persons on each side are feeling. I wish there was something I could do to help, so that LIFE could actually be supported and everyone could stop fighting about a method which, historically, has limited to no benefit.

People who gravitate toward the "force and punishment" model of government behave as if making abortion illegal is all they need to do to create a "pro life" culture in the U.S. and then they can just kick back and act like the job is done. When I point out that abortions will go on anyway, they typically devolve into angry litanies of resentment-filled rhetoric that makes it clear that they are much more interested in punishment than in the actual results. Yesterday, when I mentioned that women would get abortions ANYWAY but that they would be dangerous and may risk their lives, a pro-life warrior told me that "abortions are not supposed to be safe." This person did not care that the woman might die. He was much more interested in punishment. OBVIOUSLY not a "pro life" point of view.

For those on the right, only the baby inside her matters, while extremists on the left behave as if only the mother's life matters. But I insist that BOTH matter and we must serve the needs of both.

My experience of this topic, personally, has led me to believe that a freewheeling lifestyle of sex outside of marriage is damaging to women, men, families - everyone, really. At some point in my life, my personal approach became one in which I avoid sex outside of marriage. It sounds antiquated to many people, but it worked for me. 

I realize our culture is adamantly opposed to restraining the sex urge, and I am not saying that my method should be forced on anyone, but I rather think that "choice" actually comes long before the woman becomes pregnant. That is how I look at it for myself, personally. It took me a long time to come to this point of view and I understand those who do not share it.

I am a pragmatic person trying to talk into a topic dominated by ideologs. Most of the people who have some investment in this topic seem to be firmly entrenched in one of two positions. Even many "religious" people whose religion demands restraint of the sex urges are adamantly opposed to obeying those precepts about restraint of the sex urge. I WAS one of those people, many years ago. It did not work out well for me. This is why it became OBVIOUS to me that you can't legislate morality and expect everyone to just obey. They are not going to do it.

Just because I think that making abortion illegal is pointless does NOT mean I am pro-abortion or that I am a libertine. Far from it. I am tired of people demanding that I defend positions I have not taken, which is why I am posting THIS hot topic today. Next time someone calls me a "baby killer" I will refer them to this essay.

Instead of trying to force into use a method that never worked, I suggest we try, instead, one of the many other methods of creating a pro-life culture, so that, even if abortion remains legal, hardly anyone would take advantage of it because America could be a resoundingly "pro-life" culture.

We could follow the examples of other, less prosperous nations that manage to give paid maternity and paternity leave to the parents, as well as paid child care and health care to call their citizens. (No, they are not "socialist" countries I am speaking of. Most are democracies and countries that operate on some sort of capitalist system.)

Paying every worker a living wage that is enough to feed, clothe, house, and medicate a family while enabling some savings toward the purchase of homes used to be the American standard. Instead, the wages of the people who do the actual work are suppressed, and the value of what they create is shuttled up the ladder so that the CEOs have become little potentates who actually take vacations in outer space while their workers who created the wealth barely have enough to put food on the table. Compound this situation with a tax structure that has become entirely unfair, protecting the rich and impoverishing everyone else, and we have a recipe for disaster  - not "pro life" by any stretch of the imagination.

If all of this were cured and we actually were doing something toward making our culture a culture of life, we could have an abortuary on every corner and the halls would be empty - or nearly so. The legal status of abortions is NOT what drives them! Women do not have abortions because they are available. They have abortions because they cannot afford to do otherwise.

Once we have done EVERYTHING we can do to create a pro-family culture, beginning with the ways I have mentioned, above, only then should we consider making abortion illegal and only if the other methods have not resulted in a radical downturn in the numbers. At that point, some version of making abortion illegal would have to be considered, and we should start first with some limitations, such as limiting them to the first trimester. BUT I say this only to "cover all the bases" because I actually do not think that abortions will remain high in numbers if and when we create a family friendly environment. There will be some, of course, but it is a better than what is happening now. 

MOST women report that they chose abortion because of financial realities. I am pretty sure we can create a situation in which abortions are rarely necessary. Rape, incest, and the health of the mother are naturally going to be situations which most people would agree would be exceptions. Also, there are medical conditions that actually prohibit the survival of the baby but endanger that of the mother if allowed to go to full term.

In any case, the use of force that impinges on the rights of women over their own bodies has to be our LAST resort - not our first. There are TWO human persons present in a pregnant woman.  We can't ignore either one of them.

Obviously, I think that this issue is a whole heck of a lot more nuanced than most people seem to believe, and that is too bad, because this is one of those issues for which we need to be able to meet one another in a calm, respectful dialog that takes into account the needs of ALL persons. I pray we can find some way to do that.

Bless us all and God save us

THE SEVEN YEAR CYCLE - UPDATE

 

"Appearances"

by

Silver S. Parnell

Copyright (c) 1996, all rights reserved.

My entire life has been devoted in a search for the Divine. No matter what my employment happened to be at the moment, my vocation has always been that of the spiritual seeker. 

When I was 11, I was corresponding with the Carmelite nuns in Carmel, California (much to the ire of my Catholic-hating mother!) In my late teens, I spent time with L. Ron Hubbard on his "Sea Organization Flagship." I studied Nicheren Shoshu Buddhism for a short while in my late teens, but found the chanting was not as mentally stimulating and spiritually inspiring as I would have hoped.

I had no religious input in my childhood, but as soon as I left home at barely 17, I entered onto the mystical and contemplative path, and I have loved every minute of it and I have learned a LOT about many different religions and philosophies, concentrating, for the most part, on Vedanta style contemplation which can be suited to any religion, really. The object of one's contemplation is what is key. Catholics will focus on Christ or God the Father or the Holy Spirit or Mary. Vedantists may fixate on Ramakrishna or another saint. The possibilities are  endless because contemplation and meditation are techniques.

I keep hearing from people that they believe that meditation is the process of "emptying your mind," but my meditation lessons with the Buddhists and the Hindus do not resemble that at all.

I have been blessed and extremely grateful to keep company with remarkable people like Zen Master, Roshi Prabhasa Dharma, beloved friend of blessed memory - and Swami Swahananda, probably the most influential person in my life, with whom I practiced and studied the mystical life of the Vedantic Hindus. When he allowed me to take the final sannyasa vows and gave me the monastic name of "Kaliprana", it was the happiest day of my life. Later, I became enamored of the Catholic mystics and began to trod that path. It has been a wonderful, rich, journey - full of joy and hope.

Swami Swahananda

My Hindu (Vedanta) teacher

About seven years ago, another Vedantist encouraged me to write a blog, as a way of gaining support. I have not received much "support" but writing this blog has helped give me an incentive to study my favorite saints and get back in the habit of writing on a daily basis. In the process, this HAS helped me develop research and writing techniques, as well as fed my soul with the examples of female mystics through the ages. Eventually, I began to feel fairly competent and realized that my lifelong writer's block with which I had struggled terribly, had been eased by the process of writing almost 400 blog posts.

At some point, I intend to take all the information I have gathered during my research for these blog posts and write a book about the rather more "unknown saints," accompanied by my own paintings of them. In the meantime, I was afraid that the posts themselves, which are a running diary of my days seen through the lens of saints who have feasts on those days, might be somewhat stale. I reverted them to draft state until I had a chance to review them and have decided to leave them "as is." They reflect what they are - a diary of thoughts, prayers, musings and research conducted over the years. The character of this blog will change and it will certainly be added to less frequently, but what has gone before will remain.

I am entering into a new phase. I have lost most of the vision in my left eye, due to macular degeneration, and the right eye is likewise threatened. I am faced with having to get shots in my one good eye in an attempt to retard the progress of the disease. The doctors tell me that I have to get a lot better nutrition than I have mostly gotten during all these poverty years and take some vitamins and supplements that I have not been able to afford. (More about that later.)

When I first became disabled, I had a vision of what my monastic life would look like, but, gradually, over the decades since I took monastic vows, It has been pretty much impossible to maintain a proper monastic schedule because most of my time is spent in the laborious process of dragging myself through my painful days and caring for the body which has begun to fail. The mind, however, is still fresh, and I have reverted to living my monastic vocation in imitation of Brother Lawrence, who said that he was as much with the Lord, among his pots and pans, as he would have been if he'd been talented enough to chant in a choir stall. My mind rests with the Lord, and "walking meditation" has become my constant habit.

I practice the presence of God. Lately, I have begun the habit of chanting the Angelus in Latin. The ideal is to do this three times a day, but I admit to being only able to do it twice, due to wretched insomnia that keeps me up all night. I also pray the Jesus Prayer of the Orthodox Church, as well as the Rosary of Mother Mary and Chaplets for various saints. Also, the Chaplet of Our Lady of Sorrows.

Blessed Mother Mary and Baby Jesus

by

Silver S. Parnell

Copyright (c) 2020, All rights reserved

Becoming a hermit was an afterthought. I never aspired to it. But circumstances forced me into that role and I have done the best I could with it over the last two decades. I hope that all the prayers and the pains that I have offered up on behalf of the world have found favor with The Lord.

Mystic Saint

by

Silver S. Parnell

Copyright (c)1996

All rights reserved

I have not even been able to have a caregiver in the house to help me because the agencies have no caregivers to send, except for the occasional ne'er do well who has had to produce a paycheck to show the court that she is working and thereby will get one step closer to getting her children back from the state. 

These people that occasionally appeared stole from me, harassed me and tried to push me around. Even the daughter of friends of mine managed to "disappear" some of my belongings, including a glass candle shade that belongs on my shrine, though I have no clue how she did that! Perhaps there is something about vulnerability that is too much of a temptation for people, or maybe she broke it and secretly threw it away and was ashamed to admit it.

I have also discovered that for some people, thievery is a way of life. Even when it risks much more than they gain by it, they steal.  It is an ingrained habit, apparently. So, it is perhaps better not to have anyone come into the house to help me. I will struggle along by myself, as I have done for more than 20 years.

A good friend of mine came by several times to get my dishes cleaned up. Since then, as a method of reducing the number of dirty dishes, I have resorted to eating frozen prepared meals because my back and knees cannot stand for cooking and cleaning.

At the same time, my Social Security income is really not enough to address my needs, and I have to try to improve my financial situation before I lose the rest of my vision. I am writing a novel, which I hope to be adapted to a film after publication. (I grew up in the film industry and wrote for television in my early 20's, so I am prepared for the pitfalls.) I also have plans for a series of paintings of New Mexico, my adopted state, and there is the possibility of a small limited line of art jewelry on the side, sold in a local store or online. I will have to see about that. 

These creative projects don't require that I adapt myself to any schedule and can be done when I am feeling well enough to sit and do them. These days, a week might go by when I am not able to do anything but get myself fed and bathed. The pain cycle has its ups and downs, often in response to the weather.

Lunch at the Vedanta Convent

during one of Swami's visits.

About 1989

A monastic schedule, on the other hand, is a more rigorous daily set of hours dedicated to specific spiritual disciplines. I can no longer pretend that my inability to keep to a schedule is TEMPORARY or that my health is likely to improve. Instead, my illnesses and syndromes are steadily worsening, and whatever efforts I make to improve the situation seem only to lessen the degree to which my health is going downhill.

I don't intend to change my lifestyle. I won't be going for boyfriends or husbands. You won't find me hanging out in bars or sitting through concerts. I will remain at home but I will give up the struggle to meet the requirements of a typical monastic schedule because I just can't do it any more.

The Lord will accompany me, as He always has, and it will be alright. I can still keep my mind occupied with Him in whatever activity I find myself. 

THE PLAN, GOING FORWARD

Originally, I had decided not to write this blog any more, but I have since realized that what I need to do is to cut down on the more ambitious elements of it. For instance, the research of the lives of the saints, for which I wrote quite a few biographies. That isn't necessary for an online diary that is, by definition, an account of things that have happened in the author's life - not in the life of someone who lived 500 years ago, or some such.

I have kept diaries constantly throughout my life, I enjoy doing it, and there is no reason I shouldn't keep it up - at least in a more modest form. It helps me come to grips with the daily challenges and is helpful to keep my writing abilities honed a bit. So - I will write when I feel inspired, and I am going to try to keep it more brief. Let's see how successful I am!

MY HEALTH COULD USE SOME HELP!

In addition to the wide-ranging arthritic conditions, the macular degeneration that is robbing me of my vision has been proven to respond to special diet and supplements, most of which I can not afford, and I have a wish list on Amazon for food, visual aids, and some necessary household items. Amazon has my address and will mail to be direct. Follow the link below, and it will be self-explanatory:

AMAZON WISH LIST

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO GET IN TOUCH WITH ME:

Please feel free to leave a comment on this blog and I will be notified. You are also welcome to contact me on my Facebook page.

Here is the link to my Facebook profile:

FACEBOOK - CONTACT ME HERE

God bless you all.

Silver S. Parnell

Copyright (c) 2021
All rights reserved.

SAINT MELITINA - SEPTEMBER 15

 

Saint Melitina

Today's saint is a woman about whom we know almost nothing except that she died sometime in the 2nd century, she was a virgin and a martyr. My guess is that she was likely very young, as were most of the martyrs in this era....at least the ones we know about.

I believe she is one of only two female saints on a day when there are more than a dozen celebrated on the official Catholic calendar. Some days, the paucity of female saints and the tiny bit of information available about those few women, irritates me. At worst, it depresses.

SAINT EANSWIDA AND THE MOST HOLY NAME OF MARY - SEPTEMBER 12

 

Saint Mary's Church

Folkestone

Bones of the saint found here

Also known as Eanswythe or Eanswith, she was the first female monastic in all of England, establishing a convent at Folkestone England in the 7th century.  She was the daughter of Kind Eadbald of Kent and, like most daughters of kings, she was sought as a marriage partner. In fact, a pagan prince came to Kent to ask her father for her hand, but she, of course, refused. These saintly ladies wanted nothing to do with marriage, most of them. 

Eanswida remained at her abbey her entire life, but her monastery was abandoned before the 10th century, as it had begun to be disintegrated by the action of the ocean waves. An attempt was made to rebuild it in 1095, but that also proved to be no match for the sea.

Folkestone Priory, a new foundation in this area, was established in 1137, and I believe it is still there. In fact, I seem to remember a Facebook acquaintance mentioning it, as she lived in that town, a lovely quaint English town. Of course, the priory went the way of the rest of the Catholic establishments in England and is now part of the Church of England, Folkestone Parish Church.

Recent osteoarcheology has found the bones of this young saint, who died in her early 20's, and studies are ongoing, which is rather exciting. I am including a link to an article in THE GUARDIAN about how her bones were found:

GUARDIAN ARTICLE OF THE DISCOVERY OF HER BONES

I am related to her, marginally, as I am to most of the obscure English saints that are descended from nobility. There was so much intermarriage, you know, that I am a cousin to myself 100 times over, as are many Americans whose ancestors arrived in this country from England in the 17th century.

THE FEAST OF THE MOST HOLY NAME OF THE MOST BLESSED VIRGIN MARY

Today is also a Marian Feast Day celebrating the Most Holy Name of the Most Blessed Virgin Mary and there is a lot of information online about it.

Silver Rose

SAINT ROSE OF LIMA - AUGUST 23

 

Saint Rose of Lima

[b. Isabel Flores de Oliva]

(1586-1617)

Patron of Latin America and the Philippines

Saint Rose of Lima is one of the saints I love and, although a few days will have passed before I have the time to finish this blog post, thereby "missing" her feast day of August 23, I am going to write about her nonetheless.

Born in Lima to a Creole mother and a Portuguese-born father of no particular distinction, a member of the cavalry of the day, Isabel Flores de Oliva developed into an intensely religious child. Even in infancy, there were remarkable signs attendant on her. A servant saw the child's face turn into a rose and told everyone of this so that it became her nickname, which she took formally when she was confirmed in The Faith.

Catherine of Sienna captured the young girl's imagination, and she tried to copy her ascetic practices, such as fasting three days a week. There were also "severe penances" practiced in secret, behind closed doors. I am not sure what those practices were and how anyone knew of them, but in any case, this is where any similarity between myself and this lovely saint quickly falls by the wayside because, aside from offering up the constant pain of my physical conditions, I have no interest in increasing my pain and discomfort. Like most human beings, I do what I can to avoid extra pains, as I feel I have quite enough coming to me already. 

In particular, the enjoyment of food is something I have never been able to curtail, which has resulted in my zaftig physique. In fact, by the time I was five, my mother was calling me "fat" and this is the way I have remained for the majority of my life (except for about 7 years when I made what seemed to me to be a HUGE effort and I was substantially thinner.) I have been told by a few doctors that the abuse I endured as a child is largely responsible for this excess adipose tissue, but there remains the conviction in my mind that if I was really religious I would be able to get a handle on this problem. However, I am not dead yet, and we shall see if I am ever able to conquer this defect and follow the examples set by many of our saints.

There are all sorts of things to make Saint Rose dear to our hearts. She rebelled against the common practice of the day and refused marriage, preferring instead to stay home and commune with the Lord, engaging in spiritual practices under the disapproving eyes of her parents who preferred to have married her off. But all she wanted was union with the Divine.

Contrary to the imaginations of some, spiritual people who reject the usual parade of husband, children and grandchildren, will typically have some work to do. They don't float around their homes, toes inches from the floorboards. Labor is a healthy aspect of life, the need for which is shared by secular folks and monastics alike. In some of the icons painted of this saint, she is sewing.

Now, sewing is one of my creative outlets, in addition to being a wonderfully FUNCTIONAL skill to have. At this moment, I have about 20 yards of linen waiting for me to unroll it, wash, cut and sew it! When I see even a very pedestrian activity like this in one of our saints, my attention grabs onto it. Anything that will help me to feel confident that I can follow the path of the mystics is important to me. Saint Rose worked at embroidery in order to help support the family, but of course it did not provide the kind of income that comes with a wealthy and/or hard working son-in-law, and I don't imagine Rose's parents were at all mollified by whatever small sums were brought into the household as a result of her work.

Any person who displays a radical disparity between the family traditions and expectations and their own is going to be the object of constant pressure and sometimes ridicule within the family structure, even a devout Catholic family. Not every family wanted their children to become nuns, priests or some other kind of monastic. I am guessing that they may have been counting on the small dowry and the relief of having one less mouth to feed when their daughter reached marriageable age and a man took her out of this household, but there is also this tendency in human beings to try to force the nonconforming child into the mold of their tribe.

Further thoughts on this saint will be added at a later date.

Silver Rose

SAINT LIMBANIA - HERMITESS - AUGUST 16

 

SAINT LIMBANIA

Virgin, Hermitess

This post is a place mark, for the insertion of text at a later date.

King Saint Stephen I of Hungary - August 16

Saint Stephan of Hungary

977-1038

Saint Stephan was the husband of my first cousin, 29 times removed - Gizela von Bayern. They were the parents of Saint Emeric. I get a kick out of the variety of people to whom I have some familial connection. We call him a "shirt tail relation" when the person is related to us by marriage.

He was raised a Christian, as the son of a Magyar Chieftain named Geza, and Stephan was estimated to be between 20 and 22 when he succeeded him and became the last Grand Prince of the Hungarians in 997. Just the year before, he had married my cousin, Gisela of Bavaria, the daughter of Duke Henry II of Bavaria. Shortly after succeeding his father, he became the first King of Hungary in the year 1000, anointed by Pope Sylvester II.

Stephan was a tremendous supporter of the Christian faith during his reign, warring against various tribes and chieftains, building churches, advocating for the rights of the Holy See, and fighting against the pagan reaction to Christianity. It was concerning to me that he is reported .to have forcibly converted the Black Hungarians and was rewarded for it by Pope Sylvester II.

I often try to emulate virtues of the saints that are celebrated for the day, but I believe I will leave off the forced conversions! Saints make heroic efforts toward the ideal, and often there are miracles associated with them, but no human being is perfect, and the saints are not immune from this common imperfection.

If even the saints have failings, we can acknowledge our own without getting hysterical about it. None of us is so great that we are expected to be flawless. We all just do the best we can and hope for the best.

The way I figure it, if I can find a way to draw close to the saints, make them real to me and find some link to them, the inspiration may be greater. And I need all the help I can get. Sometimes, finding a point of commonality with a saint like King Saint Stephen of Hungary can be a challenge. I typically gravitate toward the mystics, the hermits and the anchoresses.  Contemplating Stephen's life story, I think I would like to emulate his strong faith, which he MUST have had in order to actually go to war over it, build churches and monastic institutions, and all the other efforts he made to normalize a new Christian culture in his country.

The Holy Right Hand of Saint Stephen of Hungary

Found to be incorrupt upon examination in his crypt

and thereafter "removed" and stored in this reliquary

Today I am coming to grips with some of my physical conditions that are gradually growing worse and making function difficult. I dropped my new computer last night and cracked the casing, so at only 3 months old, the poor baby has to go in to be fixed, which is terribly complicated because I have to back it up and encrypt it and arrange some kind of special security "key" to get back into it when it is returned to me. The man at Hewlett Packard who took my repair order has to call me back on Monday when the packaging is due to be delivered, and then he will walk me through it because I have hit the techno wall, something I thought would never happen.

I am breaking a lot of things lately. The long-term carpal tunnel syndrome has reduced the feeling in my fingers and makes me drop a lot of things. I can't count the number of phones I have cracked.

I used to get really mad at myself every time I dropped something or broke another phone, but I have decided to accept the reality of my situation. I am not being careless. I am not doing it deliberately. I am just old and broken - very broken, in some regards. I USED to be quite graceful, but no more. I have to accustom myself to the new reality and just deal with it. I am full of flaws, and there's little I can do about it. I used to be much more in charge of the direction of my life, but with the disabilities and aging, this is no longer the case.

Meanwhile, I hope you are enjoying these diary entries that juxtapose the saints with my daily doings. I hope to bring you into my life in these musings. I know I have nothing particularly grand to expound, but we are all together in this ordinary, daily grind of life, and it is in the ordinary production of our duties that we exhibit our faith. Saint Stephen did this in his kingly way, dealing with matters of state. and we do the same thing, but on a much less grand scale.

I hope this day finds you happy and serene.

God bless you all.

Silver Rose

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